Full Transcript (4961 lines)
00:00:18
Yeah.
00:00:20
It come.
00:00:24
Now we don't know.
00:00:32
How? Oh, it'll.
00:00:38
Some come back.
00:00:42
Some don't show.
00:00:54
Here's
00:00:55
to Jerry.
00:01:03
Cheers to Gay Ray.
00:01:12
Memories linger.
00:01:16
Remembering to care.
00:01:21
Echoes of laughter.
00:01:25
Now. Despair.
00:01:30
Couldn't save him.
00:01:32
Not even with his homemade knife.
00:01:38
Left.
00:01:39
You pick up the pieces.
00:01:41
The producers knocked up.
00:01:46
Here's
00:01:47
to Jerry.
00:01:55
Cheers to Jerry.
00:02:01
But fuck him if he's never coming back.
00:02:04
But fuck him hard.
00:02:13
Cheers to gay ring.
00:02:18
But fuck him if he's never coming back.
00:02:21
But fuck him hard.
00:02:30
Cheers to gay ring.
00:02:39
So we raise our glasses
00:02:43
with a mix of cheer.
00:02:48
To the ones who remain
00:02:52
standing tall, clear.
00:02:57
And to carry
00:03:00
the cup stepped like so.
00:03:06
May his memory fade.
00:03:09
With the dawn of each new show. Come
00:03:19
back.
00:03:23
Cheers to carry.
00:03:29
But fuck him if he's never coming back.
00:03:32
But fuck him hard.
00:03:41
Cheers to Jerry.
00:03:46
The fuck if if he's never coming back.
00:03:49
Well, fuck him hard.
00:04:03
The following is for entertainment purposes only.
00:04:05
Seriously, it's just a scripted fictional comedy show.
00:04:08
These guys are not experts, doctors, lawyers, therapists, or even particularly.
00:04:12
Well adjusted.
00:04:12
Everything you hear is opinion, exaggeration, sarcasm
00:04:15
or just plain nonsense.
00:04:16
Any resemblance to real people, events, or Uncle Dave is purely coincidental
00:04:20
and kind of hilarious.
00:04:21
They are not responsible for emotional damage,
00:04:23
cognitive dissonance, spontaneous enlightenment, or sudden urges
00:04:26
to start a cult.
00:04:27
Viewer discretion is advised, especially
00:04:29
if you're prone to taking things too seriously.
00:04:31
This is a late show.
00:04:32
It's not for kids.
00:04:33
Your boss or Karen from HR who will be hearing about this, by the way.
00:04:37
Side effects may include thinking, laughing, or yelling at your screen.
00:04:40
Fladge Rants Live is filmed before a live studio audience.
00:04:51
And. May.
00:05:52
Be. 000.
00:06:07
Eight.
00:06:18
The time is now.
00:06:20
Way too late to be talking about bread.
00:06:22
And yet here we are.
00:06:24
Because bread, humble, honest, fluffy
00:06:28
bread is not enough for some of us.
00:06:31
No, we demand that it go through something.
00:06:34
We can't just eat white bread as it is.
00:06:37
We have to make it reborn, dark and toasty.
00:06:41
Hi, I'm gay, airy and welcome to what is left of Vlad's Rants live.
00:06:45
I have to do a little housekeeping before I get into toast.
00:06:50
I suggest we all clean out the bottom of our toasters
00:06:53
before we start another fire.
00:06:57
Before we even get to the bread,
00:06:59
let's talk about where toasting really started.
00:07:03
And no, it wasn't just popping bread in a toaster.
00:07:06
It goes way back to the ancient Greeks.
00:07:10
Those guys didn't just invent democracy and tragic plays.
00:07:14
They also invented the toast, but not the kind you eat.
00:07:18
Back then, at big feasts, someone would stand up,
00:07:22
raise a cup of wine, and say some nice words about the gods,
00:07:26
the king, or just how good the food was, and then everyone would drink.
00:07:31
That's a toast. But here's the weird part.
00:07:34
The Greeks actually put a piece of bread
00:07:37
in the wine before drinking.
00:07:40
They thought the bread soaked up any poison lurking in the cup.
00:07:45
So toasting was literally dunking
00:07:48
soggy bread into wine and then sipping carefully around it.
00:07:51
Imagine that your ancestors had to do a bread swim before raising a glass.
00:07:58
It's no wonder the Greeks were so philosophical between
00:08:01
dodging Socrates questions and chewing wine soaked bread,
00:08:06
they had a lot of time to think about life and death.
00:08:10
That's where toasting started a mix of ceremony,
00:08:13
superstition, and a kind of ancient snack hack.
00:08:17
And that's the first clue that toast is more than just bread.
00:08:21
It's a ritual, a survival strategy,
00:08:25
and maybe a little bit of madness all rolled into one.
00:08:29
And that's what toast is.
00:08:30
Bread reincarnated,
00:08:33
the loafs afterlife, bread goes into the toaster,
00:08:37
comes out different, and it can never go back.
00:08:41
No priest can bless it back into Wonder Bread.
00:08:44
It has crossed over or.
00:08:46
And I'm just putting this out there.
00:08:48
Maybe toast is breads, poop.
00:08:52
Think about it.
00:08:53
Bread spends its short life on the counter.
00:08:55
It goes through the digestive system of heat
00:08:58
and, well, plop
00:09:02
a crispy little relic of what it used to be.
00:09:04
The ancient Greeks thought the bread absorb poison, which means two things.
00:09:10
One, poison was a normal Tuesday problem, and two people back
00:09:16
then apparently enjoyed chewing wet bread at the end of a nice vintage.
00:09:21
The Romans saw this and said yes,
00:09:24
but what if we burned the bread first?
00:09:26
Congratulations,
00:09:29
you've invented the crouton crime scene.
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Burnt bread chunks floating in wine
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like they fell in by accident and no one bothered to fish them out.
00:09:40
By the Middle Ages,
00:09:42
toast had left the cup and moved to the table.
00:09:45
But the process was medieval in every sense.
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Picture a king with a three foot long brass fork
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holding a hunk of bread dangerously close to a roaring fire,
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while a court jester nervously holds the butter.
00:10:01
People back them didn't know about degrees Fahrenheit.
00:10:04
They knew about degrees of singe.
00:10:07
Then came the pop up toaster in the 1920s,
00:10:10
marvel of modern convenience and chaos.
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It solved the holding bread over open flame problem, but replaced it with the.
00:10:20
Why does setting three sometimes mean perfect and sometimes mean?
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The bread is now a carbon deposit.
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Toaster
00:10:29
manufacturers won't tell you it's a secret society.
00:10:33
They meet once a year in a hotel conference room
00:10:36
and laugh about our confusion.
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Now here's the thing about toast
00:10:41
it's not just food, it's a personality test.
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You can tell a lot about someone by what they put on it.
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Butter.
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Classic. No nonsense.
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Possibly a spy jam.
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Sweet. Optimistic?
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Probably trust strangers.
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Too much avocado influencer or California or both.
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Peanut butter.
00:11:02
Practical. Resilient.
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Owns duct tape, Marmite or Vegemite.
00:11:07
Someone who enjoys pain and also wants you to enjoy it.
00:11:11
Nutella you've lost all control of your own life.
00:11:15
Dry toast.
00:11:16
You've wrong someone and they don't know it yet.
00:11:19
It's also emotional currency.
00:11:22
Nobody makes you toast when you're at your best.
00:11:26
Toast shows up when you're hungover, sick,
00:11:29
or going through something.
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Let's go a little slam poem with it.
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Bread sleeps in a line.
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In shroud a lever pulls.
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The sun rises inside a metal box.
00:11:41
And the loaf is judged. Crackle.
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Transformation.
00:11:46
The soul is crushed. Now.
00:11:48
And if that's too pretentious, here's the toast.
00:11:51
Wrap I got a slice in the slot.
00:11:55
And I'm feeling the heat.
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Bread getting crispy.
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Man, it can't be beat.
00:12:00
Spread that jam, yeah. Spread it real thick.
00:12:03
Flip that toast game up like a toaster.
00:12:06
Trick Golden brown, no noun.
00:12:08
Just a plate and a wife toasting.
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No fool man. Toast is life.
00:12:14
But here's the dual nature of the word.
00:12:18
To toast is to celebrate.
00:12:20
But to be toast is to be finished.
00:12:22
Toast is both a wedding speech and a mafia threat.
00:12:26
It is joy and doom spread with butter.
00:12:29
Here's a story.
00:12:31
There once was a man named Johnny who owned a small garden.
00:12:35
In this garden grew a single apple tree.
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Nothing special, just one tree among many.
00:12:42
Every year the tree would produce one perfect apple.
00:12:46
The man waited eagerly for the harvest,
00:12:49
dreaming of biting into that one perfect apple.
00:12:51
Sweet and crisp.
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But one year, a strong wind blew
00:12:57
and knocked the apple from the branch before it was ripe.
00:13:00
The apple fell into the dirt and rolled away, hidden beneath the bushes.
00:13:06
The man searched high and low for the lost apple but never found it.
00:13:11
He was sad at first.
00:13:13
The apple he'd hoped for was gone.
00:13:16
Then one morning as he walked past the garden,
00:13:20
he noticed a little bird pecking at some seeds near the bushes.
00:13:24
Among the scattered seeds the lost apple had broken open,
00:13:29
and from its core a new sapling had begun to grow.
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The man realized that sometimes the things we think we have lost
00:13:37
are just beginning new stories in places we never expected.
00:13:42
And that's the real true story of Johnny Appleseed.
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They've never told you for good reason.
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So when your toast burns, your host vanishes, or your minutes slip away.
00:13:53
Remember, sometimes loss is just the start of something else.
00:13:58
And then it stopped being about toast at all.
00:14:01
It started with toaster slot sizes and somehow ended
00:14:05
with a full blown conspiracy meeting in my kitchen.
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Picture a tiny, windowless
00:14:12
office somewhere behind your spice rack where they have a weekly powwow
00:14:17
called the Committee for Productive Annoyances.
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This committee is staffed by people who used to have normal hobbies
00:14:25
like pottery and model trains, and now their job
00:14:28
is to design things that almost work.
00:14:32
Their charter is simple make the user try minute one of the meeting.
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Chairperson Dave clears his throat and says, quote, we will make
00:14:42
the toaster slots just small enough that new bread does not fit comfortably.
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Minute two
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Specialist Alvarez emails a chart labeled Incremental Misery and suggests
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we make pocket linings thinner every other season.
00:14:58
Minute three someone in quality assurance presents a PowerPoint called
00:15:03
The Great Sock Attrition, and explains why socks migrate to a drier utopia.
00:15:09
The presentation has graphs and a slide titled this is not a mistake.
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It is an ecosystem.
00:15:16
And from that room of rational people comes a ripple effect of tiny betrayals.
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The grocery stores starts packaging bread in rectangle goals
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just shy of two fingers wider than your grandmother used to slice.
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Clothing designers decide that a woman may, in fact,
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only need a coin pocket the size of a thumbnail.
00:15:38
Shoe manufacturers whisper sweet nothings to your toes
00:15:42
and promise comfort in exchange for slightly narrower, less shapes.
00:15:48
No single action is malicious.
00:15:50
It is the the accumulation of design decisions
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made by committees of reasonable people who never had to keep both hands full
00:15:59
and walk up three flights of stairs
00:16:02
while balancing a coffee and a wife's temper tantrum.
00:16:06
The result is a world that fits nothing perfectly
00:16:09
and thus generates endless stories,
00:16:12
which is the point where I stop caring about corporate sabotage
00:16:17
and start imagining the lost things themselves.
00:16:21
The dryer is not a machine.
00:16:23
It is a borderline city.
00:16:25
Socks do not vanish.
00:16:26
They migrate.
00:16:27
They leave tiny suitcases in the lint trap and build
00:16:31
neighborhoods behind lint towers.
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They have a mayor.
00:16:36
The mayor is a single Argyll who escaped from a college laundry room in 1999
00:16:41
and has been organizing the sock diaspora ever since.
00:16:46
Look it up.
00:16:47
Keys and Matchbooks show up looking for shelter
00:16:51
hens that never kept properly form a union and demand better pensions.
00:16:56
I once dreamed a sock told me its life story.
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It said my owner loved me.
00:17:01
I was marched through puddles and been tucked into cranky gym bags.
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I saw things I cannot unsee.
00:17:09
Then one day there was a rumble.
00:17:12
Speaking of
00:17:12
rumble, now is a good time to like, subscribe, comment please.
00:17:16
Right down there.
00:17:18
It's free and easy and seriously helps the show.
00:17:21
Where was I?
00:17:22
Oh yeah.
00:17:23
Then one day there was a rumble, a woosh, a spin,
00:17:27
and when the door opened, I was in a new republic
00:17:30
where lint is currency and the dryer drum is a stadium.
00:17:36
Apparently the dryer plays a sport called tumble.
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The Argyle mayor officiates.
00:17:42
From there my mind went further.
00:17:44
If lost, things form societies.
00:17:46
What about lost minutes?
00:17:49
The minutes you waste scrolling, the minutes you spend in waiting rooms
00:17:53
with outdated magazines, the minutes
00:17:56
you say I will call and never do.
00:18:00
Do those minutes gather at midnight?
00:18:02
Do they hold a memorial?
00:18:04
I picture them shivering together like flames under a bell jar,
00:18:09
whispering how they were almost used for something meaningful,
00:18:13
and instead watched sandwich videos until two in the morning.
00:18:18
They organize into patrols and go back to the places
00:18:22
they were abandoned and try to rescue other minutes.
00:18:26
They fail gracefully and then decide to start a podcast.
00:18:30
I am not stopping.
00:18:32
The rabbit hole opens wider.
00:18:34
I start thinking about the Department of Small Rituals.
00:18:38
This department catalogs the tiny human acts we perform to feel steady,
00:18:44
tucking a blanket under your chin to test if the world still makes sense,
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saying the same goodbye twice just to make sure the door heard you.
00:18:54
Turning your coffee cup three times before taking a sip.
00:18:57
Because on the third rotation in the world of lines,
00:19:01
someone in that department files a report.
00:19:04
Every time a ritual is interrupted,
00:19:07
they keep a ledger labeled interrupted rituals,
00:19:11
and when the ledger gets heavy, the building creaks in a sympathetic way.
00:19:16
There is a corollary to this if small design choices and small rituals
00:19:21
accumulate to create hour days, then the little breaks are where the meaning
00:19:27
hides the crook mug you always use
00:19:30
because all the good mugs are in the dishwasher.
00:19:33
The mismatched chopsticks you prefer because they make you slow down and laugh.
00:19:39
The single houseplant that refuses to die because you gave it names on Tuesdays.
00:19:46
These are the rebellions against efficiency.
00:19:49
They are the quiet protests that say we do not want everything
00:19:53
streamlined into a perfect efficiency machine.
00:19:57
We want character.
00:20:00
We want to keep a little socket for accidents.
00:20:02
And then I fall into the memory of a street vendor
00:20:06
who sold balloon animals at a parade this summer.
00:20:10
My aunt learned to waltz.
00:20:12
He made a long green snake that kept on tying itself.
00:20:15
Reminds me, let's go WNBA.
00:20:18
What are we up to?
00:20:19
Four green snakes now. Five.
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I held it and felt important for three minutes.
00:20:25
When the snake popped later that day, I cried and nobody understood
00:20:29
because the adult world has rigid rules
00:20:33
about which losses are serious.
00:20:36
A sock lost in a dryer is unremarkable.
00:20:39
A balloon is suddenly a home for grief.
00:20:42
But both are moments where something playful refused to obey the plan.
00:20:46
Boing!
00:20:48
At some
00:20:48
point, this becomes less about lost things
00:20:51
and more about the way humans try to narrate their own lives.
00:20:56
We make metaphors from objects
00:20:59
because objects are patient with our stories.
00:21:02
You can tell a toaster your secret,
00:21:05
and it will only pop in a few minutes and pretend to be surprised.
00:21:10
You can tell a sock your plans and it will keep them warm.
00:21:14
In my head, every object I have ever owned
00:21:17
has retained a little memory of being held by me.
00:21:21
They gossip at night.
00:21:23
The toaster brags about the time I almost put a pop tart in upside down.
00:21:28
The kettle is prim and disapproving.
00:21:31
The armchair keeps receipts.
00:21:34
There is a tender cruelty to this world,
00:21:36
making we build things that almost fit
00:21:40
and then blame the people for not fitting in.
00:21:43
We make schedules we cannot keep and then call ourselves failures.
00:21:48
But there is also a stubborn kindness.
00:21:51
The toaster still offers you toast even when you are a wreck.
00:21:56
The sock that escaped the dryer May 1st day
00:21:59
come back as a patch on a child's knee
00:22:03
and be happier than it was spinning in lint.
00:22:05
The last minute might become the one where you decided to forgive someone
00:22:11
and let them podcast again, or to just
00:22:14
simply stand up from the couch and go outside.
00:22:18
If you are lucky.
00:22:20
The thing you thought was gone forever.
00:22:22
Is it just in a better story than the one you were telling?
00:22:26
And because I cannot resist turning
00:22:29
everything into a small performance piece,
00:22:32
here is a tiny chorus for all the misplaced things.
00:22:37
Feel free to shout it in your kitchen at 2 a.m..
00:22:40
We are the lost and the left behind.
00:22:42
We are the sock holes in the pocket lint.
00:22:44
Can we gather in the drum.
00:22:46
Where the tumble spins, spins, trade stories and t.
00:22:50
And the minutes you throw. Then I laugh
00:22:53
because of course I am anthropomorphizing.
00:22:56
I am gay and that is my job.
00:22:59
But maybe that is also your job
00:23:01
to hold the objects up to the light and give them a name.
00:23:05
To make a ritual of looking for things
00:23:08
instead of pretending they do not matter,
00:23:11
to keep a small seat at the table for accidents.
00:23:14
So the toaster slots are designed too small,
00:23:17
so someone, somewhere thought it was clever to make bread
00:23:21
be only sometimes compatible with your appliance.
00:23:25
That is not the tragedy.
00:23:27
The tragedy would be if we never let that small mismatch become a story.
00:23:33
The tragedy would be if the lost socks and the stray minutes
00:23:36
and the crooked mugs all spun in silence, while we kept pretending
00:23:41
we live in a perfectly measured world
00:23:44
for a few hours every Monday, 10 p.m.
00:23:48
eastern.
00:23:49
Now wipe your hands, straighten your spine,
00:23:52
take the mismatched sock and fold it into something less fudge.
00:23:56
I know, like take the minute you almost threw away and turn it into a sentence.
00:24:03
Take that sentence and turn it into a monologue.
00:24:06
Take that, monologue and turn it into a show.
00:24:10
Make a toast for the small things that will not stand up for themselves.
00:24:14
Raise your cup and say thank you to the weird little committee
00:24:17
that makes life complicated.
00:24:19
So these stories have to exist.
00:24:22
Cheers.
00:24:23
We are toast now.
00:24:26
Roll the clip.
00:24:33
We got to get going now.
00:24:37
Our lives and our lives.
00:24:39
And here's to life I need bread.
00:24:42
I just divorced my old maid.
00:24:46
I live, you know.
00:24:47
I took the court's decision.
00:24:49
They gave him the kids in the morning and.
00:25:00
I got to get it out.
00:25:01
I got to get it out.
00:25:09
Oh. What?
00:25:10
This electrocute me.
00:25:22
I don't know how to start the show without.
00:25:23
I don't I'm not sure how to steer this show without a whole lot.
00:25:28
Did it electrocute him?
00:25:29
I was going to play what happened next?
00:25:31
But I paused it a second. Too late.
00:25:34
Why would you do that?
00:25:37
What happens next?
00:25:41
What is electrocute me?
00:25:53
I don't know if electrocute me.
00:25:58
I like the way you could hear the sound of his, internet disconnecting.
00:26:02
Let's.
00:26:02
Oh, well, this electrocute me.
00:26:10
Wait.
00:26:11
I think I saw him dead.
00:26:12
Wait right here.
00:26:18
He's asleep now.
00:26:18
He's just sleeping. He's fine. He'll be fine.
00:26:21
We just got reports that he's fine.
00:26:23
Oh, no.
00:26:24
Wait.
00:26:41
We're toast.
00:26:42
That's the theme of this show.
00:26:43
Without a host, we might be toast.
00:26:46
You think so?
00:26:48
I mean, I don't know.
00:26:50
It's up and down
00:26:52
the dead of summer, the dog days.
00:26:53
Damn.
00:26:55
I don't think that's up.
00:26:56
Down, really. Watching.
00:26:58
Oh, yeah. It really doesn't matter what we do.
00:27:00
We can do anything.
00:27:01
I forgot to put on my shirt, I guess.
00:27:03
Doesn't matter anymore. Doesn't?
00:27:06
What is it, a ladder so we can reach it.
00:27:09
I'm going to get new emergencies X fly Dragons.
00:27:12
I think I'm just going to print out a picture of our faces
00:27:14
and put it right over that.
00:27:18
Yeah, yeah.
00:27:19
Behind the scenes.
00:27:20
Look right here.
00:27:21
His memory fades away with each new show.
00:27:28
I mean, that's just the way it is.
00:27:32
That's just the way the.
00:27:37
It's just too.
00:27:40
We can make it if we just, Just do.
00:27:43
So it is our classic.
00:27:50
Cheers.
00:27:53
Cheers.
00:27:56
I've got toasts, but
00:27:57
they are not YouTube friendly.
00:28:00
Oh, me to be on the Rumble exclusive side.
00:28:03
Do you got the same? This toast.
00:28:04
You got the same other old lady that I have.
00:28:07
What?
00:28:09
What do you think I have?
00:28:11
The toast.
00:28:12
That was my favorite toast on the internet.
00:28:14
And we can't play it on YouTube. Why not?
00:28:18
I can't even say why we can play this toast.
00:28:22
And it's wrestling.
00:28:23
Oh, fuck.
00:28:24
Oh. She's ready.
00:28:25
You know.
00:28:28
Toast is ready.
00:28:29
Oh. Fuck up. Hey, man. Toast.
00:28:32
I ready? Oh.
00:28:36
It's very late.
00:28:38
Toast is ready.
00:28:39
Yeah. Oh.
00:28:42
Toast is ready.
00:28:45
Toast is ready.
00:28:48
Toast is ready.
00:28:51
I don't get it. There's no toast in there.
00:28:53
It's not plugged in. The toast is not ready.
00:28:55
There are usually just three times.
00:28:57
Oh, wait, I get it. It's wrestling.
00:28:58
Oh, we just pretend that toast is ready.
00:29:01
Oh, yeah.
00:29:01
It's toast.
00:29:03
Yeah.
00:29:07
So I would take the toaster and go.
00:29:09
It's ready.
00:29:10
I like wrestling. It.
00:29:13
And then it would just be.
00:29:15
Toast is ready. Oh.
00:29:19
That's good.
00:29:19
When I toast, it doesn't really.
00:29:23
Toast is ready.
00:29:26
So can you can you explain this to this?
00:29:29
Start from a, an event or.
00:29:31
I have no idea. No idea.
00:29:34
All I know is the toast is ready.
00:29:41
Let's go.
00:29:41
Ultimate toast is ready. Montage.
00:29:44
It's something that started off as nothing
00:29:46
more than a one time gag that turned into a bit of a tradition.
00:29:51
In short, take a toaster and smash it over someone's going eyes and say,
00:29:56
as I say,
00:29:58
the now famous words, toast is ready.
00:30:00
Why was it so hard to
00:30:03
that's so violent in nine? Gary?
00:30:05
Like Gary, like a passive. What if he would have a toaster?
00:30:07
He wouldn't slam it.
00:30:08
I know, or somebody said he would never do that.
00:30:19
This is more.
00:30:22
I have to note
00:30:22
this is in the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase.
00:30:26
This is an hour.
00:30:27
You can see this live.
00:30:29
You look at the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase.
00:30:31
I don't want to brag. I don't want to boast.
00:30:35
I always tell them I like, told
00:30:38
you, I'm.
00:30:39
I'm perfectly straight. I haven't had anything to drink.
00:30:42
I've hit my bowl once. Now, why do you have to started?
00:30:44
Why does anyone have to start with that?
00:30:46
I've never needed to start a sentence with I'm perfectly straight.
00:30:50
You trying to say a fuck starts a conversation like that.
00:30:54
Exactly.
00:30:54
What I'm trying to say is this reminds me
00:30:57
exactly of a bit on The Muppet Show, and he suddenly looks like a muppet.
00:31:02
He even sounds like
00:31:04
that one Muppet.
00:31:05
I can't, I don't know if he's the gold tooth guy or but.
00:31:07
Or if he's the dog, but listen, he sounds just like him.
00:31:11
I think he is.
00:31:12
There's a hand up as it goes.
00:31:16
Yeah. No.
00:31:19
I get up in the morning about 6 a.m..
00:31:22
I have a little jelly.
00:31:24
I have a little jam.
00:31:26
I thought it was a good piece of bread.
00:31:28
Put it in the slot.
00:31:29
I hope you like him a lot, because all the monetization
00:31:31
we're going to get from the show is going to go to him now.
00:31:34
Yeah, yeah. Those.
00:31:36
I liked it so much, I figured, why not
00:31:38
just figure those fuck over YouTube from the get go?
00:31:42
Well, the trick is for him, even though they claim the monetization,
00:31:45
they do it for shows that aren't even able to be monetized yet.
00:31:49
So they can have 100% of our $0
00:31:52
or 0% of our $100.
00:31:55
You pick.
00:31:56
Yeah. Don't.
00:31:59
He's a muppet.
00:32:03
How do you feel about the beard?
00:32:04
No. Mustache.
00:32:06
Fashion.
00:32:07
It's a weird look. It's very.
00:32:08
It it's works for him. It's comedian.
00:32:11
It's, you know, especially with the hair. It's like in the glasses.
00:32:14
Oh, look at me.
00:32:15
It's like if it's somebody, with a goofy,
00:32:19
go to, you know, Snaggle tooth and some goofy glasses, wear a lab coat.
00:32:22
And it was bald. It was just like, look at me. I'm wearing a lab coat.
00:32:25
You know, it's the same like, yuck, yuck, yuck.
00:32:29
I think his wife made him do it.
00:32:31
I think his wife would actually prefer him.
00:32:33
He stopped.
00:32:34
And I bet you she's probably going to maybe make some type of ultimatum
00:32:39
that, results in, pick off.
00:32:46
For many years now, I've been a booster
00:32:49
for the
00:32:49
browning of the bread inside a toaster.
00:32:53
If it gets burnt, I just start hollering, have some creative license.
00:32:57
Oh, you know, I'm lactose intolerant.
00:32:59
First out
00:33:02
is black toast.
00:33:03
Intolerant racist.
00:33:04
Beep beep bam.
00:33:05
Smokey toast.
00:33:09
Oh, we marshmallows.
00:33:10
Y'all go get.
00:33:13
Oh, get us.
00:33:15
These guys should try go down America's go to Eiffel Tower.
00:33:19
Have you seen some of that lately?
00:33:21
I get my swag. Crap.
00:33:22
No one from no one from America is on it,
00:33:26
right? Stop.
00:33:27
It's horrible.
00:33:29
I don't think a single act is from America Square.
00:33:32
Hang on.
00:33:32
Yeah, you just brought that up.
00:33:34
I'm not playing it because I don't want to give it any credibility.
00:33:36
But I watched an opera singer get painted
00:33:39
last night.
00:33:40
Yeah, she was from America.
00:33:41
She was like the one person from America.
00:33:43
It was so stage.
00:33:44
So they had a whole nother bucket or been of.
00:33:46
They didn't even bring out the water balloons.
00:33:49
But as soon as all the hosts were invited up, they had like a water balloon fight.
00:33:52
It was so pathetically staged.
00:33:56
My issue
00:33:57
fake not only with the fact that there was so many for it.
00:34:00
Like literally from foreign countries.
00:34:02
This is America's Got Talent.
00:34:03
They come to America to show talent.
00:34:06
I don't even think you mean like it.
00:34:08
Yeah, I don't I don't understand, dude.
00:34:09
Your own Got Talent show or move to America
00:34:12
and then be on America's Got Talent.
00:34:14
I don't know what you're saying is you want make America's Got Talent again?
00:34:18
Yeah, I want make America.
00:34:20
Yeah. Magda,
00:34:22
what makes you also was.
00:34:23
It was. It was confusing.
00:34:24
I have to watch it and ears.
00:34:25
But, they chose a bunch of people.
00:34:27
So you watched everyone, like, audition,
00:34:29
and you're like, okay, I can't wait to see that.
00:34:31
That act. But they whittled a bunch of acts down
00:34:33
before they even made it to the next round.
00:34:35
So there was people that they okayed that never even made it out.
00:34:38
And you never got to see you again
00:34:41
because
00:34:41
they showed like videos of like them getting like a call like, oh,
00:34:44
like almost like a draft, like, oh, you made it to the live show.
00:34:47
And it's like, well, what was the buzzer audition for then?
00:34:50
I don't understand what
00:34:52
I could tell just by the way they had that staged water balloon fight.
00:34:54
They're jumping the shark.
00:34:56
They are out of ideas to get people to tune in.
00:34:58
Yeah, just a little weird, though.
00:34:59
I mean, I never watch the show, but for whatever reason,
00:35:02
it was on my TV last night and I watched.
00:35:03
It's just a little bit boring, you know, they need new.
00:35:06
They need a whole new line of hosts, I'm sure, because, like, it's just vanilla.
00:35:10
They need it. It's just they all suck everyone's dicks.
00:35:12
It's like it's a love fest.
00:35:14
It's like even the people that fucking that that suck, they
00:35:18
not the people.
00:35:19
Anything wrong?
00:35:20
They let them down really nicely.
00:35:21
They're like, oh you're you're just oh it's all it's a love fest.
00:35:24
It's annoying. I thought Simon was the heel.
00:35:27
No. He's like he, you know, ever since he had kids and shit, I don't know.
00:35:30
He's changed.
00:35:31
Like Howie Mandel tries to subtly get the I into horrible arguments
00:35:35
with my wife about that.
00:35:37
Whenever a sports athlete has a baby or gets married,
00:35:40
their production and performance just goes.
00:35:42
She's like, no, it makes them better people.
00:35:44
And they find out
00:35:45
I'm like, no, dude, it they, they get different priorities instantly.
00:35:48
The day that the day they look into that baby's eyes or hold
00:35:51
or say I do or whatever happens to them, it's life changing.
00:35:54
He turned into a fagot.
00:35:56
That's why Tom Brady got divorced and his family life suck.
00:35:59
That's why he's really good at football.
00:36:01
It was a man, so I was able to play football so well and it was later stages.
00:36:06
That being said, Jared Goff to JFK said peace, JFK, child peace is strange.
00:36:11
Every day is what he's quoted at some point.
00:36:14
And did he do you think he had a very good job performance?
00:36:17
Up to a certain point, yeah, probably when he got caught
00:36:21
and stopped getting the strange, oh no, we suck again.
00:36:29
I saw all kinds of sports this last week.
00:36:31
I didn't report last week, but I saw the Lions opening game down in Ohio.
00:36:36
It was fantastic.
00:36:37
You went there, I went there, you went to Ohio.
00:36:40
I went to Ohio.
00:36:41
I am so, so sorry.
00:36:43
It took me two days.
00:36:44
Oh, sorry.
00:36:44
Wash the Ohio off of us. But yeah,
00:36:47
I went to your stupid for a few days.
00:36:50
I was like, I don't travel a lot.
00:36:51
What what what what what?
00:36:53
Georgia that's what I always say whenever I do anything in my life.
00:36:55
Now go to see you. Find my circle, K.
00:36:58
No, but I thought I'd go to a Holiday Inn Express because I remember
00:37:01
you mentioning that that's.
00:37:02
That's the place to go.
00:37:04
No, I never mentioned that.
00:37:05
No, it was you must with somebody else.
00:37:07
Yeah, it was horrifying. It's horrible. They.
00:37:09
I would never say the Holiday Inn Express
00:37:11
where they, they had a reservation, but they overbooked.
00:37:15
Apparently planes and hotels do that all the time just to make sure.
00:37:18
And they shipped us across the railroad tracks to the shitty Cambodia.
00:37:22
No, I'm sorry. Cambio hotel.
00:37:24
That seemed like it was just like Cambodia to me.
00:37:27
Just a few miles makes a big difference when you're in the middle.
00:37:29
Like how you blame me for your terrible hotel decision?
00:37:32
No, I honestly was thinking, and I remember,
00:37:35
I thought, I remember thinking that I'm the was always canceled.
00:37:38
I'm always at Hilton. Oh, you're the Hilton is a hit.
00:37:40
The Hilton's always consistent.
00:37:41
I you know the
00:37:43
that's that's that's you don't pay that. No.
00:37:45
That's expense.
00:37:46
Yeah. Is it was it show show material
00:37:51
I wanted to get?
00:37:52
I was hoping we were gonna have a. Where in the world was that?
00:37:55
Would it fit in better? But I just figured I'd say it now.
00:37:58
But then even better, after we went to.
00:38:00
Do You Think I am?
00:38:01
After I went to Akron.
00:38:02
Cleveland and spent the day.
00:38:04
Akron. Cleveland.
00:38:06
Akron. Cleveland area. It's called Ohio.
00:38:08
Akron, Ohio.
00:38:09
Let me think.
00:38:10
It was called Cleveland Ring, Spring Township or Spring.
00:38:13
I thought we were in Springfield, Ohio. For a while. I kept looking for,
00:38:17
cross train.
00:38:19
No mean the dogs are eating the cake.
00:38:20
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That one.
00:38:22
I don't think that was ever a thing, but I don't know, maybe it was.
00:38:25
Well, not. And it was a really nice area. So I was thinking it's total bullshit.
00:38:27
But then I realized I was in Spring Township, not Spring Field
00:38:32
at last.
00:38:33
Last weekend. No. Yesterday.
00:38:35
Yesterday we spent the day in the city of Detroit
00:38:40
and we had a magnificent time.
00:38:42
It was great.
00:38:43
Why would you spend the day there?
00:38:45
Because the fuck I.
00:38:46
Why would you. Why would you spend.
00:38:49
Hey, it was hot. I can't find it.
00:38:50
I said we spent the day, but, I mean, we went early and we were done
00:38:53
by, like, you know, 3:00 when it started to get hot as fuck.
00:38:57
Yeah. Though, we saw the tall ships.
00:38:59
The tall ships were there.
00:39:00
This one did not these these were manned by American.
00:39:02
So they did not hit a bridge and collapse and kill people like the Mexican Navy.
00:39:06
But you know, things that.
00:39:09
No, it wasn't any kind of, oh.
00:39:12
Wasn't any border security or ice
00:39:16
could have been,
00:39:18
so pissed.
00:39:20
I can't find they're eating the dogs or eating the cats.
00:39:22
Musical song.
00:39:23
And I know I have it in a drive somewhere, and it's just it's gone.
00:39:25
Disappeared. So you drink one beer.
00:39:27
You're not an alcoholic.
00:39:29
You make one song on SoundCloud.
00:39:31
You're not a rapper.
00:39:33
But I suck one.
00:39:37
I mean,
00:39:38
being that the topic is toast, I got lots of sandwiches.
00:39:41
Lots of sandwiches.
00:39:43
I will give you a total pardon for murdering that woman.
00:39:47
I forgot I pulled that one.
00:39:49
Would you just hit a random one because you couldn't find the one you wanted?
00:39:51
Yeah, it was, wasn't it?
00:39:52
Was Trump related, so I figured it's close enough.
00:39:54
Here's something I learned as a drummer after 15 years.
00:39:57
Sometimes
00:39:58
even you guys get a greatest idea and you're waiting in the song to play it.
00:40:01
I mean, you had the idea since before the song even started.
00:40:03
You may have had the idea since you even got there.
00:40:05
Sometimes it's better, just not to play it.
00:40:08
Just let it go.
00:40:12
Or here's another idea that's going to be repeated version.
00:40:15
You could shut the fuck up.
00:40:17
They're eating the dogs.
00:40:18
They're eating the cats.
00:40:20
Eat the cat, eat the cat.
00:40:22
They're eating the dogs.
00:40:23
They're eating the cats.
00:40:25
All right.
00:40:25
Trying to think
00:40:28
since, you got it.
00:40:31
Congratulations.
00:40:32
It's in Springfield.
00:40:33
Reference. Finally.
00:40:35
Long time, long time coming for that one.
00:40:39
So we're going to, we're going to go back to this.
00:40:41
We're going to
00:40:43
oh, oh.
00:40:45
Toast,
00:40:47
toast or toast to toast.
00:40:52
Right. So you guys ready town?
00:40:55
Oh, no. Knows.
00:40:58
Say town.
00:41:01
All right.
00:41:01
Yeah. That's
00:41:03
to to.
00:41:05
Oh. Oh, sir.
00:41:09
This, sir.
00:41:11
No nuts.
00:41:12
You just you're doing too much.
00:41:14
It's so is wrong to.
00:41:17
I don't say toast.
00:41:19
So so to toaster. Oh
00:41:23
sir. To toast.
00:41:27
I also don't say toast.
00:41:29
Do you say toast to
00:41:32
toast?
00:41:33
No town
00:41:36
knows what.
00:41:37
Say town.
00:41:42
Those are the same words.
00:41:43
They sound completely different to me.
00:41:45
Oh, toast. Sir.
00:41:48
See they do, sir, to
00:41:50
toast to their own toast.
00:41:53
Toast that. So to.
00:41:56
Oh, sir.
00:41:59
To toast to to try this one.
00:42:02
Oh, can I get some toast to this or,
00:42:05
some for some toast to to with your,
00:42:08
I guess,
00:42:13
This is Gary's opening video.
00:42:14
Since he's watching, I hope, like you said, that that's just.
00:42:19
Hey, I.
00:42:24
There's no
00:42:24
there's not an actual human being.
00:42:27
It's worrying me, though.
00:42:28
Like, the more and more like I was driving today,
00:42:30
and I was wondering why people could be so stupid.
00:42:32
And I realized it's like sitting at flashing yellow lights.
00:42:35
It's changing lanes because their car
00:42:37
practically makes all the decisions for them now, newer cars.
00:42:40
So when it's up to them, they're an experience
00:42:43
that you can drive around like all these old people with new cars
00:42:47
you can drive around with barely knowing how to drive or barely driving at all.
00:42:50
As with this gets more and more relied upon.
00:42:54
People are going to lose the ability to drive completely.
00:42:57
I know autonomous cars are coming, but until then, it sucks.
00:43:00
Driving out there.
00:43:02
I do field work so I could drive from place to place.
00:43:05
Look man, driving is a choice.
00:43:08
It is. But I choose to work.
00:43:10
Is that. Does that makes sense?
00:43:12
Makes sense to me.
00:43:13
Yeah. It's the choice, the work that I have.
00:43:15
You know, there's lots of people that don't.
00:43:17
I enjoy my independent truck. I'm driving.
00:43:20
I do it safely, but that's my time.
00:43:22
You know, it's nice.
00:43:24
But lately, more than ever, people just do not know how to drive.
00:43:29
It's frustrating.
00:43:31
This has nothing to do with driving.
00:43:33
I just want to get it off my chest.
00:43:35
Although they were,
00:43:38
You you.
00:43:42
What a nice, peaceful.
00:43:43
Want to drive?
00:43:44
Here are five ways to use one of these things on a trampoline.
00:43:48
Number one, what are those things? Oh,
00:43:51
lace up.
00:43:51
I'm asking you. Don't.
00:43:54
Those things are what I would call a gym scooter.
00:43:58
I don't know what other existence. Scooter?
00:44:00
Yeah, we used to play scooter basketball and scooter soccer and scooter hockey
00:44:04
and scooter and scooter. Because whatever.
00:44:06
Why did you just play basketball and soccer?
00:44:08
Because the gym teacher had 280 fucking days to fill each year.
00:44:11
And I don't know, good, good gym dude, if you never played
00:44:16
scooter fill in the blank.
00:44:18
Please comment below because you need to have.
00:44:21
It's amazing.
00:44:22
No, no, it's because the best part is look,
00:44:24
I see now they've added safety handles to put your fingers in.
00:44:27
But when I played, those were not there and people would lose their fingers
00:44:30
because they would bump together and you'd be flying in the best guys
00:44:34
that were good at
00:44:35
it would realize if you turn around, you could go real fucking fast.
00:44:38
And then there are other people, you know the difference when you're
00:44:41
ten, there's people that are six foot taller, people that are two foot tall.
00:44:44
It was fun. It was like pinball.
00:44:47
We never did it on a dime.
00:44:50
To compare everything in elementary school
00:44:54
gym is probably pretty dumb.
00:44:57
I haven't slept for about get hit the left hand.
00:45:00
My left.
00:45:01
No, but no.
00:45:03
Yo, kickflip.
00:45:06
Oh, I'm on X games. No,
00:45:10
mama, I bet you there's a trampoline down there.
00:45:13
My mom said I have a really nice.
00:45:18
Bob, this is the same guy
00:45:19
he watches that catches footballs and shit.
00:45:22
I'm on for.
00:45:26
That guy.
00:45:29
Is this, like, safe jackass for work?
00:45:32
Well, Oh.
00:45:40
Okay.
00:45:40
It's over.
00:45:45
I'm sorry.
00:45:46
I should have watched that first.
00:45:48
So, what was it?
00:45:52
Hold on, there's comments.
00:45:53
Have we been going through comments?
00:45:56
Yeah. Yeah, I got them all. It's just Gary.
00:45:58
We skipped the ones that we don't need to hear because he's not part of the show.
00:46:00
If he wants to be part of the show, you can call an at 158633
00:46:04
or he can click on the link because it's his show.
00:46:08
I don't
00:46:09
know, Gary texted when like 30 minutes ago.
00:46:13
If only there was footage of him using a toaster.
00:46:16
I think we I think we have just that.
00:46:19
Yeah,
00:46:20
yeah.
00:46:21
I don't, I don't think that's it.
00:46:23
Holy shit. What's happening?
00:46:25
This is bizarre. This is just bizarre.
00:46:28
There's.
00:46:31
What did he do to the bottom?
00:46:32
Did it? Shit.
00:46:33
See? I'm right. Like. Oh, yeah, I like it.
00:46:35
Puts it in a at a weird angle.
00:46:37
Toast is the fucking bread's poop.
00:46:43
He's, like, munching on something, too.
00:46:45
Was eating into the microphone.
00:46:48
You know who Nestle?
00:46:51
I don't know, there was one of the one of them, him in the pool.
00:46:53
I tried to do the same thing with the one with him in the pool, and I didn't.
00:46:56
It didn't do a toaster at all. So I don't know what the deal is.
00:47:00
I don't know why this one was toaster.
00:47:02
Toaster with the other one on.
00:47:05
But, yeah.
00:47:07
Right there.
00:47:09
If only there was footage of him using a toaster.
00:47:11
Oh, there, there, there you have it.
00:47:13
So the bizarre, the bizarre, the bizarre.
00:47:16
Shall I do it again? Very I love it.
00:47:19
The bizarre thing was this.
00:47:20
You made that long before the text, right?
00:47:22
Or did you just go, oh, no, I didn't get it right.
00:47:24
Yeah, I made it because, look, I made this One Ring app
00:47:30
and this one just looks way better.
00:47:32
Oh, great.
00:47:33
So, the girl that usually does this for us
00:47:37
gives a little sexy shimmy dance girl waiting.
00:47:41
I making a sandwich.
00:47:42
Think that's the only thing that came through on the, the original one.
00:47:45
It's very funny.
00:47:48
That's it.
00:47:49
Was he talking, discussing, making sandwiches?
00:47:52
Yeah, he made a sandwich last week.
00:47:53
He was talking about that video.
00:47:55
That may not have been. I.
00:47:58
So, talking about making clips.
00:48:01
Now we have two.
00:48:02
We have two sandwich bumpers because I made one of those last week, too.
00:48:05
But you did. Oh, I didn't realize you did it.
00:48:08
You made me a sandwich.
00:48:09
I'm well here.
00:48:12
You made that for me?
00:48:15
Yeah.
00:48:15
We should not cut you.
00:48:21
Today we're grilling
00:48:22
the ultimate mash up grilled chicken meets panel popper meets grilled cheese.
00:48:26
It's cheesy, spicy, a little smoky, and totally ridiculous in the best way.
00:48:30
You'll never look at a sandwich the same way again.
00:48:32
Mash up.
00:48:36
Okay, now we're going to just cut through this
00:48:38
because we're not watching the whole, you know, 12 minutes.
00:48:40
We're just going to watch cider vinegar.
00:48:41
This now gets oh wait, I got it.
00:48:43
We got at least see what he starts with.
00:48:47
The bacon.
00:48:48
That's bacon and onions.
00:48:51
Mixed in.
00:48:52
That's a great start. That's a great start.
00:48:55
We let it cook for about a minute, make a little space.
00:48:58
You know what's come in. Little garlic.
00:49:00
Let it get fragrant.
00:49:02
Ever. What's now.
00:49:03
Sounds like the rest of my nonsense is not legit.
00:49:06
Right.
00:49:07
Switch this off to the side and we can carry on sides.
00:49:12
We're making enough basically for two sandwiches, so.
00:49:14
All right. When these are like this, let's go to the grill.
00:49:17
First thing in we have a pan goes into my mesh pan.
00:49:21
So it doesn't really matter.
00:49:22
You're going to do both sides but let's be anal shall we.
00:49:25
Insert them all in there back God damn it. It's anal.
00:49:28
Gee look, these are cooking guide tongs.
00:49:30
Look how cute they are.
00:49:31
Oh, they even say made to cook.
00:49:33
There's silicone on one side. There, he did it.
00:49:36
He did it.
00:49:37
That's the pass fail test.
00:49:38
If you ever see that, there's like 4 or 5 things.
00:49:42
One of the things is a man hands a woman, usually his wife, the tongs,
00:49:45
and she just looks at him and goes with fucking.
00:49:47
It goes, because when you're handed a pair of tongs,
00:49:51
you are. Oh, they're a smiley face.
00:49:53
And those tongs they are.
00:49:54
When you're handed a pair of tongs, you are 100% supposed to insert them
00:49:58
all on their back. I mean, it's hot.
00:50:00
Supposed to look, these are cooking guide tongs.
00:50:02
Supposed to do this.
00:50:04
They even say made to cook.
00:50:05
They're so weird. Like, what is it? You know, that's stupid.
00:50:08
That's like.
00:50:08
And I have a long handle.
00:50:09
You use that for items that are too small to fall through that we want, you know,
00:50:14
like they're going to be small enough to fall through.
00:50:15
The great chicken is going to go over here and or
00:50:18
we want to pull the heat on the same grill cooking chicken.
00:50:22
How do you how you can join the heat.
00:50:23
It's it's right there. You're just cooking chicken now.
00:50:25
You're taking it off a little bit I don't know, 75
00:50:28
I've never cooked jalapenos on my jalapenos.
00:50:31
I have to be salt burned it.
00:50:33
That's what you want a bunch of them.
00:50:34
Whatever that is. Version little char that.
00:50:37
No, no, you didn't say char.
00:50:38
He just said that a bunch of that that.
00:50:41
Well, he's not for the rodeo.
00:50:42
That is what you want.
00:50:44
And then we'll flip them onto their bellies.
00:50:46
Well, chicken thigh doesn't have a how long?
00:50:48
17, 18 minutes on each side.
00:50:50
So like a crazy person, chicken doesn't have belly or bad nails.
00:50:54
A test that's way too long over here. Can I show you this?
00:50:58
To see how the liquids evaporated.
00:51:01
It's only been about seven eight minutes, so another.
00:51:03
I'm really sad that Ryan's not watching anymore.
00:51:06
Or he's just like, you know, that's cool. Seeing spitefully.
00:51:08
No commenting.
00:51:09
He's like, I want I'm not going to act like I'm not watching.
00:51:11
Get more worried. Yeah.
00:51:12
Oh he's he's done a night shift anymore and he's know like
00:51:16
we're all going to be fine sleeping platinum a bit.
00:51:18
When I saw how depressed
00:51:19
some people were bringing me toast, I would think to myself,
00:51:22
at least Ryan's watching, so I'll clean it up.
00:51:24
Yeah, just flattening him out a bit
00:51:28
so it cooks a little more evenly.
00:51:30
That's going to be great.
00:51:31
You know, I'm storing that, but it looks like a really gnarly piece of chicken.
00:51:35
You couldn't do that to a breast, could you, Max.
00:51:38
Oh it's not a breast size like great.
00:51:40
I think I'm okay with this level of I don't know what the fuck it is.
00:51:43
Take them off. Let them. Cool. I should have listened.
00:51:46
And that's all right.
00:51:46
Well, it's some kind of chicken shit. Everything together.
00:51:49
You ever think to yourself that you want to do this off?
00:51:51
You peel the skin off. You know what I say to that?
00:51:53
Oh, yeah, I wish, I wish every I wish every fucking place would do that, man.
00:51:58
I'm singing paper on my subs.
00:51:59
Smoking is right here.
00:52:00
I would chop them up fairly fine so somebody doesn't get like a big paper
00:52:04
of this, you know. Oh, yeah. The skin is some kind of.
00:52:06
Some of the peppers tastes like fucking paper or the skin of an onion.
00:52:09
If you don't peel it enough, your bowl should be pretty obvious.
00:52:12
I don't know, it'll stay in there. It'll fucking stick.
00:52:15
You don't need peppers and onions enough.
00:52:17
No, no.
00:52:18
Well, for it's a weird thing to hear.
00:52:20
We're going to follow up with some sweet food and some smoke.
00:52:24
Yeah, because smoke. Good sweet sandwiches.
00:52:27
And then remember this business due to the steak subs.
00:52:31
What do you put on a steak sub if you don't like peppers and onions?
00:52:33
Of course. Because if it wasn't, I couldn't do that.
00:52:35
I don't eat a steak sub, I just eat steak.
00:52:37
And when you're macha mushrooms, do you like a steak sub?
00:52:41
That's, You should try amazing mushrooms on there.
00:52:44
All right.
00:52:45
Anybody? Why would you eat a steak sub?
00:52:47
There's so many reasons to me.
00:52:49
A steak sub used to be like the hangover cure back in the day.
00:52:55
Let's make this happen.
00:52:56
First. Some a little butter, then.
00:52:59
See, we just skipping right past the toast part I almost did
00:53:02
probably get for regular.
00:53:03
Why does that look like tuna fish? What just happened now?
00:53:06
Just building like this.
00:53:07
The even with your work.
00:53:09
Oh, it's chicken salad.
00:53:11
Oh, I should have watched this one first.
00:53:14
You know it's coming. It's going to be insane.
00:53:16
Okay, I know there's a hole there. That's okay.
00:53:18
That's called rustic and that's a why is that okay now, Mayo.
00:53:22
And are you putting it on top?
00:53:24
That makes it real hard to hold, doesn't it?
00:53:26
I mean, I understand what you're doing here.
00:53:28
I think he's ever had a he's going to flip it over.
00:53:30
I think you can pick it up and put it on the flat top without ruining yourself.
00:53:32
Do it.
00:53:33
Oh he's going to cook it one, three, two.
00:53:36
And that was more butter, right?
00:53:37
He's making toast.
00:53:38
Look, it's going to fall all over the place.
00:53:39
It was very until.
00:53:41
Because if you want to give it a little love like that,
00:53:43
you don't want a handful of mayo.
00:53:45
You don't want a fistful of mayo.
00:53:46
Sounds like a, a kung fu movie.
00:53:48
Fistful of Mayo. Sounds like,
00:53:52
Fistful of Mayo.
00:53:53
Sounds like
00:53:56
this fucking full of mayo.
00:53:57
Sounds like I'm going to take a bath.
00:53:59
Okay, okay, but go for it.
00:54:18
I. Know.
00:54:24
In your world, it's just not this time,
00:54:29
right?
00:54:31
Come on. Come on.
00:54:33
Okay.
00:54:35
But she. You.
00:54:40
Oh, yeah.
00:54:41
You like nasty, don't you.
00:54:44
Oh, I do, I do.
00:54:45
I'm sorry. Guilty as charged.
00:54:48
So big hurts I know I can't help it.
00:54:51
Oh, yeah.
00:54:53
Give it to me, daddy. Give it to me, daddy.
00:54:55
Give it to me!
00:54:56
Daddy!
00:54:59
Heaven.
00:54:59
What the fuck?
00:55:01
You're opening doors now, honey.
00:55:03
I saw a monster.
00:55:04
A what?
00:55:05
Stick your finger in my asshole, Oh.
00:55:10
Sandwich in the world.
00:55:12
It's called the quintessential grilled.
00:55:14
This is the most expensive sandwich in the world.
00:55:18
It's called the quintessential grilled cheese.
00:55:21
And if you want a taste, you'll have to fork over 200.
00:55:24
And I tried to find the website to order one, but I was not able to locate it.
00:55:28
So I don't know if this is real because I is making all kinds of shit now.
00:55:34
14 right here,
00:55:35
I try to find this 48 hours notice the serendipity Restaurant in New York.
00:55:40
If you can find that, please post the link in the comment.
00:55:42
I would like to order one of these $214 gold dipped
00:55:47
I don't understand.
00:55:48
I mean, gold is the thing that looks good and aliens and the whole bit, right?
00:55:51
The whole story right?
00:55:53
Does it taste good?
00:55:57
I think there's this whole gold leaf thing
00:55:59
that I see, like with paper gold Slugger
00:56:02
beer.
00:56:03
Yeah, there's liquors with gold flake in it and shit.
00:56:05
That just is a gimmick.
00:56:08
Bucks.
00:56:08
I think it's worth it. I mean, it has the best heat.
00:56:11
I mean, eating gold.
00:56:12
The other could be like, it's a mineral.
00:56:14
I mean, he thinks it's worth it.
00:56:16
The guy that makes it and gets the $214.
00:56:19
Cause it's worth it for him.
00:56:22
Brilliance in the world.
00:56:23
The cheesy indulgence can be found at New York's famed serendipity three.
00:56:28
This bread is baked with oh, serendipity 323 karat gold
00:56:33
throughout, and forget plain old cheese if you put champagne.
00:56:36
Tastes like bread with doesn't taste like anything, though echo.
00:56:41
And it's imported from the gold.
00:56:43
Delicious rare cheese are placed inside that golden, bubbly laced French bread
00:56:49
and then brushed with a mix of a lot of cheese and edible oils,
00:56:53
of course, is delicious in the butter and butter and cheese, of course.
00:56:57
This thing's delicious for a minute.
00:56:58
Melt down in the panini press, and then this $2 oven,
00:57:02
right once you smash it all together.
00:57:04
And that is George Foreman grill Sam.
00:57:06
He puts all these ingredients for $240, makes it in a George Foreman grill.
00:57:12
It just seems like,
00:57:16
well,
00:57:17
this isn't a this isn't a sandwich, but, or any toast.
00:57:20
But, I mean, you kind of toast the pizza, but,
00:57:21
how do you how do you feel about this?
00:57:27
I've seen shit like this.
00:57:29
I know.
00:57:31
Yeah, we don't need to play the music.
00:57:33
Yeah. It's ranch.
00:57:36
You go to that ranch, they're going to ranch.
00:57:39
They're going to deep fried.
00:57:39
It's not ranch, it's ranch.
00:57:42
Shut up.
00:57:43
What? That's wrong. It's dressing.
00:57:46
My daughter would love that.
00:57:48
Dipping a giant piece in a bucket of ranch.
00:57:50
You know, she was in today. She was.
00:57:52
She had a piece of pizza and she had chopped.
00:57:54
She was chopping up pickles.
00:57:55
She did it herself.
00:57:57
Put the pickles on the pizza and then dipped it in the ranch.
00:58:01
I was concerned she was pregnant, but she didn't know what that meant either.
00:58:04
What if that was, like, pancake batter in there?
00:58:08
That's like. Absolutely. I thought that's what they're gonna do about that. They're
00:58:12
right.
00:58:12
There's a cheeseburger, some sirup on it.
00:58:14
There's a deep fried cheeseburger somewhere around here that I had to.
00:58:18
Okay, but I heard on the radio
00:58:20
and they were asking, do they just take the deep
00:58:21
fried patty and put it in and then put it in the bun?
00:58:23
Or do they take the whole thing?
00:58:24
And he's like, no, they take the whole fucking thing,
00:58:27
batter it up in deep fried cheeseburger.
00:58:29
You know, you know, they should do they should after they take this
00:58:33
pizza slice of pizza in Dividend Ranch, they should then take that slice of pizza
00:58:37
and then make a pizza out of it.
00:58:41
Or cut it in a circle,
00:58:45
make a pizza out of it,
00:58:48
dude.
00:58:48
So even if you like pizza and ranch, I need you to comment.
00:58:51
That's too much ranch, right? I mean, they just.
00:58:53
And they ruined the bucket of ranch.
00:58:58
No. See you.
00:59:00
What you do is that that's, pancake batter.
00:59:03
You then, skillet that, then you dip it in ranch,
00:59:08
then you put a pizza on top of it one more time, meaning you.
00:59:13
You add once again, sauce,
00:59:16
cheese, pepperoni, and then you bake it.
00:59:20
I'll be okay with that.
00:59:21
Just no ranch.
00:59:22
Just, And maybe not pancake batter.
00:59:25
I'd like a nice egg wash.
00:59:27
Breadcrumb. I like the crispier.
00:59:30
It's like this.
00:59:31
Advertisement I think I brought it up.
00:59:32
Play it one more time.
00:59:34
I had to hit that circle button one more time.
00:59:36
Yeah. You just.
00:59:36
We can just let it. Be.
00:59:48
The, this burger place that was doing some kind of competition
00:59:51
where you, you pay, like, $30 or $40 and you get, like,
00:59:56
this huge stack of burger, you get a milkshake, and,
01:00:03
fucking some else.
01:00:04
Never get. Why? Well, you got a bunch of,
01:00:07
fries with, like, a pound of cheese like, on it.
01:00:10
And if you ate it in the time you're eating within a certain
01:00:14
under a certain time,
01:00:16
and it's all like, thick shit that you're never going to get through.
01:00:19
And so the reward of doing that is just your meal for free.
01:00:23
So at best you get like $30.
01:00:26
It's a waste wasted real two because you're only digesting a tiny bit of that.
01:00:29
Yeah. You're not even enjoying it.
01:00:31
You know the hell the shit.
01:00:32
The next day, expensive.
01:00:34
And I guess the free shit. It's expensive for the restaurant.
01:00:37
It's just not worth it. I would just take my time and say, fuck it,
01:00:41
but, yeah, it's just like that.
01:00:42
How many people?
01:00:43
They're, like, trying to murder people by making it a competition.
01:00:51
Yeah. No.
01:00:51
So, somebody to clear this, I was I'm still watching this on my side screen.
01:00:55
But, you know, like that, not that long.
01:01:02
No, I don't like that.
01:01:04
We're doing sandwiches, man.
01:01:05
That's. There's no there's no toast.
01:01:07
You wouldn't consider a pizza.
01:01:09
It's got to be between two slices of bread and over.
01:01:12
This is where we're getting back to.
01:01:14
Our hot dog is not the correct tool for the job.
01:01:16
Instead, you should use a screwdriver.
01:01:20
Did you know when making a grilled
01:01:22
cheese sandwich, you should not use a can of Heineken to flip it over.
01:01:25
This is because the Heineken can is not the correct tool for the job.
01:01:30
Instead, you should use a screwdriver.
01:01:33
Did. I think this is like the most on topic.
01:01:42
We've stayed in quite a while.
01:01:46
Cheers.
01:01:46
You would you would think that this is a fake story,
01:01:48
but this comes straight from CBS news, right?
01:01:53
CBS news.
01:01:56
Buttered toast becomes weapon of choice.
01:01:57
Invite them to SUV says South Carolina police.
01:02:01
This, this this reads like a fucking joke.
01:02:03
Like it's ridiculous.
01:02:04
Go to the stupid,
01:02:07
Christopher Brannon of Union, South Carolina, arrested Saturday
01:02:10
after a neighbor accused him of of smearing buttered toast on her SUV.
01:02:15
And of course, they throwing a joke. What?
01:02:18
No hash browns with that?
01:02:19
Don't just report the story. Don't be a comedian.
01:02:22
Well, you need to tell me, Sheriff.
01:02:23
Deputies say that. Yeah, that's not funny.
01:02:27
Union County sheriff's deputies
01:02:28
say the 34 year old Brandon is charged with malicious damage to property.
01:02:33
Authorities say the woman reported seeing Brandon wiping something on the back
01:02:36
windshield of her SUV.
01:02:38
The woman found a greasy film on the glass
01:02:39
and a piece of buttered toast on the ground nearby.
01:02:42
Brandon was arrested and released from jail on a personal recording,
01:02:48
working. And.
01:02:57
Do you need some help to carry your errands?
01:03:01
You can't even go carry
01:03:04
Reconnaissance Band, which is,
01:03:09
personal cognizance bond.
01:03:10
Yeah, that means there's no money involved.
01:03:12
It's just like, hey, on your honor, you do your duty.
01:03:14
Do your best to come back here and take responsibility for what the fuck you did.
01:03:18
And they say, yes, please.
01:03:20
Damage to the SUV was estimated at $1.
01:03:23
A sheriff's report did not mention a motive.
01:03:27
The reads like a fake story.
01:03:28
But then you go back up and it's like, no, this is CBS news.
01:03:31
Do all I can say is rubbing toast, butter on a fucking car or what?
01:03:35
Sorry. You want to jump right to that? And I got something.
01:03:37
No, I was no, I just jumped up showing.
01:03:39
That is legit CBS news. I don't know what the fuck.
01:03:42
What would happen if you're going to vandalize a car?
01:03:44
Butter is much better than this lady.
01:03:45
We showed on the last show.
01:03:47
I know she's officially.
01:03:51
Oh, yeah.
01:03:52
I mean, that may have been bug, but it is very yellow.
01:03:57
Whoa!
01:04:00
Oh my God,
01:04:03
what?
01:04:05
You're a slut, right?
01:04:07
That's right. Slut.
01:04:08
No, that's not what a slut does.
01:04:10
I don't think you said that right. You.
01:04:16
How about an anal gusher?
01:04:18
That's good.
01:04:19
It's like
01:04:20
I can hear what you're trying to do there, but it's more embarrassing for you.
01:04:24
Oh, wait.
01:04:25
Maybe that's an Asian man's come and then she is a slut.
01:04:28
They went up her ass, and then she spit it out.
01:04:29
She was just holding the cum. She. It's not.
01:04:32
This is the thing. That's a flexi thing.
01:04:34
It's like, look how crazy I am or definitely have the guts to shoot.
01:04:37
Do you think that's a that's a flex.
01:04:40
I want to shit all over your cars.
01:04:41
They have to clean it up like a malicious.
01:04:43
Like.
01:04:47
Back windshield grease on the back windshield was a windshield.
01:04:51
And the buttered bread is.
01:04:53
That would just. It'd be.
01:04:54
That'd be kind of a cool prank. I would never recommend this.
01:04:56
I've never done this. Please don't do this.
01:04:58
But if you just put a tiny bit of grease or Vaseline on somebody's
01:05:00
windshield wiper, it's a fucking nightmare.
01:05:04
Why would you do that?
01:05:05
Why would you tell anyone to do that?
01:05:07
I didn't, I told you not to do that.
01:05:12
So if you do it, it's on your own accord.
01:05:13
Do not do that.
01:05:16
Oh! I'm sorry. Don't do it.
01:05:17
Don't shit on somebody's car either.
01:05:19
If you have to say that it's society.
01:05:20
Maybe it's time I want to leave society.
01:05:27
But I don't
01:05:28
I don't I don't want to use society. I'm.
01:05:31
If I leave now, it's not of my own accord.
01:05:35
Well, what if you were to.
01:05:37
You wouldn't mind. Leave me.
01:05:38
What have you, What if.
01:05:40
What if you could leave society but still be, like, around?
01:05:43
Sort of.
01:05:46
Kind of like,
01:05:47
these kind of like this, Damn it.
01:05:50
There.
01:05:51
You got it.
01:05:51
Because, dude, your Segway was perfect for my shit.
01:05:54
What was it?
01:05:55
Will you be pleased that you'll be able to move in?
01:05:58
No, but mine is just as morbid in a similar direction
01:06:02
on the day that Andre dies.
01:06:05
Will he be pleased that you'll be able to move in?
01:06:10
How old is she? 16.
01:06:11
Buying an apartment in Paris isn't cheap, but there's a quirky,
01:06:15
slightly morbid loophole that could land you on at half the price.
01:06:19
You're essentially betting on how much that is going to stick around.
01:06:24
It's known as the edging this year.
01:06:28
Say it with me, vagina.
01:06:30
Finally, buy a dream home in Paris.
01:06:32
After nearly a year of searching, she found a dirt
01:06:36
south facing place for half the price of the others.
01:06:39
And I think it's really well arranged for such a small apartment.
01:06:44
If exceptional.
01:06:45
This place is owned by Andre. It's a very.
01:06:48
It has no intention of moving out.
01:06:50
This exceptional one when I needed the place.
01:06:53
So this system. Wow.
01:06:55
There's a lot of apartments in that area.
01:06:57
Gary and Mike.
01:06:58
And get them on 15, 20 years by Andre is here with the line.
01:07:01
Leave him a single deposit in the range of €200,000.
01:07:06
Once they listed the Lyme disease, then I think that's a great deal.
01:07:10
He'll be gone quicker,
01:07:11
but in a typical period, a buyer pays an upfront sum
01:07:15
and then small monthly payments
01:07:17
to the seller who keeps living in the home until they die.
01:07:21
Brilliant.
01:07:21
Yeah, she's sales make up just 1% of the French property market.
01:07:26
Only 1%. And why are we going during Covid?
01:07:28
And it's not just locals rolling the dice.
01:07:31
More and more foreign buyers are getting in on the gamble too.
01:07:33
So all right,
01:07:35
does anyone realize what I realized when I saw the story and why I'm showing it?
01:07:41
No, you just gave a bunch of money.
01:07:43
You're gonna, like, fall off the balcony accidentally.
01:07:45
Oh, no.
01:07:48
That's all I was thinking. Do the only.
01:07:50
The only incentive that the person has is for the person's life to end all right?
01:07:55
And you keep paying for their house while they're alive.
01:07:59
Homie.
01:07:59
Ravel, an American Iranian, already has four fiancée homes for her kids.
01:08:04
She's. She's buying her face.
01:08:06
I think in the beginning, friends and family were like, oh, really?
01:08:08
You got involved with that? So she some of the proceeds.
01:08:11
Oh yeah, it's really easy, dude.
01:08:12
So you're selling it.
01:08:14
Why are you doing.
01:08:16
And then they're, they're going to that upfront for any of these people.
01:08:19
They're able to pay
01:08:20
for wherever they're living now and their future dwelling right here.
01:08:24
My dad.
01:08:24
So I really don't know how much we like.
01:08:26
How many years are we talking here?
01:08:28
Mainly for the kids. You get a 20 year mortgage. I mean,
01:08:32
look, it really is Gary.
01:08:36
It's very Gary.
01:08:37
It's a perfect Gary. It's a comfortable.
01:08:39
Yeah, like Gary's bro.
01:08:40
But it's quite a bit longer to sell, a little bit more.
01:08:43
You end up paying, then the discount starts to shrink there.
01:08:47
You get some here.
01:08:49
It is quite austere, my dad.
01:08:51
So I really don't worry about myself.
01:08:54
The gamble is mainly for, the owner.
01:08:57
It's all remarkably transitory.
01:08:59
It seems perfectly.
01:09:01
So quickly after I'm dead, I don't really care.
01:09:03
I lost the gamble.
01:09:04
But I have also one. Nice.
01:09:06
Nothing uneventful.
01:09:07
But in one instance, A was found guilty of involuntary manslaughter in a case
01:09:12
in Israel.
01:09:13
I see that.
01:09:14
And the death of an elderly cellmate.
01:09:15
Their life expectancy two.
01:09:18
Most cases are uneventful.
01:09:20
But in one instance, a boy was found guilty of involuntary manslaughter.
01:09:24
And in case Madeleine and the death of an elderly sailor
01:09:28
92 years old, nobody suspected a thing in the balcony.
01:09:31
Touch a person or a special type of view over a balcony in whatever.
01:09:36
No he didn't.
01:09:37
I just said that because that's what you said.
01:09:38
Oh, that's all you gotta do is like, I know it's whoever cares in
01:09:41
love for them.
01:09:42
Get the 92 year old should not assume to a balcony,
01:09:46
put a pillow over its face and go, oh, she felt she died in her sleep.
01:09:50
I've seen old people that were so old when I was when my mom was,
01:09:53
the person that I take care of my mom. Spoiler alert.
01:09:56
She was in a rehab facility, and there was way older people there.
01:09:59
Literally, like, why does drug addict.
01:10:02
What is. No, they're like, why does God hate me?
01:10:04
Why won't he let me go?
01:10:05
That's how most of them think and feel,
01:10:07
because I was like I was there for lots of long periods of time.
01:10:11
Did you tell them that? The reason is because.
01:10:14
Loser.
01:10:14
Coward.
01:10:16
No, I fucking can't.
01:10:19
I said you could call A15863
01:10:22
ranch three and talk to a very optimistic Christian person named Gary.
01:10:25
That'll help you out a lot for what's called free therapy.
01:10:29
Therapy.
01:10:31
Hint according to him, it's nothing.
01:10:37
But you're just not.
01:10:41
Or not?
01:10:44
Would you just not
01:10:46
that there's a video that I covered
01:10:48
in this fucking thing.
01:10:51
Do we have more sandwiches?
01:10:52
Are we going to close that?
01:10:53
Oh, wait. Yeah, there's more.
01:10:56
Sandwich.
01:10:57
I didn't bring any sandwiches to the party.
01:11:00
Is a burrito a sandwich?
01:11:04
I think it's a burrito.
01:11:06
Is it what.
01:11:07
It was a taco.
01:11:08
It's I mean is vagina.
01:11:13
You got that bread.
01:11:17
Vagina.
01:11:18
That's about as weird as you could go up against vagina
01:11:21
if it has a yeast infection, maybe.
01:11:25
But I don't want
01:11:26
to have anything to do with it.
01:11:30
Or sandwiches.
01:11:33
What about a gordita?
01:11:35
For dita?
01:11:36
It's called a gordita crunch.
01:11:39
I believe
01:11:41
the only the crunchy one.
01:11:43
This.
01:11:43
We're toast, of course,
01:11:44
because with Red delicious, evidence of flour dates back some 30,000. Yes.
01:11:47
I just like the people making flatbread spread that along with the staple food.
01:11:49
Many applications which we'll sometimes use over offering God's naked body.
01:11:52
Or if
01:11:53
it's like being original, if you read the results
01:11:57
from green droplets people to sustain a large population, people
01:11:58
the ability to learn too much about toast
01:12:01
Express and today was likely invented in a oh no shit.
01:12:04
The Egyptians learned that
01:12:06
if they left dough sitting out for a while, it would rise.
01:12:08
When baked, the bread would retain its risen shape.
01:12:11
This was, of course, due to yeast spores in the air finding their way to the dough.
01:12:16
The closed oven was invented in Egypt for the baking of Levin's bread by 3000
01:12:20
BC, and the workers who built the famous pyramids were often among the
01:12:24
sports industry.
01:12:25
You know, one of the.
01:12:26
This is Gary also, right? Right.
01:12:29
There was just one problem left out in the desert heat for longer.
01:12:32
There is a theme sophisticated British era tweaks, so be sure to do this I toast.
01:12:37
It's generally thought to be unique to this way
01:12:38
because of bread, rather than one of the breakfast
01:12:39
items in butter jam by scorching slices of bread that we already know
01:12:44
we learned from Gary.
01:12:45
In the beginning,
01:12:45
the toast began because they wanted wait, so the bread didn't get all soggy
01:12:49
because they were putting in to soak up poisons in.
01:12:52
Cheers.
01:12:53
So you.
01:12:54
Well, let me tell you something, brother.
01:12:56
Sorry.
01:12:57
You don't need to. The party on the.
01:13:00
The party on the high.
01:13:01
Brother.
01:13:03
So going back to him,
01:13:05
stories that may not seem real.
01:13:08
So, this is again the New York Post.
01:13:11
All stories.
01:13:12
Sick Pennsylvania parents made sun live shed allowed them inside
01:13:16
to shower once a week.
01:13:17
Report right.
01:13:20
It gets worse as the couple allege plenty whether he needed it or not.
01:13:25
Well, well, well, there's more that that involves.
01:13:28
That's much, much to ties. Honor this.
01:13:31
A Pennsylvania couple of allegedly forced their son
01:13:33
to live in an outdoor shed for the last several months,
01:13:36
and they were only busted after a depraved dad
01:13:40
nearly choked to choke the boy to death, cops said.
01:13:43
Oh, Bart Simpson, maybe they, can blame The Simpsons for Darlie.
01:13:48
That's a good name.
01:13:49
41 and Grace, sensing 42, kicked their 16 year old son
01:13:54
out of their reinholds home over what they called inappropriate behaviors,
01:13:58
making him live in a wooden shed on their rural property as punishment
01:14:02
since mid-March report last week, citing police,
01:14:06
the shed has no running water, which forced the boy
01:14:08
to relieve himself outdoors, and he was a hose to quench the thirst
01:14:12
with his parents, allowing him to shower indoors once per week, cops said.
01:14:16
The teen was forced to use money earned from his part
01:14:19
time job to pay for food and, quote, law and Crime reported,
01:14:23
citing the whatever the district that is police department.
01:14:28
This they've definitely seen this person before.
01:14:31
I feel like I've seen them before.
01:14:34
Really? Haven't you?
01:14:35
Yeah. No.
01:14:43
I don't want to get down on you, but,
01:14:46
This is Grace.
01:14:47
That's great.
01:14:48
Sensing her husband facing charges.
01:14:50
Yeah. So. Yeah.
01:14:52
So they, they made their kids live in some sweet ass shed.
01:14:57
And to be fair, my shit doesn't have some water.
01:15:00
What the fuck does the kid want?
01:15:02
Well, I mean, no running water.
01:15:03
He does it just because he has to relieve himself outside, like, okay, he's.
01:15:06
He has a purse outside. Okay, that's that's fine.
01:15:09
Sounds like something 16 year olds do.
01:15:11
I don't have electricity.
01:15:13
Sounds like something kids do.
01:15:16
Yeah, unless you're trying to get laid and maybe it's a problem,
01:15:19
but he's got his own shed, so it's like he has a spot to get laid.
01:15:22
Like he's got this cool hang out.
01:15:24
Like, what are you what? What's what?
01:15:27
These parents should be rewarded.
01:15:29
It's summer. Right?
01:15:30
I mean, it's it's not cold, isn't she?
01:15:32
They're big fan of the Simpsons.
01:15:37
Yeah.
01:15:37
Where is the shed?
01:15:38
Oh, there's, That's a huge fucking shed.
01:15:41
That's bigger than my house. That's not the shed.
01:15:43
I don't think that's shed. That's the house.
01:15:45
Kids complaints. All the pictures I see three.
01:15:47
So as a parent, though, I have to ask, is this just
01:15:50
daily routine, or did he do something?
01:15:54
So much so that the kids like, dude, if you burn down the if you burn
01:15:58
down the family room one more time, you're going to live in the shed.
01:16:01
Because what I learned when I took Christmas away one year as a parent,
01:16:04
no matter how crazy you sound, if you make a threat, you must abide by it.
01:16:09
Otherwise you you will lose all respect and power.
01:16:13
No, it's.
01:16:14
My wife tried to stop me. She's like, come here, come here. We talked.
01:16:16
She's like, you can't take away Christmas.
01:16:18
You can't take away something.
01:16:19
You can't actually, you know, follow through with.
01:16:21
And I said, the fucking hell, is this The Simpsons again?
01:16:24
Yeah. Simpsons. No, I didn't choke my kids or anything.
01:16:26
I'm just like, Christmas is not a fucking right.
01:16:29
I mean, there's no you can just go about your day and have nothing.
01:16:33
Change your attitude.
01:16:34
Don't allow to see the movie or whatever.
01:16:37
It's in scratchy movie. It wasn't allowed to see it.
01:16:40
Remember that I do.
01:16:42
Officers from the EPMD police showed up.
01:16:46
It's EPD, but EPMD sounds better.
01:16:48
Showed up to the Lancaster County House last weekend
01:16:52
when the boy called 901 and his dad, who allegedly attacked him when he refused
01:16:56
to go for the decrepit, doesn't have running water.
01:16:58
Everybody has a cell phone.
01:17:01
The kids got everything.
01:17:02
How do you know it's a cell phone?
01:17:03
Maybe use the landline?
01:17:06
Nope. Not now.
01:17:07
Daryl fencing tackled his son and throttled throttled him
01:17:10
with both hands after the argument that that afternoon
01:17:14
he wouldn't go back to his decrepit digs.
01:17:19
What the fuck does that mean?
01:17:20
I have no throttle, throttle or straddle.
01:17:23
I don't know, he's like, I don't, I don't, I don't.
01:17:28
Always see is this looks kind of nice.
01:17:32
Yeah.
01:17:33
I don't know.
01:17:34
We don't know what to make of it.
01:17:37
We should show him this show to
01:17:41
where it wasn't going.
01:17:43
Go, go make it. Go do it.
01:17:45
So that's exactly what I got started on growing up.
01:17:48
I loved having fresh bread.
01:17:50
It was one of my favorite things.
01:17:51
So I get it started by making this is so peaceful.
01:17:54
Nice. So she making her own bread.
01:17:56
I hope the guy in the shed is watching this.
01:17:58
This is hash formed and then she's sleeping
01:18:01
for about two hours until it doubled in size.
01:18:04
I started on my raspberry jam.
01:18:05
She sounds like she's leaving. She looks like she's leaving.
01:18:08
She looks like somebody smacked her across the eyes of you.
01:18:10
When you have young children,
01:18:11
you're supposed to talk in a nice, welcoming, calming, almost hypnotic tone.
01:18:15
So it's supposed to look like scare them or get over sensory.
01:18:18
Because babies are very toddlers too, so.
01:18:22
Well,
01:18:22
you made all that for one little scoop today because the jelly would be, sweet
01:18:26
by this time, my friend.
01:18:27
Now, is rather.
01:18:29
Hey, now, this time the bread is risen.
01:18:31
That's good.
01:18:32
She's efficient.
01:18:33
Then. Oh, she just punch it.
01:18:35
Fuck yeah, she did. She fisted it.
01:18:37
I'm afraid of this, lady.
01:18:38
Do you hear me? Make fun of her face is.
01:18:40
She's a motherfucker.
01:18:41
I think she's a girl.
01:18:42
She's pregnant with another.
01:18:43
He's like a she's a robot.
01:18:45
She's a so perfectly.
01:18:48
She's the kind of one that lays in bed. Goes her. Yep.
01:18:50
Get it over with and wait.
01:18:51
So I definitely sliced it a little too early.
01:18:54
My daughter is very efficient.
01:18:55
Sex gets in the way of making.
01:18:57
Oh, she cut the crust. Wait a minute.
01:18:59
Peanut butter and jelly. Cut it diagonally.
01:19:01
I would have just taken some.
01:19:03
Ended up having whatever I want, but shit together without doing all the.
01:19:07
Oh, and she gives it to her kid.
01:19:08
You fucking would spoil that piece of shit.
01:19:11
No, I'm just saying doing that. His live in a shed.
01:19:14
Some kids get homemade bread on fucking crusted on crusted
01:19:17
peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
01:19:18
I guess we're all dealt different hands in life.
01:19:20
I don't know, they look.
01:19:21
They look the of a certain demographic.
01:19:23
So it's incredible that they're able to manage as I thought they were all poor.
01:19:30
But I thought none of them
01:19:31
were allowed to be successful.
01:19:36
Don't know what Gary's talking about, but that's okay.
01:19:39
We need to know that there's some, Rachel Riggins, later
01:19:43
for, later that show later?
01:19:46
Yeah. There's some Rachel Riggins updates.
01:19:48
Exciting, exciting news.
01:19:49
We that we if you if you've been paying attention to the show,
01:19:53
it's been going on a certain direction.
01:19:55
And, she succeeds on what she wants to do.
01:19:57
She's going to make a sandwich.
01:20:00
Oh, she's going to make a sandwich.
01:20:02
I hope she never makes a fucking sandwich.
01:20:04
Oh, my Lord, we can watch her do the egg thing again with her nubs
01:20:09
and get the eggs all over bandages, and then continue to make food with raw egg.
01:20:14
Meanwhile, we make a sandwich. No.
01:20:17
Well, maybe.
01:20:20
Well, I mean, yes.
01:20:23
Because they wanted to make a sandwich.
01:20:29
Toast.
01:20:30
Nice.
01:20:30
Nice tie. And.
01:20:36
Hit, though.
01:20:37
What is that going to do?
01:20:38
Oh, maybe you're going to, like, warm up the licorice.
01:20:42
What's happening?
01:20:42
I should, like, grill the.
01:20:44
Wait, how
01:20:46
are you going to.
01:20:49
I'll just wait.
01:20:50
You know what she's doing.
01:20:51
Okay. That little lifts up in one.
01:20:53
What's the whole point of.
01:20:57
He's going to have hot pickles
01:20:58
instead of, like, fried pickles?
01:21:02
Oh, like some char on those pickles.
01:21:03
If you're going to put them on the skillet.
01:21:07
She puts on really nice dresses to cook right.
01:21:11
You don't
01:21:13
think you're
01:21:15
right?
01:21:16
I don't know.
01:21:20
But if she doesn't have a man,
01:21:21
she's annoying. Is.
01:21:25
Well, I got, like, five or so many.
01:21:28
All my a lot of my chicken. More sandwiches.
01:21:30
I got more sandwiches.
01:21:31
Jesus Christ, the whole show. Sandwiches.
01:21:35
Stay hungry, or you make your sandwich only for sandwiches.
01:21:38
What is it with your 6 or 5 sandwiches? Two bits.
01:21:44
Did you hit it?
01:21:45
Did you find it? I uploaded it down there.
01:21:47
He found it, I saw it, yeah.
01:21:48
Did you not just,
01:21:51
There's other ways to do that.
01:21:52
I have a crossover, too.
01:21:54
I have fucking crossovers.
01:21:55
This is an amazing show.
01:21:57
This is the best show ever.
01:21:59
I'm not even sure what to do next.
01:22:01
There's so much to do.
01:22:02
We could do that.
01:22:02
I got just one more regular sandwich, and then we'll crossover.
01:22:05
That'll be perfect.
01:22:06
We're going to cross over to the other side.
01:22:08
We're going to run a of ourselves live on
01:22:11
no seat crossover mix implies that we're going over to rumble.
01:22:13
We're no we're not.
01:22:14
We're going to crossover from sandwiches to sing over.
01:22:16
Who is that?
01:22:17
James crossing over with fucking, Edward?
01:22:20
James. James.
01:22:21
What was that? Fucking James Earl Jones?
01:22:24
No, these are that these are real fake psychic
01:22:27
Jesus guy that like that thought he was
01:22:31
doing
01:22:31
psychic talking to your dead people in front of, like.
01:22:34
Yeah. What is that?
01:22:35
What's the first thing you notice here?
01:22:38
That that's like a wax figure
01:22:41
trying to put the butter on each side of the bread
01:22:45
because the alien aliens are real.
01:22:48
Yeah.
01:22:48
I mean, I don't know why you would, but this isn't a good perspective.
01:22:52
Oh, you are there, bro.
01:22:55
It's because she dies.
01:22:55
Her hair really dark, but she didn't die.
01:22:57
Right side down in her pan, going to buy blond peppers and some pepper and Chinese.
01:23:03
Everybody's put the peppers up.
01:23:04
I'm going to mix up some arugula or olive oil.
01:23:07
What is a regular a little squeeze of lemon.
01:23:10
It's like a lettuce.
01:23:12
Thanks. I can see that.
01:23:13
It's a leafy. Yeah.
01:23:16
It's like a green rose.
01:23:17
Rose. And people can chop it up.
01:23:20
It doesn't really have much like a low end flavor.
01:23:23
It's like.
01:23:24
Just like what that is.
01:23:25
Nicola was the purple and and, green lettuce.
01:23:28
There was a little sandwich.
01:23:29
No, see, there's like, different kinds of, cabbage and shit.
01:23:32
I think that's what you do.
01:23:34
That looks like the prepackaged, all meat
01:23:38
and our
01:23:39
regular, you know, prepackaged me kind of birthday.
01:23:42
One side, I like my meat to be free range, not packaged.
01:23:47
Delicious.
01:23:48
Loaded. Delicious.
01:23:51
There's something like notice, the weirder or less hard the woman is.
01:23:57
Seems like the better the sandwiches are getting.
01:23:59
You think so?
01:24:00
Yeah.
01:24:00
I'm thinking that the real hot women are trying harder.
01:24:03
They're thinking people are just looking at their tits instead of the sandwich.
01:24:05
Now I want to up the game.
01:24:06
I want to see some fucking sandwiches and some tits.
01:24:08
Can we do that?
01:24:10
Stay hungry or you make your sandwich. Oh.
01:24:14
Be nice.
01:24:15
If there was a woman with both.
01:24:17
Right. Wait, what sandwich?
01:24:18
Isn't it the ability to make sandwiches and the ability to make tits?
01:24:24
Yeah. I think every woman is.
01:24:26
Should be capable of doing that.
01:24:28
Unless your uterus is dried out
01:24:30
or your.
01:24:31
Then you can just make sandwiches.
01:24:35
Yeah.
01:24:37
Carry sandwich contribution.
01:24:38
Here it comes.
01:24:39
I don't know what I don't understand.
01:24:41
So this is, toast. Right.
01:24:42
So this is the actual definition of toast.
01:24:45
Toast? Yeah.
01:24:46
Sliced bread made warm, crisp equals hard enough to break.
01:24:49
Not necessarily.
01:24:51
Right. Like what's what.
01:24:52
There's there's levels. There's a dial.
01:24:54
Yeah. There's a dial to change that answer.
01:24:57
And Brown by being put in here a a high heat.
01:25:02
Why you gotta go color being put near a high heat.
01:25:09
These are,
01:25:09
some examples as it was cold as it was a cold morning.
01:25:13
She stocked up on bacon.
01:25:15
She stocked up on bacon.
01:25:17
How do you stock up on bacon?
01:25:19
I still go up on some other shit.
01:25:21
Speaking of which.
01:25:25
I'm not sure.
01:25:27
Give me that much higher.
01:25:30
So high also.
01:25:34
00600.
01:25:38
We get much us.
01:25:41
Oh, I love.
01:25:46
No. Yes, yes.
01:25:49
Gotta start lower parts.
01:25:50
A pretty important part. Grace before is too high. Okay.
01:25:53
We have sinned against thee and are unworthy of mercy.
01:25:56
Pardon our sins and bless these mercies for you enough.
01:25:59
And help us to eat and drink to thy glory, for Christ's sake.
01:26:02
Amen.
01:26:04
I like to open the show with some blessing.
01:26:07
I wasn't sure I.
01:26:08
I was brought up by the prayer.
01:26:10
I talked through it.
01:26:12
I found it,
01:26:14
she spread her
01:26:17
wings and spread it.
01:26:18
Where did she spread the butter?
01:26:23
There's no sound that's got to so.
01:26:27
Oh, wait, there's sound.
01:26:31
Hold up.
01:26:33
Oh, that got.
01:26:43
You don't put the handle songs you.
01:26:45
It was funny.
01:26:46
What you do if you send someone is going to have them both for.
01:26:55
Oh, no, oh no, oh no.
01:26:58
I wasn't meant to handle certain either.
01:27:02
So since,
01:27:05
it was just filled with actual.
01:27:09
Sounds.
01:27:11
That was your oven.
01:27:11
So hot.
01:27:14
I was like, okay,
01:27:17
why do people screaming?
01:27:21
Oh, I don't ever leave your dishwasher door.
01:27:24
I, I see that guy. I feel bad for it.
01:27:26
He's the only one who didn't bring this upon himself.
01:27:29
You should.
01:27:32
Maybe those people too.
01:27:33
I don't know what the fuck that was, but, look like wine bag or something.
01:27:39
Never forget this lady.
01:27:47
Never forget her. Who?
01:27:52
Okay. Here's this.
01:27:52
Here's the sandwich crossover.
01:27:56
And I also order the sandwich side as
01:28:00
well.
01:28:03
Pots are pretty important part.
01:28:07
Just graduated
01:28:08
high school and is 18 years old.
01:28:11
Gotta start lower so you can get up there.
01:28:18
You know?
01:28:19
Here it is.
01:28:22
Do you happen to have a,
01:28:25
Rube Goldberg bumper?
01:28:28
I don't know if.
01:28:29
I don't know if I made one.
01:28:33
It should be right next to your sandwiches.
01:28:37
Yeah. And, Oh,
01:28:39
they'd be like, oh, my God.
01:28:45
She's
01:28:47
so, so good.
01:28:48
Smashing in the windshield.
01:28:50
Like I'm worried about Monday.
01:28:54
I'm working on Monday, too.
01:28:55
I don't get it, but I'll play along with it.
01:28:57
What do you mean you don't get it?
01:28:58
Well, just because Gary, Gary said Rube Goldberg,
01:29:03
and you heard he's, like, posted a Rube Goldberg.
01:29:05
And I'm like, yeah, what is this, like, elementary school?
01:29:07
Like, yeah, I remember when we like, we're fascinated with these
01:29:11
in in fucking, you know, second grade.
01:29:14
Yeah.
01:29:15
Gary is like, dude.
01:29:17
So continued Goldberg.
01:29:19
And so that number one and then he mentioned Goldberg bumper
01:29:23
and so I decided to make my
01:29:28
work go, oh.
01:29:33
Please.
01:29:34
I like that shit in the windshield.
01:29:39
I it over and,
01:29:44
you know, fancy pants.
01:29:45
And he thinks he's better than the rest of us.
01:29:47
And, Gary's in that limo, and Goldberg's trying to get
01:29:51
Goldberg kind of representing us, and.
01:29:53
Yeah, we're just trying to get out of that limo, and he's
01:29:57
just smashing the shit out of, the limo because he's very, very pissed at me.
01:30:02
I go, oh, my God, what?
01:30:08
Chase,
01:30:09
I saw something smashing in the windshield
01:30:12
with my, I'm worried about Monday.
01:30:16
So. Story story behind this.
01:30:18
I don't think that's what the butter, by the way,
01:30:21
they shot this in WCW.
01:30:24
They'd be like, go windshield.
01:30:28
And it's the first two hits.
01:30:29
He drops it, and so he just goes, you know what?
01:30:31
Well, I don't want to, like, look stupid by,
01:30:33
like, bending down and picking this thing back up.
01:30:35
So I'm just going to break the next window with my
01:30:39
and be like, oh my God, what?
01:30:45
She's I so smashing in the windshield.
01:30:51
I'm worried about Monday.
01:30:53
Yeah.
01:30:55
It was very controversial because,
01:30:56
you know, getting 199 stitches and lost a lot of blood, and,
01:30:59
everyone was pissed off that, he did that.
01:31:02
And then I like that they're worried about Monday.
01:31:05
Yeah, that's the.
01:31:06
That's one of my favorite parts. I'm worried about Monday. Do.
01:31:08
But, Yeah.
01:31:09
Continue the, Goldberg here room.
01:31:12
Rude. Goldberg.
01:31:15
They had a little bit left.
01:31:16
No, that was it. The toast on the wall.
01:31:18
That was it, I think. I think it failed. Oh, look.
01:31:20
Yeah, it missed the toe.
01:31:21
The bread is.
01:31:21
The butter's all smushed up in one spot.
01:31:24
Well, I've got one thing.
01:31:26
The cap on the Goldberg.
01:31:30
He beat me to it.
01:31:31
Yeah.
01:31:31
One thing to cap on the Goldberg segment.
01:31:34
Dammit.
01:31:35
Where's the audio?
01:31:37
What do you do? This one there.
01:31:38
Right there.
01:31:39
Yeah, way up there. Okay. Are you.
01:31:42
Hey, you can also say that Apple Keyboard.
01:31:46
You can feel Goldberg, the Bill Goldberg against Bill Goldberg,
01:31:51
whether Bill Goldberg likes you or not to good old Bill Goldberg to Bill Goldberg.
01:31:56
So will Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg,
01:32:00
give Bill Goldberg go, go, Bill Goldberg the bill.
01:32:03
I've been Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, the Bill.
01:32:07
Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg,
01:32:11
the Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, the Goldberg, Bill
01:32:15
Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, Bill Goldberg, the words make no sense.
01:32:20
William Goldberg, who
01:32:24
Bill Goldberg,
01:32:26
William Goldberg, who
01:32:29
I don't know who got.
01:32:32
Who long, long time ago then, right.
01:32:36
What was that?
01:32:39
The Bill Goldberg journey of a bill
01:32:41
in the hand now.
01:32:44
But it makes no sense.
01:32:46
Just. Oh, it's a Bill Goldberg involving toes.
01:32:48
There's no way those are fake toaster toast pieces.
01:32:51
They're, like, made out of the channels on this, guys.
01:32:55
There's two popping up at the same time.
01:32:56
And it's because the whole existence is Rube Goldberg machine.
01:33:00
Rube root Goldberg machine that sucks.
01:33:06
So they're definitely worked out and practiced.
01:33:11
Yeah.
01:33:13
It's great.
01:33:14
He's making this for children.
01:33:16
When children go start to discover the room Goldberg's in Second Day.
01:33:20
Thanks for watching.
01:33:21
I'm a child.
01:33:22
He's also he's also allegedly, you know, potentially touching children.
01:33:26
There's new machines.
01:33:28
You can subscribe to the channel by clicking Predator Vibes.
01:33:30
I don't know what the button under the video, probably because loser.
01:33:34
Fucking coward coward Cup loser.
01:33:39
Yeah.
01:33:54
We're seriously to do another miracle.
01:33:56
That's.
01:33:56
He posted this.
01:33:57
Many of them.
01:34:00
I assume you did not bring these to the table.
01:34:02
He posted these, right? Like.
01:34:05
Or did you? Did you find these?
01:34:07
Are these your.
01:34:08
You try to bring ones that actually are good.
01:34:12
Or is this.
01:34:13
That's that's amazing. Just just wait. Hold on.
01:34:16
Wait for it.
01:34:16
Did you bring you brought that sim table?
01:34:18
That's why you're not saying
01:34:21
oh sorry you Muted what.
01:34:24
Yeah yeah dude that was that was awesome.
01:34:26
The bot shook up from the fucking popcorn I was muted.
01:34:30
No I just didn't want to respond okay. Yeah.
01:34:32
If I go.
01:34:37
I don't like that he has to be able to pull with another slice.
01:34:39
There's no way. Then roll back. Right?
01:34:42
I don't like that he has to pull a thing though.
01:34:44
It make the machine pull the thing
01:34:48
like a
01:34:48
Rube Goldberg so she doesn't have five breaks.
01:34:52
But what is it? Six is.
01:34:54
Well, there's a mac that never happens in Mario.
01:34:57
There's a magnet there. You're supposed it's a one.
01:34:58
I never there's one.
01:34:59
Never. You don't stop those blocks.
01:35:01
You actually
01:35:03
you jump on them, you jump from underneath,
01:35:06
or he's got shitting heating in his house.
01:35:09
Right?
01:35:12
Sorry to see that.
01:35:22
You know, it's nice for each other.
01:35:27
Yeah, I've heard a creek about it before.
01:35:30
That was.
01:35:31
You know why, though?
01:35:32
Because he did it. He filmed it, and the regular
01:35:33
peanut butter just went through and stayed in a ball.
01:35:35
So he had to add some water and some.
01:35:39
And, Oh, no.
01:35:42
To to put rails on that bitch or he's a fucking genius.
01:35:46
And that was part of it.
01:35:50
Yeah,
01:35:52
definitely.
01:35:54
What the dog doing.
01:36:03
Because there's nothing on the table for the truck to react to.
01:36:06
That was definitely planned.
01:36:14
Why is there a giant penis?
01:36:19
As you're having the dog?
01:36:28
Nice cock.
01:36:28
Brady. No.
01:36:34
Yes. What was it like?
01:36:37
Yes, yes, that was weird.
01:36:40
There should be maybe some bugs.
01:36:42
I want to see more black cat.
01:36:46
This machine was dedicated to all the PBJ sandwich.
01:36:49
Like,
01:36:50
as somebody who makes even the shittiest, smallest contribution to content.
01:36:54
This is brilliant
01:36:55
because I always watch these YouTubers where they're at the end, they're like,
01:36:59
okay, the show's over for the next five minutes,
01:37:01
we're going to read
01:37:01
all our super supporters and blah blah, blah, and everyone just like turns it off.
01:37:05
This guy gets this little good little action going, well, he reads it
01:37:09
and we love him as much as I did.
01:37:10
And a huge thank you to my Patreon supporters.
01:37:13
Without your contributions, these videos would truly not be possible.
01:37:17
I'm going to read out some names.
01:37:18
Sorry for the terrible pronunciation.
01:37:20
Bob Stromberg I think it's.
01:37:24
Any other
01:37:25
connections that I've gotten with you on this?
01:37:28
Of course, I'm not going to contribute to slamming their face butter.
01:37:32
Then I want to say something because it's really doesn't matter.
01:37:36
I like not
01:37:40
this guy's great, though.
01:37:42
There's all kinds of rude Goldberg for children.
01:37:45
He makes a lot of cool videos for children.
01:37:48
So if you got any kids, ages.
01:37:52
3 to 4.
01:37:57
11. 12.
01:37:58
13. 14.
01:38:00
15. Yeah, we're going to we're going to end with this last rude Goldberg machine.
01:38:04
We're going to end we're going to end the rude Goldberg son.
01:38:09
We were done long time.
01:38:10
We're we're gonna keep going regardless.
01:38:12
This one epitomizes, women.
01:38:15
You're not going to take inches off my dick, bro.
01:38:21
This.
01:38:22
I think it's the right one.
01:38:26
There sound.
01:38:31
So first,
01:38:33
the Newton's cradle is going to stop.
01:38:37
Stop right there. Newton's cradle.
01:38:40
When you make Rube Goldberg
01:38:42
machine videos or Rube Goldberg videos, either one.
01:38:46
You don't start by explaining every step that's going to happen, right?
01:38:51
I mean, I say from not just every man, but every human on earth.
01:38:54
Fuck you bitch, listen to her.
01:38:56
She's like, okay, first.
01:38:58
So first, she's so proud of it that she's going to take a step by step
01:39:02
to what happens before we even do it.
01:39:03
The woman's, she has the woman's planet to us.
01:39:06
I have not watched the rest of this video, but I said as soon as I saw this,
01:39:09
well, she's weirdly, they would call it a man.
01:39:11
Whoever this woman is, I want to punch your. I want to punch.
01:39:13
You're in the fucking face.
01:39:15
Well, now, we don't condone that.
01:39:17
No, I'm not condoning it, but I would.
01:39:19
I'm going to do it.
01:39:20
But I will argue the fact that I've always heard it's never
01:39:23
okay to hit a woman, but catch you in the streets, motherfucker.
01:39:26
I'm gonna punch you if I catch your face.
01:39:29
So I have three kids, and my wife has killed two of them.
01:39:31
And I walk in the house in the middle of her killing.
01:39:33
The third one. Is it okay to hit her then?
01:39:36
No. Yes.
01:39:38
That's a stolen joke from a comedian.
01:39:39
I cannot remember his name.
01:39:40
Or I give him credit to cradle.
01:39:43
Is going to throw a tennis ball.
01:39:45
Probably no, I'm saying we go down.
01:39:49
Let's go. Yeah. We're not watching her.
01:39:52
We're not watching her.
01:39:53
Rude Goldberg machine.
01:39:56
That would be ridiculous.
01:39:57
I want to know why.
01:39:58
I want to know why you're two videos is because you probably made them on Apple.
01:40:01
They're not the right, resolution.
01:40:04
They'd be like, oh, my God, what?
01:40:10
She's
01:40:12
doing Sony smashing in the windshield
01:40:15
like I'm worried about Monday I.
01:40:21
I mean, I don't I don't know things.
01:40:23
I don't know stuff I don't know. What do you offer me.
01:40:25
Oh, oh
01:40:28
what do you want from me fucking this.
01:40:34
I got a mr.
01:40:34
bean sandwich video, but I don't get Mr.
01:40:36
Bean or British humor at all, so we're gonna skip that.
01:40:38
Oh, my God, sandwich hungry or you make a sandwich?
01:40:41
Oh, if a sandwich is.
01:40:42
What is it?
01:40:43
Was your fix or fucked sandwiches?
01:40:45
Stupid. So.
01:40:51
I may have just made that because
01:40:54
somebody's saying fucking sandwiches.
01:40:57
Do you ever receive.
01:40:59
You're making fucking sandwiches, goddamn it.
01:41:01
You ever see V for vendetta, where they live in a dystopian future
01:41:05
where only the rich people have real butter
01:41:07
and everyone else has a synthetic bullshit butter.
01:41:10
God knows what.
01:41:12
This is a great scene.
01:41:13
Oh, wait, that's not the right scene. God.
01:41:17
Why would God make the fake butter?
01:41:19
And then.
01:41:20
Good point.
01:41:20
Bad words.
01:41:21
It's, butter that only no one knows and someone knows.
01:41:24
But I mean, God, no. Why would God the guy with know?
01:41:27
Because God created it.
01:41:28
But why would God create?
01:41:29
The inference in that statement is that God knows everything
01:41:33
because he's almighty, all powerful.
01:41:35
I used it in the conventional way, but it's obviously
01:41:39
fictional, mythical and ridiculous.
01:41:42
But here I clicked on the right.
01:41:43
I thought we were gonna start being a pro religion show just to spite.
01:41:48
So just the fact that you're being pro religion out of spite, I believe, is a sin
01:41:51
and counterintuitive to the entire concept of being religious and Christian like.
01:41:55
So you can't like, believe in God out of spite to hurt somebody else.
01:42:00
You'll burn in hell for that.
01:42:01
I don't give a shit nice if there is such a thing.
01:42:05
So back to butter and give a fuck.
01:42:09
Delicious.
01:42:10
Good God, I haven't had real butter since I was a little girl.
01:42:16
What you get in the cow supply chain on this one little girl?
01:42:21
You stole this from chance A etc.? Yes.
01:42:24
You're insane. I did.
01:42:28
So. Movies
01:42:33
have a tendency to be predictive programing for real life.
01:42:37
This is what's happening in that typical process.
01:42:39
Oh wait, I didn't.
01:42:40
It looks, smells and tastes like the butter we're all familiar with.
01:42:44
But without the farmland, fertilizers are emissions tied to that typical process.
01:42:49
Yeah, but what does it do to their breakthrough?
01:42:51
It's happening right here in Batavia, in the middle of an industrial park
01:42:56
in a suburb west.
01:42:57
The cargo hold on. It's from CBS news.
01:43:00
So we know that it's real.
01:43:02
Well, yeah.
01:43:02
Of course this is absolutely something unprecedented is happening.
01:43:07
So you're getting this right out of your food.
01:43:08
And we're proposing with, like, make food with that.
01:43:10
Guys, the company is called safer and you better believe it.
01:43:13
Their pioneering tech uses carbon and hydrogen
01:43:15
to make the stick of butter you see on this plate.
01:43:16
As this is pretty novel, to be able to make food that also they made from
01:43:21
carbon butter with no agriculture whatsoever
01:43:25
and no long ingredient list the average person to then
01:43:28
if something happens just out of the water,
01:43:31
a little bit of lecithin as an emulsifier and like a little bit of lecithin
01:43:35
like yeah, what is made up of almost a thermal here.
01:43:41
Does anybody know what emulsifier means without it?
01:43:44
Name means like butter.
01:43:45
Did it make it buttery?
01:43:46
I don't think it does.
01:43:48
Seriously, what else would it be doing if emulsify it?
01:43:52
Arugula is good.
01:43:53
And peat salts.
01:43:57
Salad.
01:43:57
It's also good. Those. I don't know how that makes sense.
01:43:59
I think it's salad.
01:44:00
I put the essay, I put the essay, whatever I say
01:44:05
salad.
01:44:06
I pronounce it
01:44:08
pizza are in goods.
01:44:10
I don't know how that I like to do is click the next thing I just didn't.
01:44:13
Arugula is good in a beet salad.
01:44:15
Arugula is good in a regular salad.
01:44:18
What I get is I go to, Costco and I get a big plastic container called spring mix.
01:44:23
And it's got that's because I read the side and it's arugula.
01:44:26
That's why I thought the purple shit in
01:44:27
there was arugula, but it must have been something else.
01:44:31
It could just be purple lettuce, a good ass
01:44:34
toasted bread with a good ass strawberry jam and butter is amazing.
01:44:39
So is every kindergartner.
01:44:44
All right.
01:44:46
Yeah.
01:44:46
They tell me to simplify.
01:44:48
They take carbon dioxide from the air and hydrogen
01:44:51
from water, heat them up and oxidize them.
01:44:54
The final result?
01:44:56
Looks like a wax.
01:44:57
It's like some Star Trek character, but they're fat molecules.
01:45:01
Like the ones used to kill colds or vegetable oils.
01:45:05
You don't have to keep butter.
01:45:05
That is why we are.
01:45:07
I have a friend like, you know, you don't.
01:45:09
I had a friend that had they left.
01:45:11
No you don't.
01:45:13
You do though you don't, though.
01:45:15
Especially salted butter.
01:45:16
It's designed to literally let
01:45:19
you, don't you?
01:45:21
Yeah you can.
01:45:22
I love our debates, our disagreements.
01:45:24
Just like I mean, you can keep anything in the freezer,
01:45:28
so I can't argue with that.
01:45:30
But you don't need to.
01:45:32
I just, you know, put it in the freezer, I say,
01:45:34
I meant for it, I meant refrigerator refrigeration is what I meant to say.
01:45:38
That freezer butter can sit out on the table.
01:45:41
I didn't believe it either. When I was a kid. It freaked me out.
01:45:43
I saw the middle of the fridge. It's good
01:45:46
now. They didn't put it back in the fridge.
01:45:47
They left their butter on the table all the time.
01:45:49
It never saw a fridge.
01:45:51
And those are the most resilient, healthy people I get that
01:45:54
there are now they go down the road and do that.
01:45:55
Well, you're not supposed to do that.
01:45:57
It should be refrigerated.
01:45:59
It's only there with somebody.
01:46:01
It's all done.
01:46:02
Releasing zero greenhouse gases, using no farm land to feed cows.
01:46:07
We're like, not at full capacity.
01:46:09
And yeah, you see that.
01:46:10
And even though in a factory setting.
01:46:13
And so what happens when the factory can't do electricity, right.
01:46:18
The land footprint, what do we is like a thousand times
01:46:21
lower than what you.
01:46:29
Interesting,
01:46:32
Well, you don't have to refrigerated butter.
01:46:34
It's generally recommended for optimal freshness. And.
01:46:37
Yeah, to prevent it from going rancid. Yeah.
01:46:40
Salted butter, though, can be left out at room to room temperature.
01:46:43
Unsalted butter it should be yeah I disagree.
01:46:46
Doesn't says it should be but it does not have to be.
01:46:49
So we're both right.
01:46:51
I was literally saying you don't have to refrigerate it.
01:46:54
It says, well you don't have to refrigerate.
01:46:55
A drawer is still right is literally what the I overview.
01:46:58
Interesting.
01:46:59
Well Brady.
01:47:00
Well, well, Brady said it's true.
01:47:02
It's generally recommended to do a drawer set.
01:47:04
No, I think there was one winner.
01:47:06
I think there's one winner. It's all over.
01:47:08
The champion has beaten off the challenger.
01:47:14
Dude, this sounds great, but I'm going to read it anyways.
01:47:16
During the fall, I like to go to the eastern market
01:47:19
and get a fresh baguette and a bowl of soup.
01:47:21
I have what I call a poor man breakfast.
01:47:25
Wait, you have soup for breakfast?
01:47:27
So if you go to a soup kitchen, do they serve soup for breakfast?
01:47:29
Boom. Seinfeld. Comment.
01:47:32
Soup for breakfast?
01:47:35
Can can we can we come in on lines?
01:47:37
It only during the fall.
01:47:40
Well, he says he goes for the fall.
01:47:42
Maybe that's the segue.
01:47:43
Way to start to make the story more interesting.
01:47:45
So now I'm saying you I think it's like an ice soup.
01:47:49
Your jacket with the furry fucking color on it.
01:47:52
Well, no, because the fall is nicer.
01:47:54
You can be gay all year round, but the fall is
01:47:56
when you want to go sit with a hot bowl of soup.
01:47:58
Obviously, in the morning I don't know, makes no sense to me.
01:48:01
But since he's
01:48:01
our only say in the morning, you or I don't want to go for breakfast.
01:48:05
Yeah, I'm going to a good morning.
01:48:07
I have been up all night and it working and it was like six in the morning.
01:48:11
We went to
01:48:12
some late diner.
01:48:14
I might get soup, but otherwise
01:48:16
soup is not for breakfast.
01:48:18
I'm never going to go to Eastern Market for breakfast.
01:48:22
I've been to Eastern Market, but I don't recall.
01:48:26
And I think I just turned around there the other day after because I couldn't.
01:48:29
The 75 was too backed up, so I had to go a different way.
01:48:33
I went a little east and I saw a market area.
01:48:37
So I assume if you're in Detroit,
01:48:39
in the campus marsh area and you just go all the way past it,
01:48:43
keep going east,
01:48:43
eventually you're going to hit Eastern Market before you hit Belisle right?
01:48:47
Right, right.
01:48:51
Anyway, just showing my prowess
01:48:53
about knowing a little bit about Detroit I know thing and been there a long time.
01:48:56
But I went back, I knew everything, I knew every street.
01:48:58
I didn't get caught if you first time you go there
01:49:01
and then get caught with, what are you doing?
01:49:02
Get caught in a one way street and mean.
01:49:04
So you're saying you get caught trying to drive around
01:49:09
and stuff up?
01:49:10
Can't get can't get there from here
01:49:12
because all the one way street and some stuff up.
01:49:15
I was pretty proud, dude.
01:49:16
I was walking around, I was smoking and nobody said a word.
01:49:19
And then I saw on the internet,
01:49:21
people are losing their minds about the smell of weed in public cities.
01:49:24
Smell like weed.
01:49:25
I'll tell you one thing.
01:49:26
I walked through Detroit and cities did not smell like weed.
01:49:29
You know what they smelled more like because it was 90 degrees.
01:49:31
They smelled like rotting sewer.
01:49:32
Every other every intersection or every other intersection
01:49:36
had this wafting, horrible smell of sewer so that when I walked by
01:49:40
and smelled somebody smelling weed, it was a delight.
01:49:43
I don't know, I think if we're going to worry about the smell of weed
01:49:46
in the cities, maybe we should worry about the smell of sewer first.
01:49:51
Here's an idea we could even cover up the smell of sewer with the smell of weed.
01:49:55
Weed is sweet smelling.
01:49:56
Even if you don't smoke weed or you hate weed,
01:49:59
how can you complain about the smell of weed?
01:50:01
I heard one other person argue back, well, the people around
01:50:04
you are going to get high, not outside your fucking mushrooms like weed in there.
01:50:07
Yeah, no, that's not how that works.
01:50:09
Yeah, because you can smell it, doesn't mean no, I smelled it,
01:50:12
I feel, and I've heard people say that I feel something.
01:50:16
Why? Because you were walking for fucking ten minutes
01:50:18
where you park to a game, and there were, like, two other people that took two hits
01:50:22
wafted by you, which you walk.
01:50:26
Yeah. What you feel is the need to get.
01:50:27
You want to get high and you never have.
01:50:29
And so that little adrenaline of your my body going,
01:50:31
who am I getting high is getting you a little bit high in the excitement.
01:50:34
So, hey, I have an idea for you.
01:50:36
Yeah, try tripping yourself up.
01:50:38
And that's just called adrenaline.
01:50:40
It'll calm you down
01:50:41
because I was smoking it and I was just like, yeah, whatever, man.
01:50:44
Whatever. It's all good.
01:50:47
Catnip is kind of like, weed.
01:50:50
Well, pots are pretty important part
01:50:52
to catch higher than a kite.
01:50:55
I know you're all dog people, but I cannot know cannabis.
01:50:59
A lot like weed.
01:50:59
I was trying to segway poorly, and you know that.
01:51:03
Do me a favor. Trust your cat.
01:51:04
You ever been like, do the cats tripping out about nothing, man?
01:51:07
It's just like, well, we can't do that.
01:51:09
I don't have a cat.
01:51:10
Cats do that.
01:51:10
And then I always peer people that don't have cats.
01:51:13
Go cats this trip out for no reason.
01:51:14
And very, very rarely they do do that.
01:51:16
And some cats do that all the time. Typically, though,
01:51:21
go to the where
01:51:21
that cat is tracking look and typically you'll find something.
01:51:24
Here's a great example.
01:51:26
Now Maggie.
01:51:29
And it has to do a toast.
01:51:30
Maggie, what are you doing?
01:51:32
Maggie. You dumb fucking cat! Mr..
01:51:34
Watch the cat.
01:51:35
Grab a fork and put on
01:51:37
right.
01:51:40
It's nothing down there.
01:51:42
People are so much smarter than cats.
01:51:43
There's nothing down in there.
01:51:46
Plus is do there? You never know.
01:51:48
All right, here's all right.
01:51:49
My cat doesn't even go up on my.
01:51:51
I have two cats. They don't go on the counters.
01:51:53
They don't go on anything that my butt doesn't touch.
01:51:55
That's the rule.
01:51:57
I have cameras, you don't break people
01:51:58
like when you leave the house, they fucking bubble up. No, no, no, they don't.
01:52:03
So the the fact that this lady has her cat up on the counter
01:52:06
going through the toaster and is not stopping
01:52:07
the cat bothers me more than anything at this point in the video.
01:52:10
Trust me, something's going to bother me more.
01:52:12
Okay,
01:52:14
Maggie.
01:52:18
Oh. Oh, what?
01:52:22
It happened so fast.
01:52:23
I don't think you saw it.
01:52:25
Oh, did you see it?
01:52:28
See if I can catch it.
01:52:30
Piece of bread, pop?
01:52:31
No, I think it's also a big
01:52:35
negative.
01:52:36
Maggie. Yeah,
01:52:38
I clicked too.
01:52:39
Fast forward to the video.
01:52:42
I just did it again.
01:52:52
I missed it again.
01:52:53
It's so hard.
01:52:53
Can I just go back? Nope.
01:52:55
Because this video saw this. Great.
01:52:57
Was there.
01:52:59
Catch it right here.
01:53:00
I poop.
01:53:02
There it is.
01:53:05
Right there. It's so slow.
01:53:07
See it?
01:53:07
Cute little guy. Yeah.
01:53:11
Sometimes you pick out.
01:53:16
Oh, fuck.
01:53:19
Oh, wait.
01:53:19
That mouse caught it. I didn't I watched that video like three times.
01:53:22
I didn't see that.
01:53:23
Don't just call it the cat fucking caught it.
01:53:26
Maggie.
01:53:27
Incredible.
01:53:29
Fuck yeah, the cat has it.
01:53:31
Good, kitty.
01:53:33
Well, let's watch that again.
01:53:34
I wasn't the fuck did he get it?
01:53:36
For the record, that's the only purpose of cats.
01:53:39
That's the only reason why they're inside, is
01:53:41
because I would rather have two cats than 30 mice.
01:53:44
You have 30 mice in your house?
01:53:46
No. But do you live in it?
01:53:50
So my parents lived in a wonderful, affluent neighborhood.
01:53:54
And then as she got older and after my father passed away,
01:53:57
we moved her out of there to another house.
01:53:59
I hadn't lived there for years.
01:54:01
She had a housekeeper clean the house like crazy, almost anal
01:54:05
cleaning it, and when we moved everything out of the kitchen, we empty the drawers
01:54:08
and in the back of every drawer were droppings.
01:54:11
So you may have mice and not even fucking know it.
01:54:15
If you don't have a cat.
01:54:19
I know, or my mom lived in squalor.
01:54:21
I'm not sure one of those two things is true.
01:54:23
Nothing down in there is nothing man in
01:54:27
magic.
01:54:27
Yeah, she she gets it with her claw.
01:54:29
Maggie swats it. Oh, yeah.
01:54:31
Okay. Catches it on one side.
01:54:33
You got it with the right claw.
01:54:37
Then what do you do?
01:54:39
The cat eats the mouse.
01:54:40
What do you mean, what do you do? You do nothing.
01:54:43
You go good.
01:54:43
Kill the mouse. Cats eat mice.
01:54:46
They do?
01:54:46
Yeah, and
01:54:48
you either eat it just like it.
01:54:50
Played with it and kill the well.
01:54:53
So yeah, a lot of times the mice that don't,
01:54:55
especially if they've never been outside, they won't know what to do with it.
01:54:57
They'll play with it till it dies.
01:54:58
Then they'll cry at you like my, my toy doesn't work anymore.
01:55:02
Yeah, that's usually what I do late at night by myself.
01:55:06
It's your penis and it's flaccid.
01:55:07
You should stop abusing it and fucking go to sleep.
01:55:10
When that happens, you're done.
01:55:11
Until it does, you're done. You're.
01:55:14
We will keep going.
01:55:16
I mean, sometimes you can keep going and it'll happen again.
01:55:19
But as you get older, that happens less and less infrequently until finally
01:55:23
it doesn't happen at all.
01:55:24
I'm going to come.
01:55:30
All right.
01:55:31
One more of these fucking things.
01:55:35
I say one more, but there's probably so many more.
01:55:38
Oh, wait, we read that one already.
01:55:40
Oh, let me go.
01:55:43
Oh my gosh, what?
01:55:46
That?
01:55:48
Geez, I was only smashing in the windshield.
01:55:52
I was like, I'm worried about Monday.
01:56:00
I'm pretty sure we've played this on the show,
01:56:02
but this is Gilly's Rube Goldberg contribution for the show this week.
01:56:07
We will close this.
01:56:10
He blows.
01:56:11
I think
01:56:13
that's used to be nasty after going
01:56:15
through that incident and in the.
01:56:18
Oh my God.
01:56:19
So that's a good it's a good reminder
01:56:23
going back to America's Got Talent.
01:56:28
Because I was just watching that yesterday,
01:56:30
like the last episode of the auditions or whatever.
01:56:34
And I've got one of those.
01:56:37
Those are, the little plastic boat, the little drills, drill bits and shit
01:56:41
going,
01:56:46
America's got talent, God damn it,
01:56:48
I'm losing it.
01:56:51
I fuck oh, oh
01:56:55
oh. No!
01:57:01
Oh, well. Oh!
01:57:26
That's my consciousness breaking all the.
01:57:28
Yeah.
01:57:28
I mean, that's a little.
01:57:33
Violent.
01:57:36
Oh, yeah.
01:57:36
Strong situation.
01:57:41
These weird guys made this, like, drink.
01:57:43
Yeah.
01:57:44
You didn't like this shit that was taped to their heads
01:57:46
or whatever, using a blender or whatever.
01:57:47
And then they had this big, long straw, and they brought all the way to Simon.
01:57:52
And he was sucking on the straw to get the drink all the way from the.
01:57:55
It was like a 30ft straw in there. Was it?
01:57:57
I could you look like there was like little spots of moisture in it.
01:58:01
I'm assuming they may be. Really? Oh, no.
01:58:03
We suck again.
01:58:05
I'm assuming maybe they rinsed up beforehand, but he was, like,
01:58:08
sucking on it.
01:58:09
And then he sort of like spitting the water out.
01:58:11
It was they gross because I don't know if maybe like,
01:58:14
I don't know how long that water has been in there,
01:58:16
but I'm hoping that they like, did their due due diligence.
01:58:19
Do do do do do do did it cheese or oils?
01:58:22
The same that they cleaned it out.
01:58:23
But I think it was kind of gross here.
01:58:25
This was all done releasing zero greenhouse gas.
01:58:28
All right, back to my fake butter farm land.
01:58:30
Yeah. House.
01:58:31
We're like, not at full capacity in this facility,
01:58:34
even though we're standing in a factory,
01:58:36
in addition to the carbon footprint being reprocessed like this. Right.
01:58:38
The land footprint is like a thousand. Like a lot.
01:58:40
What you need for I know what you're thinking.
01:58:42
I think we need to talk about the oxygen that plants provide.
01:58:45
I love butters, I was a,
01:58:48
the amount,
01:58:49
admittedly surprisingly, like butter.
01:58:53
Cheers.
01:58:55
You it. Is it cold?
01:58:57
Yeah. Keep it cold.
01:58:58
They put it on cold.
01:59:00
You don't have to produce the stuff.
01:59:03
You probably don't.
01:59:03
Another reason they say this makes an impact.
01:59:06
No palm oil can contribute to deforestation and climate change.
01:59:09
It's time to palm oil.
01:59:10
The greenhouse gas submitted every year.
01:59:12
Because that just spill plain from my.
01:59:14
So why could you get a taste.
01:59:15
You're see seedling now they're working directly with restaurants.
01:59:17
Bakeries are saying animals and plants are made with their butter.
01:59:19
And he said they don't know if that is a giveaway because that's wrong.
01:59:24
The bakeries and food suppliers check back on the animals and plants,
01:59:29
oils from animals and plants.
01:59:32
It every year 7% is from the production
01:59:35
of fats and oils from animals and plants.
01:59:38
So when you do a discussion of those right now, there were six.
01:59:42
They'll still have to fucking these chocolates.
01:59:44
Maybe there's 30 transported by our in station or with our partners.
01:59:47
We have.
01:59:47
I got to be honest, I was kind of more like around 27
01:59:49
their teens here in Batavia, Illinois, and their whole lab based in San
01:59:51
Jose, California, backed by Bill gates, who wrote in his blog, quote at that drive
01:59:56
here in Batavia, Illinois, and their home, you know,
01:59:58
why would I be involved tonight?
02:00:02
Who wrote in his blog, quote, the idea of switching to,
02:00:06
you know, why would I be involved in that?
02:00:09
To significantly reduce our carbon footprint is a man,
02:00:13
and they're not doing it because it's efficient
02:00:14
or because it's healthy, or because it's better?
02:00:16
Because it's worse. We have no idea.
02:00:18
If you say you have any idea what he owns all the farmland, he's
02:00:22
doing it right, which means there just there will be no pushback because,
02:00:27
you know, why would
02:00:28
I be involved in that?
02:00:32
These are one of my new favorite conspiracies.
02:00:33
Is our food stuff
02:00:36
supply chain and how it's just allegedly being taken over.
02:00:40
Yeah.
02:00:41
The owner of the head of Nestlé said food stuff is not a right.
02:00:45
And then I mean, foodstuff,
02:00:48
foodstuff covers everything that you ingest in your body.
02:00:50
Apparently they don't.
02:00:51
You can't really say food.
02:00:52
If they say food, I think then they're legally
02:00:54
they have to make certain things and it has to be food.
02:00:57
But if it's like plastic or oil, it's not digestible.
02:01:00
I don't think it'll be food.
02:01:01
So they invented the word foodstuff
02:01:04
next week on flat, rancid foodstuff.
02:01:07
It sounds stupid to a regular layman, but to lawyers, they use it to distinguish
02:01:10
the difference between naturally grown food and chemically processed foodstuff.
02:01:15
Do you see the difference?
02:01:15
A regular game in just a
02:01:18
yes, regular, regular game.
02:01:22
Layman who likes to gay men gaming.
02:01:24
I mean, a regular gaming who likes to layman
02:01:28
like a layman.
02:01:30
A man
02:01:32
may maybe.
02:01:33
I would like to lay by that.
02:01:35
Anyways,
02:01:37
it's so surprise.
02:01:38
Bill gates nine the Franken butter difference.
02:01:41
This is really about how we feed our butter
02:01:45
can make it different and heal our planet at the same time.
02:01:49
I put more information on food sustainability and one fact I bought
02:01:53
skim milk and I make a ranch from it, and I shake it.
02:01:56
You pause it right there.
02:01:58
I shake the shit out of it because I don't like to pour it
02:02:01
into my bowl before I make, before I start mixing.
02:02:03
And there's big chunks.
02:02:04
It looks like vomit in the report.
02:02:06
Skim milk without shaking the shit out of it.
02:02:09
I shook it so much that I turned it in.
02:02:12
Wow. Well, have you ever opened a skim?
02:02:15
Milk is going. I'm sorry,
02:02:17
I'm sorry.
02:02:17
No. My brain. I had a stroke, remember? I'm retarded.
02:02:19
I mix things up like refrigerator and freezer
02:02:21
and now I'm mixing up skim milk.
02:02:22
And what's the opposite?
02:02:25
You take you.
02:02:26
You take it out the whole milk?
02:02:28
No. Even more than that.
02:02:30
Buttermilk. Buttermilk. I'm sorry.
02:02:31
I'm talking about butter.
02:02:32
No, no, I've never had that.
02:02:34
Well, if you make good ranch, you make it from buttermilk.
02:02:36
If you don't care about health, and you exercise enough
02:02:38
and you're active enough, and you like buttermilk,
02:02:41
and I'm buying buttermilk and making my own ranch.
02:02:44
Oh, you should.
02:02:45
You got to come over to my ranch.
02:02:46
It's the best ranch in the world. You,
02:02:49
you have an
02:02:50
open invitation, and now we're not dipping a pizza in it.
02:02:53
That's not gay. It's food.
02:02:54
I'm not asking you to come over and suck my dick. What's the problem, anyways?
02:02:57
You gotta come over.
02:02:59
Try. But
02:03:00
you got gotta try this.
02:03:01
It's like macaroni and cheese, you know?
02:03:04
You get anyways.
02:03:05
Dude, it's way better than the store here.
02:03:08
Just as far as health.
02:03:09
I made it, okay?
02:03:10
And there was a little bit left in the mixing bowl,
02:03:12
and I was just dip and shit in it all night and I left it out.
02:03:15
Talk about not refrigerating shit. I got up the next day.
02:03:17
Now if you would leave store bought stuff,
02:03:18
it would be yellow and clear and disgusting and probably even hard.
02:03:22
And you should never go near it.
02:03:23
This stuff, 24 hours later, was still creamy and edible
02:03:29
because it was so natural.
02:03:30
Anyways, back to what I was saying.
02:03:32
I shook the buttermilk, not skim milk.
02:03:34
I shook the buttermilk up so much that when I opened it,
02:03:37
I think it's just because my right hand is stronger than my left hand.
02:03:39
I can't figure out why that is.
02:03:41
Yeah, so sexy.
02:03:44
But when I ended up opening the one on my right hand,
02:03:47
I had actually created butter in.
02:03:49
I shook it so much that it got so frothy
02:03:52
that it was like frothy.
02:03:54
Yeah, it made it go from chunky hard back to hard again.
02:03:58
Kind of what we were talking about earlier.
02:03:59
I was able to get it too hard again after getting the cheese.
02:04:04
Oh dude, that was the nastiest thing I've ever heard on the show.
02:04:09
That's not me.
02:04:10
Is that Gary?
02:04:11
Oh that's scary.
02:04:12
You don't remember that? It's been a minute.
02:04:14
Oh, no, I don't.
02:04:15
You're not familiar with my drops. Come on.
02:04:17
I don't remember that.
02:04:18
I know it's been a minute.
02:04:20
I mean, I assume everyone has down syndrome,
02:04:25
so we should let the commenters decide which way the show steers next.
02:04:28
We can either,
02:04:31
talk about rap,
02:04:32
or we can talk about crystal skulls
02:04:35
or penis.
02:04:38
I don't want to talk about my penis.
02:04:40
What does crystal skull have to do?
02:04:42
A toast.
02:04:45
I don't ask questions like that.
02:04:47
Well, it's off topic.
02:04:50
It's definitely off topic.
02:04:51
What happened to cuckold?
02:04:54
I didn't know her, so the only way I could do that,
02:04:56
I thought we could call the show otherwise.
02:04:59
And we can save that for another one if you want.
02:05:01
No, they got a had to go back to back.
02:05:03
All or nothing.
02:05:05
Cuckold I don't, I don't it's too late I don't, I don't know succubus to cuckold.
02:05:10
No I know that's the best part.
02:05:15
Yeah I don't,
02:05:16
I don't, I don't, I don't it just infuriates me.
02:05:19
It's not I know it does to the.
02:05:22
That's like this.
02:05:24
Like so weak.
02:05:27
Yeah.
02:05:28
And just taking a read all I'm thinking about it.
02:05:30
Somebody even coming near my wife, just the thought of
02:05:32
it makes me think about nothing else. I'm thinking about laws
02:05:35
I don't give a shit about and how fast I would go to jail.
02:05:38
I just feel like, does that does that make.
02:05:41
Wait, hang on.
02:05:41
Does that make me insecure or just normal?
02:05:46
I don't know,
02:05:48
it's more than jealousy to because.
02:05:49
Because cock to me cock isn't like somebody just flirting or something.
02:05:52
Cook.
02:05:53
You have to be sitting in a chair
02:05:54
while somebody is having sex with somebody you care about.
02:05:56
Maybe you like you like it though
02:05:59
I don't understand
02:06:02
because she because she you are willing to put all that aside.
02:06:05
You're off and she's getting off.
02:06:07
And since she likes it, that makes you happy.
02:06:10
Apparently I get like not I don't knock on my ass.
02:06:13
I'm an asshole. I don't care about women. You're just.
02:06:15
You're not that way.
02:06:16
Yeah,
02:06:17
you need to be more giving to your wife and let her have a different I like it.
02:06:20
The person who has the seven minute monologue about Crystal skull says rap
02:06:24
in a comedic way.
02:06:30
I'm surprised
02:06:30
it's nice Gary still there, but, where they can't just be on the show.
02:06:35
I mean, cheers to Gary.
02:06:37
Oh, I love this. Here's to Gary.
02:06:40
Love that her mouth is still open, but fuck him if he's never coming back.
02:06:43
But fuck them. Yeah, I don't know.
02:06:44
I just I just wish somebody would have, like, a hard conversation with them.
02:06:49
I want can can I have Mrs.
02:06:51
Gary's number? I'd like to have a chat.
02:06:53
Yeah. Me too.
02:06:54
She invited us over for dinner, but I think that would be uncomfortable.
02:06:57
I needed some time to heal and get my thoughts right.
02:07:00
Things. We hate her, right?
02:07:01
You know, now she knows I don't hate her.
02:07:08
All right.
02:07:12
That was the weirdest.
02:07:13
Don't ever let somebody tell you you can't do something.
02:07:19
Not even me.
02:07:22
All right,
02:07:24
all right.
02:07:26
You got a dream.
02:07:28
You got to protect it.
02:07:32
People can't do something themselves.
02:07:33
They want to tell you.
02:07:34
You can't do it.
02:07:40
You want something?
02:07:41
Go get it.
02:07:43
Period.
02:07:53
Life lesson.
02:07:54
The Brady.
02:07:59
All right, let's go back to this woman with her mouth open.
02:08:01
Hell back. That's all.
02:08:04
Look.
02:08:04
Says ice says ice on it.
02:08:07
Oh, that's the headlines for the news.
02:08:08
It's having another how this could impact our food industry
02:08:12
moving forward in the story that's up on our website right now.
02:08:17
All right.
02:08:19
Holy crap.
02:08:21
That's nice.
02:08:22
Brady. So.
02:08:34
So do we need a third guy there?
02:08:39
We don't have a third man.
02:08:40
All right. Damn it. Horseshit.
02:08:43
So you hear about the,
02:08:45
So someone who used to be on the show
02:08:48
was, quite well known for, the sword smithing.
02:08:51
Isn't there a sword smithing bumper?
02:08:55
No, never.
02:08:56
Smithing of swords. Bumper.
02:08:59
The other guy, will it cut?
02:09:00
Yeah. Will it cut?
02:09:03
That's like way swords.
02:09:05
Ten somewhere here, sir.
02:09:07
There, there. Yeah.
02:09:10
Do you hear, all about this shit in Australia,
02:09:15
they've evening
02:09:15
a shopping center in Melbourne's west is beefing up its security tonight
02:09:20
after two separate machete attacks in the space of just three days.
02:09:24
At least 14 smashed by police over the attacks at Pacific Werribee,
02:09:29
with one victim, a 14 year old male, recovering and more on the royal tour.
02:09:34
It was like a lots of machete attacks all over city.
02:09:38
Now do you know why?
02:09:39
Because they've been done.
02:09:40
Brutal brawls at Pacific Werribee.
02:09:42
Just 40.
02:09:45
Completely and utterly fed up with the way they going.
02:09:49
Last look, he's coming at us with a knife and it's a small boy.
02:09:54
He was ambushed and slashed by a group of six said to be known to him.
02:09:59
That's not a noise.
02:10:00
That's a machete in this black sedan.
02:10:03
A pain in the black.
02:10:05
Sydney's heart on their tail.
02:10:07
Oh, well, the boy was rushed to the Royal Children's, they say.
02:10:10
Oh, with my seeing the boy machetes.
02:10:13
Big deal.
02:10:15
They don't have to buy them.
02:10:16
They've got them all ready.
02:10:17
Early on Thursday night, around a dozen youths from rival
02:10:21
gangs wielded the soon to be banned.
02:10:23
They were banned from sporting goods stores, plunging the store into lockdown.
02:10:28
All fled.
02:10:29
Two of the boys took themselves to hospital later that night.
02:10:33
There was a bit of insecurity amongst the community,
02:10:36
especially the young families of
02:10:39
them as well,
02:10:40
and I would want them to feel safe when they're going to a shopping center.
02:10:43
The site
02:10:45
is set to come into effect in just three weeks, with more than 40
02:10:49
safe disposal bins to be placed at police stations across Victoria.
02:10:53
This is vicious animal lives.
02:10:55
Not all locals are convinced, and that's a good idea.
02:10:58
We get a lot off the street.
02:10:59
I've got a hand. 1 or 2 and myself.
02:11:01
Don't make left to me by me. Dad.
02:11:04
No, it's like two knives.
02:11:06
Ha ha ha.
02:11:07
What are the garbage?
02:11:09
No arrests have been made in neither incident.
02:11:13
Six year old son Jack
02:11:18
and other criminals are.
02:11:26
Yeah.
02:11:26
I'm not thinking that,
02:11:30
I think if people want to hurt people, they'll find a way to hurt people.
02:11:35
Belle, Iowa is off.
02:11:36
Jesse.
02:11:37
Yeah, we were.
02:11:39
We did the Riverwalk.
02:11:42
So the river.
02:11:45
We. I don't mean like.
02:11:48
I just meant that direction.
02:11:50
No, but you drive, and you see the abandoned, fucking zoo.
02:11:54
This is all creepy and weird.
02:11:56
The Byblos zoo.
02:11:57
Oh. No way. There was a boat.
02:12:00
The Belle Isle Zoo.
02:12:03
I enjoyed the tall ships,
02:12:04
but it did not look like a comfortable way to cross over the ocean.
02:12:08
Just sitting at the doctor, things are like.
02:12:12
You know, run back and forth.
02:12:15
Yeah. Those like that, I don't know.
02:12:17
Are you felt like if it was open now, do you think
02:12:19
you would take your kids there or or know where?
02:12:24
I don't know.
02:12:25
No. I love the fair so much.
02:12:30
The fair?
02:12:32
I made a fair.
02:12:33
No. Let's see, that's different.
02:12:35
I think
02:12:36
the last time I heard
02:12:39
you could actually go there and buy a knick.
02:12:46
Hi, friends.
02:12:47
Welcome back to the channel livestock.
02:12:49
We need a fair today.
02:12:52
This is a big fair
02:12:54
in south eastern Michigan.
02:12:57
There's a lot to see. So join me.
02:13:00
Let's see if we can have some fun.
02:13:02
Oh, I do not go straight to adults 20, please, for these paying cash.
02:13:06
This is last year.
02:13:08
Wonder why no cash allowed anymore.
02:13:13
I made a fair.
02:13:16
And it feels good to dig land that looks different.
02:13:19
They're made a fair good.
02:13:22
It's chicken for me.
02:13:23
Okay, here
02:13:25
we have.
02:13:29
The state fair is a big fair.
02:13:31
This is like they have attractions.
02:13:33
A small town fair. Yeah, but you should eat.
02:13:36
What kind of sandwiches I got?
02:13:39
Oh, they got sandwiches right there.
02:13:40
So some sandwiches?
02:13:43
Yes. And then I got Pepsi.
02:13:45
What's my name? Even know?
02:13:46
It's some medium sausage sandwiches.
02:13:49
So I kind of see this is a cartoon character.
02:13:52
Oh, they got an animal that's not a cartoon character.
02:13:56
This is my individual walking right up the street.
02:13:59
You do in front of his house.
02:14:01
So I can see it's going to be a lot of work.
02:14:03
Well, I only had a
02:14:07
so much.
02:14:08
Oh, that's good, that's good.
02:14:09
I do the paint.
02:14:10
I think there's more, for.
02:14:14
Oh, I think you keep me around.
02:14:15
So really, what's it?
02:14:17
What's his name? You,
02:14:21
I get down.
02:14:22
So what kind of area of the world is children?
02:14:25
Everyone is a
02:14:28
pretty.
02:14:29
You okay? Bunnies. We get it.
02:14:33
Okay.
02:14:33
There's no more than what I thought of the amount of fair.
02:14:36
Another prize winner right here.
02:14:38
Interesting.
02:14:39
Which one of you let me venture to the air model
02:14:42
for pets other than.
02:14:45
It's like a very like.
02:14:46
How long does it go on?
02:14:47
Isn't it just a weekend small version of the Indiana State Fair?
02:14:51
Yes, that was correct.
02:14:52
I drove right through Eastern Market.
02:14:54
I knew it because 75 was blocked off, so I had to go a couple blocks over
02:14:58
and then just run parallel to 75.
02:14:59
And I went right up to Clinton, right through Eastern Market.
02:15:03
We were walking tour on the Riverwalk, were walking
02:15:06
toward Belle Isle that my wife said she could walk that far in the heat.
02:15:11
So we didn't.
02:15:13
We turned around and this guy has me.
02:15:17
So let me go. We may go here.
02:15:20
I might go here and check this out.
02:15:21
Oh my God, they got the cool dark balloon.
02:15:24
Let's go for sure.
02:15:26
Yeah, well, go go go.
02:15:27
I, I won't pay for it, but I'll look at it.
02:15:30
I watch other people in Somalia last.
02:15:35
Week.
02:15:35
It's back to the carousel.
02:15:36
I can't find the carousel here.
02:15:39
There's a reason.
02:15:40
Right corner.
02:15:48
What you're looking for.
02:15:49
There's a there's a demolition derby.
02:15:51
Are you kidding me?
02:15:52
Oh, yeah.
02:15:53
We didn't walk far at all. That's.
02:15:55
Yeah, we didn't go here. We didn't go near,
02:15:57
We drove near Eastern Market, which is.
02:15:59
You're kidding me.
02:16:01
No, I
02:16:02
a little bit south and north.
02:16:04
Yeah, I think by missed.
02:16:07
That's it.
02:16:07
Guys, I need a favor.
02:16:09
For the record, everything on the Detroit River is off.
02:16:12
Jefferson isn't everything on the Detroit River off Jefferson.
02:16:17
And I love the fair so much.
02:16:20
My wife informed me that people fish
02:16:22
and eat a lot of fish out of the Detroit River.
02:16:23
I thought I was pretty nasty and dirty.
02:16:25
Would you eat fish out of the Detroit River?
02:16:30
No, because it comes down Saint Clair
02:16:33
and Saint Clair is where it starts to get gross,
02:16:36
starts to get gross.
02:16:38
I want to eat fish where it starts to get good here on.
02:16:47
This where start
02:16:50
fellow stupid monkey people.
02:16:53
It is believed that
02:16:55
a lot of ancient alien.
02:16:59
So, remember when it was like somebody bringing us a
02:17:03
catastrophe?
02:17:04
But we weren't allowed to talk about war?
02:17:06
No religious, 12 of them.
02:17:08
Religious things, crystal skulls.
02:17:11
I'm going to try using this and imbued them with their history.
02:17:14
Turn them up a little bit. Be quiet. Yeah, I'm trying to.
02:17:16
I added a volume one, the thing,
02:17:19
but I don't know if it works well
02:17:23
and have enjoyed using it.
02:17:25
So these civilizations were forced to just turn it up to 3%.
02:17:29
It didn't change a bit that it obliterated it.
02:17:31
No, no. Let's go 16 I can hear him.
02:17:34
It's just.
02:17:35
And the Atlanteans, were the protectors of Georgian crystal souls.
02:17:40
In the Atlanteans, Atlantis suffered devastation itself.
02:17:43
So the survivors of Atlantis, why would it be a skull
02:17:46
and why would it be out throughout the human
02:17:49
and gave the 13 skulls?
02:17:51
According to legend, I get that you can
02:17:55
a prominent civilization in all of that, right?
02:17:57
I'm sorry that wasn't on that tab.
02:17:59
I was turn up the tab on the stupid extension. Here we go.
02:18:01
13 skull ladder. Now. Well,
02:18:06
in 1924, I think so.
02:18:08
Frederick Albert. No.
02:18:12
Yeah.
02:18:14
Mitchell Hedges I say Mitchell Hedges.
02:18:17
Mitch Hedberg, famous adventurer, explorer,
02:18:21
the original Indiana Jones,
02:18:24
the original one.
02:18:26
I should have had it ready.
02:18:27
I knew I should have had it ready.
02:18:28
I knew you were going to say that.
02:18:30
Everyone said that had it ready.
02:18:32
And then I've completely failed.
02:18:36
I apologize, I will do better.
02:18:41
People give me a gift certificate as a gift.
02:18:43
I think a gift certificate is a bullshit gift.
02:18:46
Yeah. What's a gift certificate? You take money.
02:18:48
That was good everywhere.
02:18:56
And you ruin it?
02:18:57
Yeah.
02:18:59
Just give me the fucking 20.
02:19:03
In fact, one of the Indiana Jones movies was about the crystal.
02:19:06
Crystal skulls.
02:19:08
Well, in January, on January 1st,
02:19:12
1924,
02:19:15
he discovered this,
02:19:16
these ruins of Mayan civilization,
02:19:21
including a giant pyramid at the center of there.
02:19:23
The ruins,
02:19:26
there was an entrance, but it was too small for
02:19:30
Mitchell Hedges to fit into.
02:19:32
So he asked his.
02:19:38
You just want to dictate where I shop.
02:19:44
I think the most the most popular attraction
02:19:47
in all the amusement parks is always
02:19:50
the line.
02:19:54
I think they need to pump it up a little, make it sound exciting.
02:19:57
Come to Magic Mountain this summer instead.
02:20:00
In the line.
02:20:06
Two hours of sheer tediousness,
02:20:11
a twist.
02:20:12
Guides to, you know, descend in and and take a look.
02:20:16
They were all too afraid.
02:20:18
The place was curse.
02:20:19
It was. It was bad juju.
02:20:22
And so he said, is everyone too
02:20:25
cowardly to go make the greatest discovery of all time?
02:20:28
And a voice from the back said, I'll go.
02:20:31
It was his own adopted daughter
02:20:35
who had been adventuring with him since she was aged
02:20:37
ten, but, she was coming up on her 17th birthday
02:20:41
that January 1924 and according to her, lost the plot to Indiana Jones
02:20:47
tied two ropes around her, and she descended down
02:20:50
into the entrance of this to the top of the pyramid.
02:20:54
And when she got down to the bottom chamber,
02:20:57
she found got a resolution of sharpness and shame.
02:21:00
You're not on the show anymore.
02:21:02
You got to move your flattery inside
02:21:03
and work it over to your right, and you can see it gave the rope a tug.
02:21:07
They pulled her up.
02:21:08
She gave the crystal skull to her adopted father, and her adoptive
02:21:12
father, in turn, gave Harrison Ford King,
02:21:17
who I accepted the gift graciously.
02:21:22
But three years later, for Mitchell, Hedges had done so much good.
02:21:28
Oh, I forgot about the drinking. It.
02:21:31
And it was the only artifact, the Crystal skulls drinking game.
02:21:35
Every looks bad for himself of all of us.
02:21:37
An archeologist and archeologist.
02:21:40
The way I served, she inherited
02:21:44
the skull and the.
02:21:46
She had no more income.
02:21:47
So she planned on taking it on a road tour where people pay to,
02:21:53
look at it or pay even more to even touch it.
02:21:57
But here's the thing.
02:21:59
Total scarce.
02:22:01
So people were getting, allegedly killed by looking in its eyes
02:22:06
or or mysteriously injured soon after she allegedly.
02:22:11
That's ignorant.
02:22:12
And they even said when they pulled it out of its box, they'd
02:22:15
hear music and people's voices.
02:22:19
Or some people claim that it could speak to telepathically.
02:22:23
Well, in order to get it on a road show and actually make some money, she needed
02:22:27
certified.
02:22:29
She needed someone to verify that it was the genuine article.
02:22:33
So she took it to the most advanced crystal laboratory
02:22:38
at the time, which was a crystal laboratory.
02:22:41
Is that a laboratory,
02:22:44
or is it maybe not a single piece of very
02:22:46
crystal clear crystal?
02:22:49
Doesn't all crystal have to be crystal clear?
02:22:51
But she said, what about the, you know, the other properties, the the
02:22:54
the stuff that that makes it special?
02:22:57
The the singing, the voices, the the strange,
02:23:03
emanations from this thing.
02:23:04
And they said, well, emanation I mystical claims we do a scientific study
02:23:10
of the emitting sign, but we we can't gentlemen.
02:23:13
Magic. Let's broaden our mind.
02:23:15
She did get someone to say that they felt strange so
02:23:19
close enough, took it out and wrote to her.
02:23:21
And that's how she fed herself for her remaining decades.
02:23:25
Well, it was anonymously
02:23:28
donated to the Smithsonian in Washington, DC,
02:23:32
and finally, the three
02:23:37
skulls that were known
02:23:41
were able to be collaborated.
02:23:45
You should clean your fingernails.
02:23:46
Do are you metallurgy?
02:23:48
Are you my metal? Are you?
02:23:50
Are you blacksmithing lately?
02:23:54
We're able to be collaborated between,
02:23:58
I believe was Paris, London and Washington DC.
02:24:02
And come to find out.
02:24:06
The parents one was closest to the source.
02:24:08
Eugene Boban,
02:24:12
a archeologist from France,
02:24:16
but back in the 19th century,
02:24:20
was selling these crystal skulls in his shop.
02:24:23
And they were fakes.
02:24:26
And they.
02:24:29
So now they knew that it wasn't even real.
02:24:33
This wasn't a real story.
02:24:34
And it does explain why I feel,
02:24:38
for Mitchell Hedges.
02:24:49
But don't sit on the real.
02:24:56
I play tennis now.
02:24:58
I think that's depressing about playing tennis.
02:25:01
Is that no matter how hard I try, I'll never be as good as a wall.
02:25:08
Was didn't include it in his autobiography.
02:25:11
He's a fake.
02:25:12
My ally.
02:25:14
Fake crystal skulls.
02:25:16
Yeah.
02:25:17
There's there's the real Chris stole skulls.
02:25:20
I don't know, I guess we have to keep watching and
02:25:24
he didn't.
02:25:24
You know,
02:25:27
have the skull like it was,
02:25:29
allegedly in storage for 27 years.
02:25:33
Well, come to find out, it
02:25:35
wasn't even made for a good 20 years after,
02:25:39
it was found because it was,
02:25:42
generated by, probably in Europe.
02:25:46
It was by modern tooling.
02:25:49
And to imitate these these fakes by Boban.
02:25:55
So I wear a fake
02:25:58
crystal skull as if there is a real crystal skull.
02:26:01
Is this what, what what do you say saying there, Gary?
02:26:05
I buy Boban.
02:26:09
Bilbo Baggins.
02:26:11
Fakes by Boban
02:26:13
bigger and begin to dig in the big bag in the wagon for fun.
02:26:17
If there were going to Bilbo Baggins information rich skulls,
02:26:23
it appears it was all a hoax.
02:26:27
As above.
02:26:28
No, no, no, you don't believe that
02:26:31
you're a hoax, motherfucker.
02:26:33
And also, you forgot to add or connect the whole thing that they sold.
02:26:37
Basically, on the back of.
02:26:40
Or I don't know the timeline at all, so I could be wrong.
02:26:42
Indiana Jones the story is not the story
02:26:44
of Indiana Jones and the Crystal skull, or something like,
02:26:48
I've yet to see those movies.
02:26:52
Yeah.
02:26:53
Me too, which is weird, because I loved Indiana.
02:26:55
Seriously, you've never seen those?
02:26:57
I've never met another person in the world that has not seen Indiana.
02:26:59
No, I've never seen any of the arguments like, yes, you have Jones movies.
02:27:04
I could explain the whole first one to you because I know the plot,
02:27:06
but I've never seen it.
02:27:08
I've seen pieces of it on cable, like, oh, hey, look, it's Indiana Jones.
02:27:11
I'll try watching it. I've seen the first three.
02:27:14
I just haven't seen anything after that.
02:27:16
Well, you saw the first three.
02:27:19
Wait, what?
02:27:22
I haven't seen any of them,
02:27:24
but anything. Period.
02:27:27
Any of the Lost Ark. Temple of doom.
02:27:29
What's the other one? Last crusade?
02:27:32
Those are the first original.
02:27:33
Those are the first three. And then I have.
02:27:35
There was a large gap, and then they came out with the newer ones.
02:27:40
So you're saying you saw the old ones, but you have not seen the new one?
02:27:42
I have yet to see any. Yeah.
02:27:45
Is like Star Wars, but
02:27:46
at the same time, I tried and I, I failed.
02:27:50
I need to go back to it.
02:27:51
Actually, I was trying to watch all the way through Star Wars,
02:27:55
but doing it based on the mission, the movie, the storyline.
02:28:00
Yeah, the machete way. It's way better.
02:28:02
And it's, it's horrible because you go from, like,
02:28:06
really good shit to shitty shit.
02:28:08
You know what I mean? Like the.
02:28:09
No, you can you can fix action values and don't watch when it gets to be one.
02:28:13
Don't watch one or wait to start with to watch them all.
02:28:16
You have to watch them. No, you don't see. That's again.
02:28:18
That's you're not thinking. You don't.
02:28:21
You don't have to be. You're you're being
02:28:25
you're being,
02:28:29
No, to
02:28:32
no is to be a nerd because, you know, it's not a nerd.
02:28:34
You have to watch. No, I say I like it, I like it. It's.
02:28:37
It's like the child's version of being.
02:28:38
See, ruins. The the ruins.
02:28:40
The same demographic that likes Rube Goldberg machines.
02:28:43
Likes episode one, is what I'm saying.
02:28:46
Well, yeah, children, but you can take it out and.
02:28:52
Whatsoever.
02:28:52
You missed nothing.
02:28:54
Seeing him as a cute little kid, you can be like, hey, Darth
02:28:56
Vader used to be a cute little kid, okay? And then that's it.
02:28:59
Oh, well, he came in the later movie of some fagot
02:29:02
to some fagot teenager, if that's how you feel.
02:29:05
I'm not some fagot young adult.
02:29:08
How do you really feel? Oh. Oh,
02:29:11
me. That's a that's how I feel.
02:29:16
Draw.
02:29:18
It's pretty crazy, but,
02:29:21
to that.
02:29:24
We got anything left for you to.
02:29:25
We got to keep the show moving so that, that Sydney Sweeney commercial.
02:29:30
Yeah, let's talk about that.
02:29:32
We do. We did we discuss that or. No.
02:29:34
In depth.
02:29:35
Yeah.
02:29:35
So I don't I means that's the problem.
02:29:39
I was watching TV just this afternoon and I don't this isn't a
02:29:44
brand new commercial.
02:29:46
But this struck me as, And I don't see how this is
02:29:48
not reverse reverse racism. Right.
02:29:52
So there's no such thing.
02:29:55
Still looking for the new job?
02:29:56
Well, it's funny you mentioned that.
02:29:58
Just found out my dad's sister's husband is golfing buddies
02:30:01
with a friend who's a neighbor of a guy who's a CEO of a great company.
02:30:05
So basically, it's a lock.
02:30:07
Sounds promising.
02:30:08
Right? This nepotism or racism?
02:30:10
Yes. Yeah. You get it.
02:30:15
Indeed.
02:30:16
Helps you match based on what you know, not who you know.
02:30:19
Oh thank goodness, because I have no idea who that guy is.
02:30:23
I could tell.
02:30:25
So you don't see the racism there,
02:30:29
right?
02:30:29
Are you implying a woman was black?
02:30:32
Well, they're trying to make this the white guy
02:30:34
look like a privileged white guy because his dad's friend's golf
02:30:37
buddy got him a job, and she's just, like, in someone's job.
02:30:42
Well, it's funny you mentioned that.
02:30:43
I just found out my dad's sister's husband is golfing buddies
02:30:46
with a friend who's a neighbor of a guy who see that that look is.
02:30:50
Oh, that your dead sister's husband?
02:30:54
Privileged white guy.
02:30:56
Yeah, but she's not black enough to think that she's a privileged black lady.
02:31:01
She's like the CEO of caramel color.
02:31:03
But basically, it's a lot like sounds from black Ladies, right?
02:31:07
That's what my mom said. Yes.
02:31:09
Yeah. Then that's what my mom said.
02:31:10
That's going off of a white stereotype.
02:31:13
Mama's boy.
02:31:14
She's like, yeah, no, black people are way more mama's boys than white people.
02:31:18
Oh, indeed.
02:31:19
Helps you match based on what you know.
02:31:21
So then this is the killer.
02:31:22
This is the last of the goodness.
02:31:24
Because I have no idea who that guy is, I could tell.
02:31:27
Well, you know, that was an it was it to match based on
02:31:31
and what, you know, where was.
02:31:32
Yeah, exactly.
02:31:33
Yes. I find myself asking.
02:31:36
Yeah.
02:31:36
So the you get it and she's like yeah. No.
02:31:39
So he's basically saying, look I have all this privilege,
02:31:41
you know, getting all these opportunities. And she's like, no, I'm black.
02:31:44
I don't get that stuff. You know, it's like,
02:31:48
you don't see that
02:31:49
I, I would if she was black.
02:31:51
Still looking for the new job. Think she's black?
02:31:53
Well, it's not like that.
02:31:55
Just found out my dad's sister's husband is golfing buddies
02:31:58
with a friend who's of a guy who's a symbol of a great company.
02:32:01
So basically, it's a lock.
02:32:03
Sounds promising. Right?
02:32:05
That's what my mom said. Yes.
02:32:07
Yeah, you get it?
02:32:11
Indeed. Helps you match.
02:32:13
Based on what?
02:32:13
You know, it's a dear white people.
02:32:16
Oh thank goodness is that they're the only ones like them.
02:32:19
It's like it's connections and like, nope, no good people.
02:32:22
Jobs and stuff. No, it's the you're missing.
02:32:24
You're you're the only ones with jobs.
02:32:26
They're the only ones who play golf.
02:32:28
The only ones at work. I'll tell you that.
02:32:31
I'm just kidding.
02:32:32
I work with a lot of.
02:32:34
Yeah, those people, the, What?
02:32:39
The Iraq ians work very hard. What?
02:32:42
So I've heard.
02:32:45
Speaking of the Chaldeans.
02:32:48
The Chaldeans. I've heard work
02:32:50
very hard.
02:32:54
I said the Mexicans work very hard.
02:32:56
I said, speaking of black people.
02:32:59
What the fuck starts a conversation like that?
02:33:02
They work very hard to.
02:33:03
So, have we ever talked about Phoenix Jones on the show?
02:33:06
I swear you brought them up. But then again, I thought you like holiday.
02:33:09
And so, I don't know, Phoenix Jones or
02:33:15
is it a superhero?
02:33:17
Phoenix Jones is a real life superhero.
02:33:19
Super problem.
02:33:20
The same real life superheroes we introduced you to in November
02:33:23
are now stirring up trouble for Seattle.
02:33:25
Shit coming up. Trouble.
02:33:27
Crime Saturday night. Come. Of course.
02:33:29
Luke DC, talk to the self-appointed crusader Phoenix Jones.
02:33:33
Phoenix Jones calls himself a crime fighter.
02:33:36
He's the man who dresses up and patrols the streets at night.
02:33:38
I endanger my life with a reason and a purpose.
02:33:41
But a man held him a reason. And a purpose.
02:33:43
Kicked him and broke his nose.
02:33:45
That's under my eye.
02:33:46
Over here on this I can see your eyes so slowly.
02:33:48
And now police say enough is enough of swallowing that's going to end up dead.
02:33:52
Don't insert yourself into those situations.
02:33:54
If you see something called nine and one,
02:33:58
it happens in the film.
02:33:59
Now they're all swearing at each other.
02:34:01
And like tonight, Phoenix broke up a brawl
02:34:03
and one of the guys turned on him, and he starts swinging on me.
02:34:06
And try to start an altercation with me.
02:34:08
So Phoenix called 911, put the guy in a hold and waited for police to arrive.
02:34:13
But this guy Paul is the scene there.
02:34:16
I'm still holding this guy down. And that's when.
02:34:18
That's when the second guy came up and said, I got a gun.
02:34:21
Yeah, I want is like,
02:34:24
spider man, hold the guy down and,
02:34:28
or have the police come and tell you he doesn't lie.
02:34:31
He ties him up with his web and then ties him up.
02:34:33
He doesn't just, like, hold them down.
02:34:36
He doesn't just, like, let the police do all the hard work.
02:34:39
He presents it to the police.
02:34:40
He doesn't go.
02:34:41
No, no, I got him.
02:34:42
You do the rest.
02:34:43
So, I mean, I guess we could debate his crime
02:34:48
fighting skills, but by his casting and his actions,
02:34:50
you really can't argue that he's claiming to be a superhero.
02:34:53
A good guy, right?
02:34:54
He agrees, trying to be a good guy from the the perception, the character.
02:34:59
Sort of the actor, I guess
02:35:01
you should take his, mask into his suit there.
02:35:04
Look.
02:35:04
Yeah.
02:35:05
Otherwise his suit is tucked into his mask.
02:35:07
So in 2011, he was.
02:35:10
He was arguing or arguably a superhero doing the right thing.
02:35:14
He went through all kinds of turmoil.
02:35:15
I've seen this guy in the news many times.
02:35:17
One time he was shooting and I'm sorry he was.
02:35:20
He got shot because he was protecting somebody.
02:35:23
All kinds of good stories that bulletproof his armor.
02:35:28
I think maybe, Morgan Freeman in the lab.
02:35:30
Yeah, he's kind of.
02:35:32
He's kind of copying it.
02:35:34
It definitely looks like Wolverine meets, Batman now.
02:35:37
So, any forward to today?
02:35:42
I super thin guy in Seattle, Washington.
02:35:46
Not to be.
02:35:46
Just to reiterate, that video was from 2011.
02:35:49
He's been doing this for that long. It's not the same guy.
02:35:51
It's a look at the he's a black guy
02:35:55
about 2011 and Ben Fodor.
02:35:58
Oh yeah. One brother named Carlos.
02:36:01
He's the other fucking he looks like every character black guy
02:36:04
from every boxing, every fighting game that I played at the arcade.
02:36:10
That's racist.
02:36:12
All right, dude, he's got pork chops and a flat top.
02:36:16
I mean, he had one brother named Carlos.
02:36:18
The two of them became obsessed with me.
02:36:21
They got pretty good.
02:36:22
They both went pro.
02:36:23
And one night he is walking back to his car in Seattle with one of his sons.
02:36:26
Someone had broken into his car and shattered the window.
02:36:29
Dude. Origin story.
02:36:31
This is the Phoenix Jones origin story.
02:36:34
Son trips in the glass pile and cuts himself pretty bad.
02:36:38
And that moment Ben Foster vowed to his son.
02:36:41
It's like he's like, I will never allow anything like this to come upon you again.
02:36:43
That's a little less dramatic than I thought it was going to be.
02:36:46
So the next weekend he bought a breakaway tuxedo, starts climbing, fire escapes,
02:36:50
and he sits on the roof,
02:36:52
and he's just watching the streets at night for muggings and fights.
02:36:56
And when he sees them, he just turns and he runs down the street.
02:36:59
So he just goes and monster mugger
02:37:02
and just holds him down until the police show up.
02:37:03
And so he has a good reputation.
02:37:05
Allegedly, he has helped lead police
02:37:07
to so many legendary arrests over the course of his 122 cities.
02:37:11
I captured him for their campaign.
02:37:12
So he's doing their don't do drugs
02:37:14
as if they're going to be, like,
02:37:15
held accountable for the statements in court
02:37:17
about how many arrests he's been a part of.
02:37:20
He's such a hero, allegedly part of the community, part of the help or whatever.
02:37:24
They're not saying don't be a vigilante.
02:37:25
They literally recruit the guy as the don't do drugs fucking poster boy.
02:37:30
Literally. He's on posters.
02:37:32
Phoenix Jones says, don't do drugs.
02:37:34
This part here is crucial for the next part of the story, this campaign.
02:37:38
But over time, this reputation sort of started to sour.
02:37:42
He had come across a group that was dancing in an alleyway
02:37:45
that he mistook for a fight, and so he ran into this alleyway,
02:37:49
mistake.
02:37:50
The perception wasn't great.
02:37:51
And so Phoenix concludes, the only thing to help
02:37:54
he hold the pepper spray on him, not realizing.
02:37:57
So here's the fun part is, I can't think of what you would.
02:38:02
So they claim that after after he stopped a dance group and he.
02:38:05
I don't know if he hurt them or not, but they were not doing anything wrong.
02:38:08
They were literally acting like they were fighting in some weird dance stage thing.
02:38:12
He held a press conference which I am unable to find.
02:38:14
I would love to see his press conference.
02:38:17
They took it seriously.
02:38:18
Y'all is at the stairs just doing his full armor.
02:38:21
All right.
02:38:22
It's like I've realized the matrix routine shit.
02:38:24
And he comes in thinking that it's real is.
02:38:27
And there's a dramatic pause that takes off as mask.
02:38:30
Oh, it's it's he's like, I am Phoenix Jones.
02:38:33
My name is Ben Fodor. I'm just like all of you.
02:38:35
And then he dramatically walks away
02:38:37
from the podium and just leaves the public perception
02:38:39
kind of turn around a little bit.
02:38:40
So then there was a moment where everything just kind of spiraled.
02:38:42
One day it was an average night.
02:38:44
They were out fighting crime, and while they were chasing this guy,
02:38:46
there was a Drive-By shooting
02:38:47
and one of the stray shots hit a 21 year old girl and killed her.
02:38:51
And he's blamed himself for that girl's death ever since then.
02:38:54
A couple years after that, he actually.
02:38:57
Here's where it gets super interesting.
02:38:59
Seattle superhero Phoenix Jones charged after undercover
02:39:04
is called charged after undercover drug bust.
02:39:08
He was arrested in a sting operation.
02:39:10
The police got him on drug dealing.
02:39:13
So he was fighting the drug things, taking the drugs and reselling on.
02:39:17
Apparently, the whole time he had been dealing cocaine,
02:39:19
Molly shrooms, putting his competition behind bars and dealing drugs.
02:39:23
The whole time he goes to jail and is like, hey guys,
02:39:27
he was the villain the whole time.
02:39:29
There are no heroes.
02:39:32
That's so profound.
02:39:34
I watched the whole thing.
02:39:36
I remember him not in 2011, but more recently.
02:39:41
But, you know, a few years ago
02:39:43
thinking that, I couldn't believe that they weren't stopping him.
02:39:45
What a great.
02:39:47
I wonder if he was even buying off the cops with the money
02:39:49
he was making from the drugs because they don't want competition.
02:39:52
He didn't want competition either.
02:39:53
Apparently he wasn't just picking random thugs, he was. Yeah,
02:39:58
I go on record as saying, did you refrigerate those?
02:40:01
Why not?
02:40:02
I mean, they're butter, they're peanut butter.
02:40:05
It's just sort of the children and the cardboard and plastic magically
02:40:08
keeps the air away from it and keeps it from rotting.
02:40:10
Is that how that was?
02:40:11
It was beautiful. Look at those beautiful queer children.
02:40:14
As a musician, all I want to know is what that song plays on the back.
02:40:19
There's six notes
02:40:20
and I need to know what they are so I can hear it otherwise.
02:40:23
Because, like, if I made a box like that, I know that if you see any notes
02:40:26
and fladge rants, there is a hidden meaning behind it.
02:40:28
You can play it and either open some door, add
02:40:30
some racist song or some fucking inside joke.
02:40:33
I would not just put three random notes on a on a tagalongs box.
02:40:39
Is there a Girl Scout theme?
02:40:42
No. I do wonder,
02:40:43
is it that with the music you make me,
02:40:47
Phoenix Jones is a piece of shit
02:40:50
stealing the drugs from his drug dealers and then
02:40:54
selling the drugs?
02:40:56
Phoenix Jones, you're fired.
02:41:01
Segue.
02:41:05
You like the new WNBA logo? No.
02:41:10
How about the one you made or.
02:41:12
I didn't make the posted it.
02:41:20
I like that this.
02:41:21
I like that this one highlights that it's.
02:41:24
Sorry.
02:41:24
What can you even my brother found it or my brother made it.
02:41:28
I like that
02:41:28
this one highlights the green color more so it makes it much more topical.
02:41:32
But putting someone on the other hand with the ball.
02:41:35
I mean, are they supposed to be? That's three balls.
02:41:38
You have to juggle three balls.
02:41:42
Well, I actually
02:41:42
thought of that joke that that didn't land
02:41:46
all right. No.
02:41:49
All right.
02:41:50
Oh, shit. I'm not supposed to show that. I don't look at that.
02:41:53
But you thought of a joke
02:41:55
that's put your phone on the ground.
02:41:56
So real good to share.
02:41:58
So I'm going to give the kid a call now.
02:42:02
What, what do you think of all these dildos
02:42:05
that are going on the court?
02:42:09
Do you think that they, they banned, bags?
02:42:14
Yeah, but then two more came in, so.
02:42:16
Yeah. Right. So where are they stashing them?
02:42:17
As if you can't just put it in your waistband or, you know, somewhere
02:42:20
where else
02:42:22
do these, do they know if there's any
02:42:25
remnants on these pillows when they come flying on the court?
02:42:33
And they keep grabbing them with towels.
02:42:34
The first one he grabbed,
02:42:35
now that he looked at it, inspected it, they had no idea what the first one
02:42:39
was not going to protect you from, like, sure it will.
02:42:42
Pathogen. It'll help.
02:42:44
It'll be a brief buffer.
02:42:46
But if it's.
02:42:47
He threw the towel on top, picks it up and went to,
02:42:51
He threw the towel and Ivan dove over it. No.
02:42:55
Yeah, I don't think.
02:42:56
I don't think it should, stop.
02:42:58
Honestly.
02:43:00
I mean, they've been bitching about not getting paid what they're worth.
02:43:04
Am I the only one that's thinking they're finally
02:43:06
they could sell those and offset the cost that they're not getting paid.
02:43:09
They're just throwing them in the garbage.
02:43:10
It's a waste of a revenue stream, a brand new deal though.
02:43:14
I don't even think of branding.
02:43:15
And I just thought keeping the deal, those that are being thrown
02:43:18
and selling, not they wouldn't be just sold as a dildo.
02:43:21
They're sold as the famous dildo. Like jerseys and stuff.
02:43:24
Like a hat trick in hockey where you're like, no, like that stuff there.
02:43:28
Yeah.
02:43:28
Like you to know, like, if you get a hat, if you get a hat trick in hockey,
02:43:31
then you sell the stick that you scored the hat trick with
02:43:33
for $4,000, and people's sports fans buy it, you sign it.
02:43:37
So Sophie Cunningham should sign the dildo and they should sell that dildo,
02:43:40
is what I'm saying.
02:43:42
They're missing out on a branding and a marketing opportunity.
02:43:47
I would you all right, so when I,
02:43:50
I had a bat when I was a kid signed by a bunch of people and I never thought
02:43:53
like a, like an animal bat, I was like, what?
02:43:56
No. A bat and baseball bat.
02:43:57
And I never thought.
02:43:59
And I never thought about shoving it up my vagina or hitting a ball with it.
02:44:04
If you got a dildo thrown out and then got it signed by Sophie
02:44:07
Cunningham, would you stick it in Gary's ass
02:44:10
or would you say, no, this is a sign and I want to keep it special?
02:44:12
Or would it be more special?
02:44:17
I don't know the answer to any of those questions,
02:44:18
but if you want to find out the answer you're going to have to follow us
02:44:21
over to Rumble because you know they're missing opportunity or YouTube.
02:44:25
So yeah. Could take that deal though.
02:44:28
Have the teams sign it and then sell auctioned off for charity.
02:44:33
That's what I just said.
02:44:34
Yeah they could do that.
02:44:36
I just came up with it. I said, keep the money, I didn't.
02:44:38
You're more charitable guy. Yeah.
02:44:41
Or I'm, I'm better,
02:44:44
more wholesome.
02:44:45
That word I'm trying to think of
02:44:48
philanthropy.
02:44:48
This is pick
02:44:51
before we did before across a little room over to one
02:44:53
last toast reference over.
02:44:56
This guy is about to break the laws of physics by taping together
02:44:59
a pair of sneakers.
02:45:01
This guy is about to break the laws of physics by taping together
02:45:04
a pair of sneakers and a piece of raw toast with some jam on it.
02:45:08
So by now, most of the internet knows that if you drop a pair of vans
02:45:11
on the ground, they'll end up landing right side up 100% of the time.
02:45:15
But on the flip side, whenever you drop food on the ground,
02:45:18
it will always land on its face and end up ruining your meal.
02:45:21
But what happens if you put the two of them together?
02:45:23
What way will they land?
02:45:27
But when they land on the side
02:45:30
when?
02:45:30
So yeah.
02:45:33
No, I mean, they'll probably bounce.
02:45:35
They'll they'll
02:45:36
put a big splotch on the floor and then still flip because it's a shoe.
02:45:39
It's not it's not at all any way symmetrical.
02:45:42
So it's going to be a little chaotic.
02:45:44
It's going to land different every time, which could be calculable easily
02:45:48
with a computer. But I don't know. It's a duct tape.
02:45:50
It's pretty like weighted as well, I don't think jelly weight's toast enough.
02:45:56
I argue with this premise that toast always lands butter or jelly down. No.
02:46:00
It's stupid. That's not there. It's so dumb.
02:46:02
But that's why I didn't bring it to the show.
02:46:04
But that's obvious.
02:46:06
Is based on, like, some dumb
02:46:09
other principle that when it comes off right, the is one thing
02:46:12
and raw toast doesn't because it comes off because it comes off.
02:46:15
It comes off a thing. So it tends to tip.
02:46:18
That's what they say.
02:46:19
Not like oh, one side which is to spin the side is going to go down first.
02:46:23
I'm just hoping they made up something comedic.
02:46:25
And it doesn't just go and then it's over.
02:46:28
Me too, because I didn't watch this.
02:46:30
Like the dog comes in and licks it and starts a whole Rube Goldberg, Oh no.
02:46:35
This guy is about to break the laws and landed by taping together.
02:46:38
Oh. Things happen exactly.
02:46:40
Raw toast with some.
02:46:41
Oh, actually, yeah, both the internet knows that if you drop a pin
02:46:45
point lands on the ground, they'll end up landing right side up, end up ruined.
02:46:48
What way will they land?
02:46:53
So. Brilliant marketing idea.
02:46:57
You need to get flexible tape or something to show you that you can even break.
02:47:01
It's so strong.
02:47:02
It even breaks myths.
02:47:07
That didn't happen.
02:47:08
There.
02:47:17
Hey. You hungry?
02:47:18
Want me to make you some pasta?
02:47:21
Wait. What?
02:47:22
No way. Man.
02:47:24
Oh, we used to make a pasta bumper.
02:47:26
I started playing this.
02:47:27
You thought? Wait, we did all the sandwich segments.
02:47:29
This can't possibly be right.
02:47:30
He's playing another one.
02:47:31
He's not making any sense.
02:47:34
Let's just dive on that for a second.
02:47:38
I think you're cooking.
02:47:39
Course. I think she's eyeing her body.
02:47:42
She looks completely different.
02:47:44
I'm hungry. Hungry?
02:47:46
Let me make you some pasta.
02:47:48
She also changed her clothes.
02:47:51
And it was confusing because you played it perfect.
02:47:53
I heard her say so.
02:47:54
Yeah, it was fucking weird.
02:47:56
Hey. You hungry? Want me to make you some pasta?
02:48:00
I don't, I hate pasta.
02:48:02
Pasta is a sugar carb waste of fucking food,
02:48:04
and it makes you sleepy and just sluggish and horrible.
02:48:07
It's a waste of energy to eat pasta that's coming from an Italian.
02:48:17
I do, my wife just got one of those.
02:48:20
I forgot what she called it.
02:48:21
It's not a food processor.
02:48:23
It's not a blender.
02:48:23
It's somewhere in between.
02:48:25
And it does really cool.
02:48:25
Shit food blend processors.
02:48:29
No, I don't, find out what it's called, but I don't know what them.
02:48:34
Whenever she home on. Whenever she does.
02:48:35
Yeah, well, if anything, she always stares at the camera.
02:48:39
Any other time, she does not stare at the camera.
02:48:41
She did it earlier.
02:48:42
She stared at the camera, but she does not stare at the camera any other time.
02:48:45
Let me explain. Flirting and sexual and you. Innuendo.
02:48:47
Innuendo for you young fool that doesn't know what the fuck.
02:48:51
So imagine then her head.
02:48:53
She has her hands. You know what she's doing?
02:48:55
Which is.
02:48:56
Yeah.
02:48:56
She doesn't have her hand wrapped around the pepper.
02:48:59
Mill.
02:49:00
She has them wrapped around you at that moment when she stares at you.
02:49:03
Do you know how I know this?
02:49:05
Because of the disgusting, slutty comment that she makes right after?
02:49:08
Listen close.
02:49:12
Where does that sound remind you of?
02:49:15
There.
02:49:24
What's that sound?
02:49:24
Remind you that, If that's what you're or sounds like, lady Frey,
02:49:30
she's really turned on.
02:49:35
It happens sometimes. No.
02:49:39
Some more going on there. Yeah.
02:49:40
Wait, what? What what is. She's asking the question.
02:49:43
I mean, we're making assumptions.
02:49:44
What does that sound remind you of?
02:49:46
You making pasta is what I would say to my wife.
02:49:49
What the fuck?
02:49:50
What do you mean?
02:49:53
Very loose vagina.
02:49:55
I've noticed that her.
02:49:56
The videos that rise to the top.
02:49:57
The harder her nipple is, the harder it is.
02:49:59
I mean, the the harder her nipples. Hungry?
02:50:02
Are you make you sandwich?
02:50:03
Oh, don't worry,
02:50:05
on the list.
02:50:08
Stay hungry or you make your sandwich.
02:50:10
Oh, don't worry for I sandwiches.
02:50:11
What is it with you? Your fix or fucked sandwiches?
02:50:14
Stupid fuck.
02:50:17
Did you hit that?
02:50:18
Because I.
02:50:19
And I don't think I hit that, but maybe I hit it.
02:50:23
There you go.
02:50:25
But what do you think of these weird plate bowls?
02:50:26
I is it just for presentation.
02:50:29
Wasted space makes me hungry.
02:50:32
Like I didn't eat enough food.
02:50:33
My plate was half empty.
02:50:35
I actually do just the opposite.
02:50:37
I take smaller plates and then I feel full.
02:50:39
Like I ate a full plate.
02:50:41
I didn't know that.
02:50:42
There's a stupid plate that goes underneath the other plates.
02:50:44
It's called a charger.
02:50:45
So no, it's called a saucer.
02:50:48
No, it's like a charger.
02:50:49
It says that it's set on the fucking back.
02:50:52
When you turned it over, the fucking stick.
02:50:55
I didn't turn it off when I turned it over.
02:50:56
Don't bring me into this stupid concept.
02:50:59
Oh, God, was that me?
02:51:01
Shut up.
02:51:02
Charger sounds like something you either drive or put your phone into.
02:51:10
Are we doing any deer flags?
02:51:12
Put your phone into a charger.
02:51:13
How does that make sense?
02:51:15
Yeah, but my phone into a charger. What do you do?
02:51:17
Plug it in like a fucking 2008.
02:51:19
I plug my charger into my phone.
02:51:22
Well, you're fucking 2018.
02:51:25
Do you put it inside of a charger?
02:51:28
You put your phone so you can't, like, even touch it or hold it.
02:51:30
It's going to be inside of a device. Weird.
02:51:33
I can touch it or hold it
02:51:35
and get your hold right now.
02:51:38
Draw.
02:51:40
It's pretty crazy, but,
02:51:48
Got any of those?
02:51:49
I don't know, that's actually the one thing I didn't prepare.
02:51:52
That's great.
02:51:52
We don't need it.
02:51:56
Disclaimer the unfiltered and crude proclamation of devil speech,
02:51:58
folks, listen up
02:51:59
before we dive deeper into the circus of clueless and uncensored,
02:52:02
here's our no nonsense disclaimer served with a side of white humor.
02:52:04
Look, we're here for the time. Not a different time, all right?
02:52:06
In this crazy world where snowflakes and debris. Critic.
02:52:09
We're just trying to spread some joined up stepping on too many toes.
02:52:11
So here's the article.
02:52:12
Let's get this algebra of our discourse from guest host or any random.
02:52:15
My mom is to tickle your funny bone, choose your gray
02:52:17
matter, and illuminate the path to a mirthful existence.
02:52:19
Any semblance of seriousness is accidental.
02:52:21
Article to everyone equally we're equal gibber offenders.
02:52:24
All right.
02:52:24
We don't give a hoot about your gibberish
02:52:25
race, religion, or whether you prefer cats or dogs. We're here to roast everyone
02:52:28
from politicians to gibberish our own sorry selves.
02:52:30
No say, not even grandmotherly like article three.
02:52:32
Screw political jabber person.
02:52:33
We ain't here to hold your hand or jabber anything.
02:52:35
So if our jabber find you,
02:52:37
we're not responsible for any ruffled feathers or jibber feelings.
02:52:39
But hey, if you can take the heat, we promise we'll dish out some belly
02:52:41
laughs and maybe a couple of different articles.
02:52:43
Fake news alert
02:52:44
the tales, rumors, and downright lies with you here on is a $3 bill.
02:52:47
Any resemblance to real life events are people,
02:52:49
whether alive or pushing up daisies is purely gibberish
02:52:51
and probably a result of us hitting the bottle too hard.
02:52:53
We're pretty sure the earth is round, but jabber cares.
02:52:56
Article de jabber.
02:52:57
Cause why not parody and gibber our bread and butter folks?
02:53:00
Any likeness to actual people or characters is just us having a laugh,
02:53:03
not a reason for a jabber.
02:53:04
We might not be the smartest people in the job,
02:53:06
but we sure know how to stir up some trouble.
02:53:07
So in closing, if you've made it this far without getting your undies in a row,
02:53:10
then congrats! You're our kind of people.
02:53:12
We're just here to crack a few tasteless jokes, spread some jabber joy,
02:53:15
and remind everyone that life's too short to be serious all the freakin time.
02:53:19
So buckle up,
02:53:19
buttercup, and get ready for a wild ride through the absurdity of our human
02:53:22
language rants, life.
02:53:39
Ladies and gentlemen,
02:53:41
let's get ready to.
02:53:48
Rumble!
02:53:48
I hope that you're ready to rumble.
02:53:50
I hope you're ready to rumble.
02:53:53
Oh, what's.
02:53:55
Oh, hello.
02:53:58
I. Miss.
02:54:02
No no no no no no.
02:54:05
Whoa whoa whoa.
02:54:08
Hi, guys.
02:54:10
I know, I know, I, I love to back.
02:54:15
Okay, okay.
02:54:16
Next up, let's have a look on.
02:54:27
Halloween.
02:54:27
Shall I say?
02:54:34
I first I thought that lady
02:54:36
didn't know what she was saying, but pretty sure she knew.
02:54:41
And all I have to say to
02:54:42
that is what she's saying.
02:54:45
She said, Heil Hitler.
02:54:47
Hitler's bad.
02:54:50
Just in case anybody was wondering.
02:54:52
So, back to the dildos.
02:54:53
We got to go to the dildos.
02:54:54
We have to go to the dildos.
02:54:57
So you reported that a dildo was thrown on last week's show?
02:55:00
I recall the 2222222 dildos.
02:55:04
So Sophie Cunningham, who, as you know.
02:55:06
So hold on, hold on.
02:55:07
Oh, I can't hold on. I'm floating.
02:55:10
I know, I'm sorry.
02:55:11
Okay. We actually have originated
02:55:15
that.
02:55:17
We have flat trans.
02:55:18
We always do everything. First. This was we were.
02:55:20
Yeah, I know, I know.
02:55:21
Well, we're Brady and I love the green dildo.
02:55:26
I love that green doga we had.
02:55:29
We were Greendale doing before.
02:55:31
Greendale doing was a thing,
02:55:33
my lord, we were.
02:55:34
So we're so played out on Greendale, though.
02:55:37
Okay, continue.
02:55:38
Do you think women secretly sexually fantasize about aliens?
02:55:42
That's not Greendale.
02:55:43
Those neon green or Kermit the Frog
02:55:46
or Shrek anyways, So.
02:55:49
Yeah.
02:55:49
So you two two dildos reported last week thrown on the old Arthur.
02:55:54
There it is. That's it.
02:55:55
There it is. We Greendale.
02:55:56
Dude, we were amazing.
02:55:57
I love that green. Bilbo.
02:55:59
Sophie Cunningham, who I reported on the show
02:56:02
as being the enforcer for, who's the woman?
02:56:06
Caitlin Clark, I think.
02:56:08
Sure.
02:56:10
Okay.
02:56:10
Caitlin Clark is getting roughed up by older WNBA
02:56:13
players, and Sophie Cunningham finally had enough.
02:56:15
And Sophie Cunningham also was the one
02:56:17
that stuck her crotch into the cameraman's face.
02:56:19
So we know her on the show.
02:56:20
Oh yeah. That really attracted I mean know really good.
02:56:23
Yeah yeah yeah like her.
02:56:24
So she comes out she comes out on Twitter X where we can just call Twix I guess.
02:56:30
Sophie Cunningham, stop throwing dildos on the court.
02:56:32
You're going to hurt one of us, she pleads.
02:56:34
On August 1st.
02:56:36
She pleads with people.
02:56:37
On August 1st. Please don't
02:56:41
throw dildos.
02:56:42
Somebody's going to get hurt.
02:56:44
I should have had the other video cued up.
02:56:45
Why don't I?
02:56:47
I mean, you could trip, I want. Sure.
02:56:49
Damn.
02:56:50
I'm gonna have to find the other video. It's a fun one.
02:56:52
You can fall in one.
02:56:54
Here it is.
02:56:55
Okay.
02:56:56
And also, if you notice a little foreshadowing,
02:57:00
she already replied to her own letter saying we
02:57:03
five shadowing she art.
02:57:05
That's reminds me of a beard.
02:57:06
Different from that.
02:57:07
That's different NBA players. Right.
02:57:10
She said this didn't age well.
02:57:11
The reason being is because
02:57:15
the her the third time.
02:57:18
So her.
02:57:20
So when you when you see this stop throwing dildos on the court
02:57:23
in your what more than 25 years old.
02:57:26
So you're like more on the mature side of the population.
02:57:30
What do you hear when you hear a professional probably spoiled
02:57:33
athletes say, don't do something.
02:57:38
Okay,
02:57:39
so what's the what are what are these people being charged with?
02:57:43
What's the.
02:57:43
Because if you do hurt a player, that could be a big deal. But
02:57:47
if you're under age and that would be the thing.
02:57:49
Like if I had a kid, but I want to throw a dildo on the court,
02:57:52
I would take my kid there and be like, hey, throw the deal on the court
02:57:54
because you're going to get away with this.
02:57:56
Look, I'm like, you're underage.
02:57:58
I'm making the finger go up.
02:57:59
Sophie Cunningham oh, yeah, I'd like to do that.
02:58:02
I'm going to click right on it.
02:58:03
We're going to see what happens for now, this is the game following.
02:58:08
When she went on X and pleaded for the way you clicked.
02:58:10
You clicked right on her butt.
02:58:12
And guess what happened right when you did that?
02:58:15
Please stop.
02:58:18
Women don't fart off.
02:58:21
Okay, so they made a basket.
02:58:23
Now her team is about to get the ball.
02:58:25
I know a little bit about basketball.
02:58:26
So the dark blue team is going to get the ball rolling.
02:58:28
Sophie Cunningham is right here.
02:58:30
Keep an eye on Sophie Cunningham right here.
02:58:32
She's the one on X
02:58:35
and black to me.
02:58:38
She made a plea for everyone to please stop throwing dildos
02:58:40
which is a really weird specific request
02:58:42
to make but understandable with all the action.
02:58:45
Here she is right here.
02:58:46
I'm getting up to the point.
02:58:48
Oh, no. What happened? She just got here.
02:58:50
She jumped. We missed it.
02:58:51
What happened?
02:58:52
Oh, look what's here. What's, What's that?
02:58:55
What's watching?
02:58:56
Oh, wait. I went to the end and got it was green.
02:59:00
I love the green below.
02:59:01
Boom.
02:59:03
What is it? Is that hitting her right there?
02:59:05
So. And I said I was like, wow, strange dude.
02:59:07
That's like crystal skulls type of, coincidence.
02:59:10
That's like, there must be a heaven type coincidence.
02:59:12
Maybe it just fell out of her that did you?
02:59:15
Are we sure you're right, I didn't.
02:59:16
Yeah, we got to see it throwing in the air.
02:59:18
I think that's it right here. Oh, no, wait. That's.
02:59:19
No, that's the basketball. Right. Sorry, I got it mixed up. My deal.
02:59:22
Those are done. That's fine.
02:59:24
It's weird.
02:59:25
She she literally said, please don't throw dildos.
02:59:28
And then the world threw a dildo at her.
02:59:29
And then my wife said, dude, your stupid.
02:59:32
They took that as a challenge.
02:59:33
And they literally were trying to hit her for saying that.
02:59:36
And I was like, wow, that's some
02:59:39
balls
02:59:40
of that. That's pointing at it.
02:59:42
Like the way she jumped there, she was delayed.
02:59:44
Oh, she's like, it touched me. She's like grossed up.
02:59:46
Oh. Look at what? This is the sake of it. Oh.
02:59:49
Oh, you. Oh, it is green. Yeah. It nails.
02:59:52
Love it for.
02:59:56
Oh, the butch ten number ten said we don't want penises around here.
02:59:59
You just don't touch it.
03:00:00
Like, why are you touching it?
03:00:02
Yeah, but she's going to tell you
03:00:04
whatever you're worried about that's going to penetrate.
03:00:06
A tiny cloth towel is going to be stuck to her shoe now.
03:00:08
Yeah.
03:00:08
Now, you know, she's just contaminating the whole fucking an object.
03:00:13
I believe the term you're looking for is manner.
03:00:17
It's like my girlfriend when she makes fucking me or anything.
03:00:20
She doesn't. She looks way too happy.
03:00:24
She's like, that fucking thing just hit me.
03:00:26
And like that hit a player two fourth here before halftime.
03:00:31
I think she gets the hilarity of it.
03:00:33
But at the same time, I think she right there.
03:00:35
She gets mad.
03:00:37
It's going to look even worse.
03:00:38
You know they're trying to get her go.
03:00:40
And I think she knows that.
03:00:41
And she's like no I'm not going to sell for it.
03:00:44
Even though even though she doesn't have to sell for it.
03:00:47
I say lean into it, rub it, make it hard.
03:00:49
So she did she. Yeah. Right.
03:00:51
So on it.
03:00:52
Archer back.
03:00:54
Yeah.
03:00:56
This is taking a turn.
03:00:57
I didn't, I just wanted this to be right in the middle of the ring.
03:01:00
In the middle of the court. I could do that.
03:01:01
You know, the part where it's like it's still out of court.
03:01:05
I'm happy I'm using it.
03:01:08
If I get in trouble for defeating you.
03:01:10
And if it's going to be a human and not some.
03:01:12
I bought computer fucking web page.
03:01:15
I'm just saying, what about porn?
03:01:17
What if that was the porn and it was that realistic?
03:01:19
But you could see something like that.
03:01:22
Okay, sure.
03:01:23
Yeah.
03:01:24
I mean, I don't watch porn, but if I did, that'd be fine.
03:01:30
This has nothing to do with anything.
03:01:32
And it's not.
03:01:33
No, no, the whole show, everything doesn't.
03:01:36
What has it ever really good? Greendale.
03:01:38
I love the green. Dover.
03:01:40
That's not a fair assessment.
03:01:43
It's a poor.
03:01:44
The only difference now is Gary's not coming up
03:01:46
with some stupid topic that we don't talk about.
03:01:48
I'm trying to watch you.
03:01:50
You need to come up with a topic next time I see you're going to say stuff
03:01:53
that week.
03:01:53
No, no one ever.
03:01:55
No. That was the first one I. You.
03:01:57
I'm going to give up.
03:01:58
I've given up now see, that's what you don't know.
03:02:00
See you're talking to run out there.
03:02:02
I'm talking. I'm giving up now.
03:02:03
You know what you're saying. You know what I hear you saying right now?
03:02:06
It's a little bit immature, but it's exactly you guys.
03:02:08
I'm getting him.
03:02:10
Gary! Screw you guys. Hey,
03:02:14
I've tried.
03:02:16
I'm not going home.
03:02:19
Gary is.
03:02:20
Go. Gary goes home.
03:02:21
Gary runs. Gary. Hi. Where's this going?
03:02:24
Oh, I'm on my way.
03:02:26
It saw me.
03:02:33
I compel you the name of Jesus.
03:02:37
Begone, evil spirit.
03:02:40
I added this to your soundtrack.
03:02:42
He's looking for trouble.
03:02:44
Made it more entertaining.
03:02:47
That was fun.
03:02:49
Sequence over here.
03:02:50
No driving around.
03:02:54
Oh, wait. I'm sorry I said he.
03:02:56
It might be gender neutral.
03:02:59
Oh, is he really coming this way?
03:03:00
Is this happening?
03:03:01
Are you kidding me? Oh, string. Right?
03:03:04
Are you kidding me?
03:03:06
Are you kidding me? This is really.
03:03:09
Are you kidding me?
03:03:10
Unbelievable.
03:03:14
Unbelievable.
03:03:15
Spring.
03:03:16
It was unbelievable.
03:03:17
I think it was real.
03:03:18
You could tell by the curve and the the pavement.
03:03:21
It was very unlikely, but it happened.
03:03:23
We just saw it had, like, the curve in it.
03:03:29
And I like the curve in it.
03:03:31
Yeah. Peyronie's disease.
03:03:33
Yeah. But.
03:03:35
Right.
03:03:37
You like the curve.
03:03:39
Yeah.
03:03:40
But you know, like my.
03:03:43
Well please get hit by it.
03:03:45
Yeah.
03:03:46
I got so.
03:03:49
Yeah. Come on. You the force.
03:03:50
Yeah. It's a.
03:03:53
Winner guys I'm.
03:03:55
So you don't listen to me like I don't.
03:04:00
Oh we got got to get.
03:04:03
Let's do this I must get it right.
03:04:05
Like right there.
03:04:07
I'm looking for the good.
03:04:21
Excuse.
03:04:21
It's for the stars.
03:04:24
I you know, he's talking about
03:04:27
class, and yet you just don't get to over and over the.
03:04:30
Yeah.
03:04:32
You think that's why they
03:04:35
get put.
03:04:41
Get to the top.
03:04:45
They have other people.
03:04:46
But I was wasn't I mean, I get in the car.
03:04:49
Yeah. You
03:04:51
know you got to be excited
03:04:55
that things are just got like a 3030. You.
03:05:06
Know she's got.
03:05:09
Your job.
03:05:11
But don't get dirty, Ernie.
03:05:16
That is.
03:05:18
The company that we.
03:05:23
Took with the.
03:05:29
I'm sure it keeps going.
03:05:31
Oh, I'm sure it does.
03:05:32
I'm sure dozens of
03:05:34
the movie theater popcorn.
03:05:35
You go in there and ask for a garbage bag full.
03:05:38
Yeah, that's what I did.
03:05:41
You know what's weird, though, is I've had it for weeks.
03:05:43
Let's go.
03:05:45
Do you have refrigerated? No.
03:05:47
You don't have to refrigerate popcorn.
03:05:49
Just like butter.
03:05:50
But there's butter on it.
03:05:52
No, it's butter flavor.
03:05:54
Why is it still crispy and not stale in any way, shape or form?
03:05:57
Butter flavored.
03:05:59
It's amazing.
03:06:01
It's terrible for you.
03:06:04
It's amazing.
03:06:06
Oh my God, it's amazing.
03:06:09
What the fuck is this?
03:06:10
That's what I want to know. Should we play this?
03:06:12
Are we saving? No saving.
03:06:15
Saving for what?
03:06:16
I don't know, what do you want?
03:06:18
Save it for you.
03:06:20
You're saving for.
03:06:23
See it?
03:06:26
Well, I mean,
03:06:28
save it. See?
03:06:33
Is it?
03:06:34
Did you say Eddie?
03:06:34
I mean, yeah, Eddie, I mean.
03:06:37
Yeah, well, no, because, I mean, it's Gary.
03:06:39
Is Gary ever coming back?
03:06:41
But fuck him if he's not.
03:06:43
But fuck heart
03:06:45
and. Well, I'm sorry.
03:06:47
Let's say the whole thing.
03:06:47
Cheers to Gary.
03:06:49
What is the cheers to Gary?
03:06:51
But he's never coming back.
03:06:53
But fucking heart this you can't see.
03:06:57
I've written without exaggerating.
03:06:59
I've written hundreds of songs and that is the greatest lyric I've ever written.
03:07:05
Cheers to Gary.
03:07:07
I write lyrics all the time.
03:07:08
Cheers to Gary.
03:07:10
But fuck him hard if he's not coming back.
03:07:13
I'm sorry I said it wrong. I screwed it up.
03:07:16
Cheers to Gary.
03:07:18
But fuck him if he's never coming back.
03:07:19
But fuck him hard.
03:07:23
I've never been but fucked.
03:07:24
But I've heard if you don't want to be fucked, it's not pleasant.
03:07:28
So I'm wishing.
03:07:29
I'm wishing unpleasant feelings on him. If he's really.
03:07:31
If he's just stringing us along
03:07:33
because he wants us to keep going without him
03:07:34
and he's never coming back, then this is stupid, I know.
03:07:37
I hate you, too.
03:07:38
This is dumb.
03:07:39
We, It is getting stupid.
03:07:42
I don't know if,
03:07:45
I don't know if I want to keep going forward.
03:07:47
Yeah, well, you can quit next. That's fine.
03:07:50
I'll keep going. I don't need anybody.
03:07:53
I don't know where this is going.
03:07:54
I'm trying to be funny, but it's just been.
03:07:55
I need to play that clip.
03:07:57
You need to now play that clip.
03:08:02
My lord, maybe he could just let us know.
03:08:05
I need to talk to Mrs.
03:08:06
Gary.
03:08:09
I need to talk to her now.
03:08:11
What's the number?
03:08:12
Postal number.
03:08:13
So we all have it.
03:08:18
There's no
03:08:19
way to eat popcorn quietly or pleasantly.
03:08:22
Or this.
03:08:24
No, no, no, my.
03:08:35
You know.
03:08:37
He's got hair.
03:08:38
He likes it. Wait. No! Is that you?
03:08:40
I'm not leaving.
03:08:42
I can't tell who that is. Who?
03:08:44
I'm not leaving. Okay?
03:08:47
They look like the same person.
03:08:48
I'm not fucking leaving.
03:08:49
Thank you for.
03:08:54
Your.
03:08:57
Food.
03:08:58
And the show goes on.
03:09:02
This is my home.
03:09:04
They're gonna need a fucking wrecking ball to take me out of here.
03:09:10
They're gonna need
03:09:11
to send in the National Guard or fucking Swat team,
03:09:15
because I ain't going nowhere. I.
03:09:22
Was that guy for no.
03:09:27
I love his, the one the the kid
03:09:30
he's off is doing the kid the.
03:09:32
It's an Asian thing about bread.
03:09:34
Oh, it's an Asian in the fucking face up on the kid.
03:09:38
I like it because the kid's face.
03:09:40
And like, an Asian hair style.
03:09:42
It looks. It looks like Rob Schneider. Nice.
03:09:45
It is very much looks like Russian.
03:09:51
Oh, no.
03:09:53
We suck again.
03:09:55
Yeah.
03:10:01
I see you see here.
03:10:03
You see, I think I figured it out.
03:10:06
Well,
03:10:07
see, here's the size of my videos.
03:10:10
You see.
03:10:12
Oh, yeah.
03:10:13
See that fills in the screen.
03:10:15
Yeah.
03:10:16
But then here's the size of your video.
03:10:18
Something where.
03:10:19
Oh at knocked out.
03:10:21
That's just how it came from. YouTube.
03:10:23
No, no, this one.
03:10:25
Yeah.
03:10:25
No no no no I did
03:10:28
it's got to be out of place I don't know
03:10:30
I just have some I'm not paying attention to because I don't realize it.
03:10:33
It's important to
03:10:35
well it's not important until.
03:10:39
Right.
03:10:40
Oh my God what.
03:10:45
In all the StreamYard
03:10:46
wisdom, I'm not able to change that or move that.
03:10:50
I'm worried about. Monday.
03:10:52
You know what the bullshit is?
03:10:53
Those are covered up.
03:10:54
I like it.
03:10:55
They don't allow transparent nature.
03:10:59
They don't allow transparent videos. Though.
03:11:00
They should be able to clear to you like an overlay with just the cut out.
03:11:04
Yeah, like you could on anything else.
03:11:07
But clearly
03:11:08
they can do it because there's that's over the else.
03:11:11
Yeah.
03:11:12
Else out.
03:11:15
Shut the fuck up kid.
03:11:18
Like I still it.
03:11:19
All right.
03:11:22
You know, otherwise this,
03:11:24
I don't know what to say.
03:11:26
What?
03:11:27
He's the guy that beat Eminem before he became famous.
03:11:31
What?
03:11:33
We're left to save that for next time.
03:11:35
I don't even know what.
03:11:35
And I'll be like, what?
03:11:38
Say what?
03:11:41
What now?
03:11:44
Oh, fuck is that?
03:11:46
I'm not doing crossovers either.
03:11:47
What's your point here, Gary?
03:11:49
I had ten rap crossovers to cover, but it's 20 minutes long.
03:11:54
I don't fucking know.
03:11:55
What's your favorite rap crossover?
03:11:57
Mount Rushmore of rap.
03:11:58
There we go.
03:11:58
We can tie it together.
03:11:59
What do you mean, crossover?
03:12:02
What do you mean, what?
03:12:03
I mean, the one thing about Mount Rushmore is they are not ranked one through four.
03:12:08
It is just, oh, there's a four on your route.
03:12:11
Much more up there, man.
03:12:16
What, what how do I know his route?
03:12:19
Much more up there, man.
03:12:27
I all I know it was route
03:12:28
much more up there, man.
03:12:33
That's when people need help.
03:12:35
I all I know was route much more up there, man.
03:12:39
A crossover is like, you know, when,
03:12:45
When, it is.
03:12:49
And I know y'all say you're damn.
03:12:54
Oh, yeah.
03:12:56
Also, one of the worst ones ever was when John Rule and Metallica made a song.
03:13:03
And I'm pretty sure they did it.
03:13:06
No access, but say they did it in two different worlds
03:13:08
and just spliced it together like a mash up.
03:13:12
They were actually in the same studio.
03:13:13
John rules cookie monster rock vocals have to be heard
03:13:17
to be believed from the second it starts, and he just bursts into the track.
03:13:22
It's just there was supposed to be DMX knocked out rule
03:13:27
I well, we
03:13:28
did this as a metalhead at the time.
03:13:31
When this came out, I was appalled, disgusted and terrified.
03:13:36
And the combination of the two riffs that Swizz
03:13:38
Beats selected from Metallica for this track switch
03:13:42
so jarringly between each other, this kind of feels like two songs jam.
03:13:48
That's Bob Rock, by the way.
03:13:49
Famous metal and rock producer.
03:13:52
If you've heard a deep, deep, deep, compressed rock,
03:13:55
track in the last 40 years, he probably produced it.
03:14:00
I think that initial thing didn't really sound horrid in my opinion, I don't know.
03:14:04
Oh, it's horrid either, because instrumentally it is.
03:14:09
And I know y'all say you're damn.
03:14:13
Oh, man.
03:14:15
Yeah.
03:14:15
Also, I can't be the only one that feels like the main guitar riff on
03:14:20
this track has a similar rhythm to it as California Love, right?
03:14:24
Do you think?
03:14:33
It's a
03:14:34
weird similarity that I only really noticed when humming it.
03:14:37
Oh, and the worst.
03:14:38
But let's be clear California Love is not written.
03:14:40
That is a sampled old 70s rock song.
03:14:43
Thing about this one is it's kind of shit, but it's really catchy.
03:14:49
I can't stop repeating.
03:14:50
Yeah, we did it.
03:14:54
And just when you thought it was over.
03:14:57
Just when you thought we were done.
03:14:59
It's bad, but it's mesmerizing.
03:15:01
Lingering in my brain like an evil curse.
03:15:04
Now, I have yet to listen to Metallica's discography.
03:15:07
When I do, it's something that I would like to do on camera for the first time,
03:15:11
but this time I've listened to the discography period of Saint Anger.
03:15:15
Do Hate Made, which I am aware is very much
03:15:19
not liked by Metallica at all general level.
03:15:23
So yeah,
03:15:23
the only thing, the only Metallica album that's worse than Saint Anger is load.
03:15:29
The timing make
03:15:30
sense, but we haven't even talked about the best thing related to this track.
03:15:35
It's the fact that right here.
03:15:37
Fun fact by the way, the album cover of load is a slide
03:15:42
closeup under a microscope of semen
03:15:45
on yours, blood and semen.
03:15:47
This.
03:15:48
You can't have semen without blood.
03:15:51
That just goes without saying.
03:15:53
When you got dead comes semen.
03:15:56
Were they that in the semen?
03:15:57
What do they think that was? Semen.
03:16:01
I think there was.
03:16:02
Was this color to get inside jokes.
03:16:05
Studio footage of the making of it.
03:16:08
Everybody's game for whatever you want to do.
03:16:11
Okay, let's just see what happens here. Okay.
03:16:13
That right there. You can play that in party.
03:16:15
This guy right here, I don't know who he is, but I don't like him.
03:16:18
He's the one that's making all the calls on this.
03:16:20
That's what's beat
03:16:23
that his name probably.
03:16:25
Oh yeah. It says right there.
03:16:28
Yeah. That's what's smooth.
03:16:30
I hate on that part.
03:16:31
I'm not sure which is he.
03:16:33
Is he like up there.
03:16:36
We do.
03:16:37
That's producers. Yeah.
03:16:39
It sounds like a party to.
03:16:43
So I think he's this song
03:16:46
like a football team or he's produced a lot of.
03:16:49
Dre produced a lot of DMX.
03:16:51
Yeah. That's cool.
03:16:52
Yeah, we did it. Yeah. Lakers play.
03:16:54
Yeah, yeah, we did it again. Yeah.
03:16:56
It's like not the Lakers LeBron doing a
03:17:02
we haven't heard it for a while.
03:17:03
What does it sound like.
03:17:09
Yeah.
03:17:12
Yeah.
03:17:15
Yeah.
03:17:17
Oh we're absolutely right.
03:17:21
Romance with a little be the hip part.
03:17:24
So we do.
03:17:28
And which also reveals the hilarious.
03:17:31
It seems very corny.
03:17:33
So clearly there's, rap
03:17:35
metal that's a crossover.
03:17:38
The Brad Paisley parts are hilarious.
03:17:41
Yeah.
03:17:42
A skinner, the best ever be was a Jay-Z.
03:17:45
You know, I just want to show you a Leonard Skynyrd fan.
03:17:49
Have other shirts.
03:17:50
What's on Jay-Z and Linkin Park?
03:17:53
Collision course.
03:17:54
That whole project.
03:17:59
That on here?
03:18:00
It must be.
03:18:04
Danny Brown, old school modernizing.
03:18:07
That's punk. I don't know that one.
03:18:08
You know, everyone technical name is going order.
03:18:11
Is this a mount Rushmore?
03:18:13
I was I know it was route.
03:18:15
Much more up there, man.
03:18:17
There you need. You're forgetting one thing.
03:18:19
The one thing for Mount Rushmore is they are not ranked one through four.
03:18:23
It is just. Oh, there's all four.
03:18:27
Yeah.
03:18:27
And that should be number one.
03:18:30
Sadly, I could not come up with four rap crossovers to fill in Mount Rushmore.
03:18:35
I only found country and metal.
03:18:45
So we had dildos.
03:18:48
We had all kinds of toast.
03:18:50
Cheers.
03:18:50
By the way.
03:18:54
We had
03:18:54
crystal skulls, which were debunked before they were even famous.
03:18:57
I don't know why people pay money that because they just want to believe in shit.
03:19:00
Baby, don't forget that boy told you last time.
03:19:04
Yeah,
03:19:06
even Linkin Park was already kind of rapping,
03:19:08
so that's not much of a crossover.
03:19:10
Nu metal is rap and rock.
03:19:14
All righty.
03:19:14
Thank you, thank you, thank you for to kind of get into oh yeah yeah.
03:19:21
So so good game.
03:19:22
Oh that broke me because that drought may be coming okay.
03:19:26
Right now just.
03:19:29
Yeah.
03:19:29
Oh you could do it again.
03:19:31
I mean, I haven't do a single word that you want when you filtered.
03:19:34
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that one for sure. Yeah.
03:19:37
That's like first priority is it's like, oh, spicy shit together.
03:19:41
They actually, like, rerecorded the whole album to me
03:19:43
because the magazine just happened to be a pimp.
03:19:46
She wants us to think, what the fuck?
03:19:47
The price to give me one more chance in.
03:19:49
I seem to take it to two plus two.
03:19:51
Dance to the trash at the Gold Beach.
03:19:53
Come on, you got a little bit.
03:19:55
Oh my. Along with like.
03:19:56
Yeah, you know what I'm saying. Yeah yeah yeah.
03:19:59
See just told her. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah.
03:20:01
You know shit like this before make.
03:20:04
Yeah whatever
03:20:07
other.
03:20:07
There's more to it than that.
03:20:08
There's more rapping.
03:20:10
But we, we stopped for dessert
03:20:13
at the, Union assembly while we were.
03:20:16
It still has to do with rap a little bit.
03:20:19
The union.
03:20:20
We stopped at the Union assembly to have dessert.
03:20:22
After we ate dinner at the Detroiter.
03:20:26
It's water and connected to Union assembly.
03:20:29
We noticed.
03:20:32
I should zoom in.
03:20:34
Mom?
03:20:35
Spaghetti.
03:20:35
Yeah.
03:20:39
That's it.
03:20:41
I got into an argument.
03:20:43
I know there was a museum.
03:20:46
It's just a window.
03:20:46
I don't maybe there's more than one.
03:20:47
Was the museum?
03:20:50
That was.
03:20:52
That's right.
03:20:52
Now I was like, shit, do that, mom spaghetti. And then I.
03:20:54
We couldn't tell if that was a man or woman.
03:20:58
Which one?
03:20:59
The one with our back. With her back.
03:21:01
With his back to us.
03:21:03
Like that's either a woman with giant fucking legs or a woman,
03:21:06
or a man with way too short shorts.
03:21:09
I. But I see a beard.
03:21:13
I see, I see facial hair and shit and
03:21:16
this is kind of like it just looks like a man's jawline,
03:21:19
but it looks like almost a woman's neck line.
03:21:23
The arms are huge, but it doesn't look fat.
03:21:26
I don't know, I'm just, like, broad.
03:21:28
But remember, the stranger was a bride.
03:21:31
Just happened to get shot in my random photo.
03:21:33
I apologize, but you've been the topic of my wife's
03:21:35
and my topic conversation, and now the show your star.
03:21:41
And your legs are jumpy.
03:21:43
Jumpy? Sorry.
03:21:47
You started at zero toast.
03:21:51
Oh, God damn it.
03:21:53
What was his surprise?
03:21:55
Oh, I jumped for the number.
03:21:59
I was advertised for commercial.
03:22:02
Oh, yeah.
03:22:03
Great singer of religion.
03:22:05
Heaven and then forever.
03:22:07
Here's because hell.
03:22:10
Hey,
03:22:12
here's to your
03:22:13
happiness.
03:22:14
You know, smash them with it I can tell, I know, I know, and here's to you, rock.
03:22:19
Walking down that aisle at WrestleMania
03:22:23
as the champion
03:22:25
for the very last time. Oh.
03:22:32
So that's either a toaster.
03:22:35
That reminds me, we used to do toast,
03:22:37
and then the assholes used to clank the top of my beer.
03:22:40
So it forms like that.
03:22:43
Yeah, I hate people.
03:22:45
Yeah, I don't, I don't beer wasting beer.
03:22:47
Exactly.
03:22:48
But the Rock has a toast of his own.
03:22:54
You've got to be buying somebody a beer if you do that to them.
03:22:57
What are you doing?
03:22:58
Showing the Rock's toast.
03:23:00
Except I forgot to unmute.
03:23:03
You would have been way funnier if I just did that.
03:23:05
And it was quick.
03:23:08
Here's
03:23:10
to your health.
03:23:12
Here's to your happiness,
03:23:16
and here's which one's Goldberg's getting worked at WrestleMania.
03:23:20
Not. And.
03:23:29
Neither
03:23:33
is this a nerd shit.
03:23:36
Yeah, I think Tough Guys is nerd shit.
03:23:39
10 million people are watching this shit.
03:23:41
I read about it all the way, actually.
03:23:43
Right. Instead of it's more slack.
03:23:45
God retarded shit. No, damn. It's nurture.
03:23:49
I didn't want to say that.
03:23:50
Like, might make them lose
03:23:52
the battle at WrestleMania going on right here.
03:23:56
What?
03:23:57
By the way?
03:24:02
They looked so young.
03:24:03
That wasn't new, was it?
03:24:05
No. Yeah, that was from just last week.
03:24:08
Nice.
03:24:09
So they can. Real is not fake.
03:24:11
They can fake time now.
03:24:12
Nothing is real
03:24:15
in wrestling.
03:24:17
No. But,
03:24:22
As promised, we do have some Rachel Reagan.
03:24:24
So last week we discussed that, she was teasing
03:24:28
that she was going to go skydiving.
03:24:30
We need a Rachel Reagan's bumper.
03:24:32
We do need to race organs all over. Goddamn it.
03:24:36
Like this shit up.
03:24:39
I have the harness on.
03:24:40
You don't need to watch.
03:24:41
Have you flying the others carry you, put you on the plane.
03:24:46
That's your husband.
03:24:47
Like mom couldn't let him on either one.
03:24:50
If she gets up.
03:24:52
Well, maybe like he, like, is talking to her like a child.
03:24:56
Yeah.
03:24:58
Interesting.
03:24:59
I don't know who's the harness. Come here.
03:25:02
Oh, yeah.
03:25:03
This is the other foot.
03:25:04
This huge head thing.
03:25:07
Oh. Oh, women do at least once a month.
03:25:09
He's got to put your studio fucking sound deadening.
03:25:13
So, where it.
03:25:14
I buy it back, we'll cut little armholes.
03:25:16
I'll be like a little paint patch.
03:25:19
I was trying.
03:25:20
Then why is she going to be Tinkerbell was supposed to accommodate the diaper
03:25:26
boom.
03:25:27
The diaper.
03:25:28
You can't. You think you.
03:25:31
You can't be a Pikachu.
03:25:33
My Pikachu's my actually fit.
03:25:35
Or did I get rid of those?
03:25:37
Your walker?
03:25:38
No. My, Right.
03:25:41
I don't know what the fuck that I hear.
03:25:43
The words I'm saying.
03:25:44
I don't know what your weird.
03:25:46
I mean, she got her arm chopped off.
03:25:48
She got have her arm chopped off, right?
03:25:50
Oh, yeah. She had a lie removed.
03:25:52
I don't know.
03:25:57
But why are they doing that?
03:25:58
So they can put her in baggage instead of paying a ticket?
03:26:01
I don't know, but good thing she's.
03:26:03
Now we're going to Stoney Creek.
03:26:05
Why? She could do two different shelves.
03:26:08
Oh, she got to fork stuff now
03:26:11
with their other hand.
03:26:12
It's probably
03:26:12
because it got all disease and infected from doing fucking eggs and shit.
03:26:16
Like she's taking care of it.
03:26:20
I don't think so.
03:26:21
That's her problem.
03:26:22
That's her prepping. But here's the big day.
03:26:26
Here's the big fucking day.
03:26:28
And, how do I do that?
03:26:30
You guys hanging?
03:26:32
Oh, that's the big one. Actually.
03:26:33
You guys.
03:26:36
She is? Yeah.
03:26:37
This is, this is 11 together,
03:26:40
cuz it gets all over fucking managing my skin in some areas
03:26:46
and tore or blistered.
03:26:48
And that's why I keep in that key,
03:26:52
guys.
03:26:53
And, but any time
03:26:57
there's like me.
03:26:59
Oh, that's all.
03:27:00
Her crotch was covered.
03:27:01
Wrap pursuit. Skydiving.
03:27:03
Yeah, I that.
03:27:07
Sold out.
03:27:10
You fucking.
03:27:15
Look, because you did. I.
03:27:19
I know you.
03:27:22
I would do that.
03:27:24
Yeah.
03:27:24
I mean, the only problem is, I don't want to do it with a
03:27:28
guy strapped to my ass first.
03:27:32
I feel like her.
03:27:33
You have to do that.
03:27:34
I know, go by yourself.
03:27:35
That's why I'm going skydiving.
03:27:37
Because I would never smart.
03:27:40
Yeah, really? Let's see.
03:27:43
You got it. You got to imagine. That's one of your.
03:27:45
That'll be one of your greatest memories.
03:27:46
And, like, no, I mean, on a plane.
03:27:49
That's good enough. It's the same shit. You're crazy.
03:27:52
Do that.
03:27:52
The adrenaline. Yeah.
03:27:53
This is crazy. Yeah, yeah.
03:27:57
You know, I don't know. Do you go.
03:27:58
Do you like roller coasters or anything at all?
03:28:00
It's makes your body feel different.
03:28:03
Drugs.
03:28:04
This has to be quite a rush, is all I'm saying.
03:28:06
It's got to be amazing.
03:28:07
I've never seen anybody go down there like, oh, my God, her hair flew off.
03:28:11
I'd say I'd never felt sorry body for skydiving,
03:28:13
but I actually have started though.
03:28:15
Fall asleep skydiving. They lost consciousness.
03:28:18
Yeah, so that's not even fun.
03:28:20
But dude.
03:28:21
Well, I mean, it's dangerous. Sure,
03:28:24
but I'm pretty sure I would do it if they would let me do it alone.
03:28:26
First.
03:28:29
And you can train.
03:28:30
You don't have to succumb to skydiving because as you can, if you want one,
03:28:34
I'm going to come see.
03:28:36
I mean, I'm going to go, I see I'm going to go skydive.
03:28:39
He's going to go. I'm.
03:28:40
We should all go skydiving.
03:28:42
That should be the show.
03:28:44
That should not be the show.
03:28:47
Somebody could die.
03:28:48
People like that shit.
03:28:50
Somebody could dive
03:28:52
from the sky, dive.
03:28:55
I hope so.
03:28:57
This is why she's the greatest in what she does.
03:29:00
I apologize for the timing of this video.
03:29:02
Having, like, some woman show off her fingers
03:29:05
by golfing right after that segment.
03:29:06
Oh, it's ladies and gents. Look at this in the wall.
03:29:09
Yeah, but she's got no legs.
03:29:10
So this one and that one's going straight.
03:29:13
This is the new door.
03:29:13
If they even made her a female dorf on golf back into the water.
03:29:17
What an incredible shot.
03:29:19
Somebody get her scuba diving gear.
03:29:21
This is why she's the greatest in what she does.
03:29:24
Ladies and gents, look at this. In the water.
03:29:26
She's going to go for this one, and that one's going straight back into the water.
03:29:31
What an incredible shot. Right?
03:29:33
Somebody get her scuba diving gear.
03:29:36
We get away from the shoulders of giants gone by.
03:29:39
We reach for the stars.
03:29:40
We touch the sky.
03:29:42
Boys on the backs of giants.
03:29:44
For starters for we were so loud.
03:29:46
Can we get much higher?
03:29:57
My, what the fuck
03:30:01
to lose, man?
03:30:06
Hello, fellas.
03:30:08
What seems to be the trouble?
03:30:10
We are all over.
03:30:11
I don't know, leave everything to me.
03:30:18
I'm. Okay.
03:30:45
A minute.
03:30:48
But I'm.
03:31:00
I'm sorry, fellas,
03:31:02
I almost forgot.
03:31:06
You. Oh!
03:31:26
Yeah,
03:31:28
that's the TV shows I grew up on.
03:31:32
A regular at regular TV shows.
03:31:34
Not like, quite like.
03:31:36
Yeah.
03:31:38
But cartoons.
03:31:39
This is the cartoons I grew up on.
03:31:42
Play.
03:31:44
I like this ring thing
03:31:46
is boxing, or I'm a member of the black boxing. One.
03:31:49
Black and white trunks, ragged poker, black and old trunks.
03:31:52
Oh, this is just, big black pants.
03:31:55
And that is all. They knocked out?
03:31:58
Oh, no, it's not a skirt.
03:32:01
Or the choker will not back off.
03:32:03
That's why we're getting the want count. Go upstairs.
03:32:06
And I think you get that you some of it.
03:32:08
Big left hand on the right hand.
03:32:11
It goes to someone one there. They do this
03:32:15
swinging here.
03:32:16
Have a punch that doesn't move from Oscar.
03:32:19
Uncle hook from Faulkner.
03:32:20
Left hand right hand side right hand.
03:32:22
Another right for Oscar to go past.
03:32:25
Big right.
03:32:26
The guy's head is thick. His skull is huge.
03:32:29
Tried to try to have people try and slow down the place
03:32:32
to watch his over his crystal skull is huge.
03:32:35
I mean, Oscar and Karen call Jackie Falcon somebody getting up off the canvas
03:32:40
when it's not working or very barely never.
03:32:45
Oh, is he going up,
03:32:46
up, out.
03:32:47
It is actually faster.
03:32:49
I will say fucker. Literally.
03:32:51
He says it's right here.
03:32:53
Still the bucket.
03:32:54
It can do you, you
03:32:58
for us. Got to take his time. Take him.
03:33:01
Oh, my lord, don't jump up. I'm going to stop him.
03:33:03
Is that you're fine.
03:33:04
If he can come forward. Those cuts are
03:33:09
in our main event, Staten Island.
03:33:11
Come on. Right hand down. Goes back.
03:33:15
Did he say an hour made a man?
03:33:17
I think so, don't take his time.
03:33:19
These cuts don't jump up.
03:33:21
It's not cut open. You're fine.
03:33:23
No, I think it's just like that.
03:33:25
Or it's like splatter.
03:33:27
Sure. Come forward.
03:33:29
40s remaining.
03:33:30
And I need a bench standing, I made him.
03:33:33
I don't like the face of that. Go!
03:33:36
Stop it! Oscar!
03:33:37
He just ran into a punch.
03:33:39
Literally ran into wall.
03:33:41
Don't run into the punch again.
03:33:43
The mandatory eight count.
03:33:45
Give me the Derby Oscar from referee count.
03:33:48
We fight on with 20s.
03:33:50
I thought Grissom,
03:33:51
I thought they would have been into this fight on the left hand.
03:33:54
Right hand?
03:33:56
Oh, that is rude as he's crying.
03:34:01
Harvey. Harry, Oscar's gotta get on this round.
03:34:03
He's hurt badly.
03:34:04
His legs are not underneath themselves.
03:34:07
Yeah, that's.
03:34:09
He's good.
03:34:10
That's round the corner.
03:34:11
You sitting on that dude?
03:34:13
I had to be myself.
03:34:14
Freeze up to give that up.
03:34:17
I take it that up.
03:34:21
All right. But you are bad.
03:34:24
Good for the first to play them I love you.
03:34:27
Come. Let's go, baby.
03:34:28
Come on, take it nice, but you can't go
03:34:34
watching you.
03:34:34
No, no,
03:34:37
I want to like you.
03:34:41
Understand?
03:34:42
Oh yes I where for
03:34:48
real? On.
03:34:50
Oh. Wait.
03:34:53
The green one's going the other way.
03:34:54
Gary, you already sent this one. Yeah.
03:34:57
You already watch.
03:34:59
That's my only. That's my only chicken.
03:35:00
I got one named Carl. You said the car was going to win.
03:35:04
I think the car is always going to win.
03:35:07
You make the joke.
03:35:08
That's very disappointing.
03:35:11
Yeah.
03:35:11
The fuck? Gary?
03:35:13
Oh, yeah.
03:35:14
Beat me like.
03:35:19
Bam, I like this.
03:35:21
I love the saying if parents do not educate their children, nature
03:35:24
will.
03:35:36
Dude, never fuck with a mama.
03:35:37
Anything and.
03:35:41
Yeah. You,
03:35:42
Fuck chromosome milf motherfucker.
03:35:49
Wait. Yeah.
03:35:50
You're a motherfucker.
03:35:52
No. If you're fucking with mothers,
03:35:54
you're a motherfucker.
03:35:57
Okay.
03:36:00
Fucking truck it.
03:36:01
It was a fucking joke.
03:36:02
It just fucked over.
03:36:05
It's spilling out. It's funny.
03:36:07
Oh, drat.
03:36:08
Fuck! You will
03:36:10
that. Yeah. Yeah.
03:36:12
You from the.
03:36:14
You? Yeah.
03:36:16
Oh, yeah.
03:36:18
What the fuck?
03:36:19
It's a shit before you.
03:36:21
It's. It's fucked over.
03:36:24
It's spilling out. It's funny.
03:36:26
LeBron's fuck you will.
03:36:31
You turn the fuck up.
03:36:33
Look at you.
03:36:35
Oh yeah.
03:36:36
Sorry guys.
03:36:38
He's a very excited.
03:36:40
And then a Ford smashed into it man.
03:36:43
He was way too excited.
03:36:44
He there's some about truck people.
03:36:46
He listen to country I don't trust him.
03:36:48
Oh I'm sorry I missed it.
03:36:49
Now that's 130 I totally forgot yesterday the 11th was actual
03:36:53
like National Presidents joke Day.
03:36:57
So we were supposed to oversaturate with these stupid,
03:36:59
you know, the single one of them warm. And I know it's August.
03:37:02
Here we are.
03:37:03
And that reminds me of a sweltering hot day in my boyhood
03:37:07
and on a Sunday morning, going to church.
03:37:09
Well, exactly.
03:37:10
Well that's disgusting.
03:37:12
First of all, what did he say?
03:37:16
Second of all, he said a sweltering hot day in his boyhood.
03:37:19
Second of all, fuck starts a conversation like that
03:37:23
and very well, he said, I am
03:37:25
going to preach because of the heat, the shortest sermon you've ever heard.
03:37:29
And he said, just seven words.
03:37:30
If you think it's hot now, wait.
03:37:37
You know you get it because.
03:37:38
Because hell, I don't get it.
03:37:42
It's hot in hell.
03:37:51
It's the Brady and Roger
03:37:53
Brady and Gary as a pervert.
03:37:57
So bimbo.
03:37:58
Copy. So blows lady in the show.
03:38:01
I do it this way.
03:38:04
We're gonna make it make our dreams come true.
03:38:06
Brady, Brady and with Brady and draw.
03:38:11
It's a no show.
03:38:12
No Brady draw. I'm probably wrong.
03:38:15
Oh, okay.
03:38:18
Okay.
03:38:22
Except that I just just a little legend or not
03:38:25
unequivocally good that your specific faith may not be.
03:38:29
See I kept the non-religious, the bad religion.
03:38:31
Awful large rants for a traditional country.
03:38:34
Yeah, this is Brady.
03:38:36
He not be ethically good.
03:38:38
And that may not even be logically correct.
03:38:41
Ethics is arguable.
03:38:43
You can't anytime anybody says ethics is good,
03:38:47
doesn't understand ethics.
03:38:51
If it's good, it's not.
03:38:53
If you if you know something is good.
03:38:57
There's no ethics in it.
03:38:59
It's just good.
03:39:00
It has to be arguably good for one person and bad for another,
03:39:03
and bad for one person and good for another.
03:39:05
Then it's an ethical
03:39:08
maybe not
03:39:10
its point.
03:39:11
The question of God's existence is no longer burdened
03:39:15
by the weight of a seemingly benevolent, perfect.
03:39:19
The emotional and social reasons for needing
03:39:22
a god to exist have been significantly diminished.
03:39:27
The rationalizations that kept you going along with the flow.
03:39:30
An existing car. It's in his blood.
03:39:33
The job.
03:39:33
Scientists say these new findings come after months of experiment,
03:39:37
including studying Carl's reaction to spiders down his shirt
03:39:40
and just looking at all the gay stuff Carl does is what we're reporting.
03:39:45
Carl eats weird food.
03:39:46
Carl can't handle a few spiders down his shirt, squirms when you look at him,
03:39:49
cries just like a little girl when he doesn't get his way.
03:39:53
Is bad at football.
03:39:55
Carries a huge bag with him everywhere.
03:39:57
Makes a girl sound with his mouth.
03:39:59
Listens to his wife and doesn't do the mouth open.
03:40:02
Scientists study how far reaching implications
03:40:06
we are advising all female Americans to continue not eating lunch with Carl,
03:40:12
and reminding everyone to keep hotdogs
03:40:15
and bananas away from Carl, as he will probably try to marry them.
03:40:19
Jack.
03:40:20
Scientists warn that their next understanding
03:40:22
may not be successful, saying, quote, we're going to use the sound crazy
03:40:26
to try and find Carl's boner.
03:40:28
It may take years.
03:40:30
After years of research, we now have definitive proof the gay gene exists.
03:40:34
And Carl, it's in his blood.
03:40:36
The job.
03:40:37
Scientists say these new findings come after.
03:40:42
Little.
03:40:42
Yeah.
03:40:42
We got we got to wind down the show with some nice peacefulness here.
03:40:45
That's so silly.
03:40:52
I the Joy of painting
03:40:55
with Bob Ross. Hi.
03:40:59
Welcome to Joy of painting.
03:41:00
I'm happy to see you here today.
03:41:02
So today we're going to be teaching you
03:41:05
how to draw a nice spoon in a landscape
03:41:09
of Muhammad.
03:41:09
Peace, matzo and lip smacking going on there some dry.
03:41:12
So let's show you how to start.
03:41:13
You got to get your paint ready. I prefer to use oils.
03:41:16
You could use pastels, whatever you pick.
03:41:19
Painting can be easy for anybody.
03:41:21
Let's just pick a nice neutral color.
03:41:25
And we are going to
03:41:26
just start drawing Muhammad a little prophet.
03:41:29
They well, let me grab a color.
03:41:31
There we go.
03:41:32
Just give him a body a little bit of a body there.
03:41:35
Sikh doesn't have to be complex.
03:41:37
Traditional headdress.
03:41:41
Let's give this
03:41:42
let's keep this.
03:41:46
Nice.
03:41:49
Take your face.
03:41:50
This is important.
03:42:07
You are your.
03:42:13
Lovely.
03:42:20
Face. Oh.
03:42:28
Thank you.
03:42:30
Oh, no.
03:42:34
Don't you want to come down?
03:42:38
No matter.
03:42:39
You? Yes.
03:42:44
Know.
03:42:44
Oh! The.
03:43:01
Bottom.
03:43:02
My my sugar falls.
03:43:07
Yes. You still
03:43:11
got a mountain of sugar.
03:43:12
We got that.
03:43:14
Should be.
03:43:21
A lot of.
03:43:33
No no no no.
03:43:36
Wash for those.
03:43:39
Hi, guys,
03:43:41
I come on.
03:43:43
Oh, I love that.
03:43:45
Oh okay. Okay.
03:43:47
Next up, let's have a look.
03:43:50
I love. You.
03:43:57
How is that?
03:44:00
Whoa.
03:44:02
Oh, I.
03:44:52
Hate. Oh.
03:45:22
Hey. I.
03:45:32
Greet you guys.
03:45:33
I'm getting him.
03:45:35
Gary, do you get hit?
03:45:53
Good.
03:45:56
It come.
03:45:59
Now. You don't know.
03:46:04
How to.
03:46:13
Some come back.
03:46:17
Some don't show.
03:46:29
Here's
03:46:30
to Jerry.
03:46:39
Cheers to Gary.
03:46:47
Memories linger.
03:46:52
Remembering to check.
03:46:56
Echoes of laughter.
03:47:00
Now. Despair.
03:47:05
Could save him.
03:47:08
Not even with his homemade knife.
03:47:13
Left.
03:47:14
You pick up the pieces.
03:47:16
The producers, not the.
03:47:21
Here's
03:47:22
to Gary.
03:47:30
Cheers to Gary.
03:47:36
The fuck you!
03:47:36
Memphis. Never coming back, but fuck him.
03:47:40
Hard to.
03:47:48
Cheers to Gary.
03:47:53
The fucking Memphis never coming back.
03:47:56
But fuck him.
03:47:57
Hard to.
03:48:05
Cheers to Gary.
03:48:14
So we raise our glasses
03:48:18
with a mix of cheers.
03:48:23
To the ones who remain
03:48:27
standing tall and clear.
03:48:32
And to Gary,
03:48:35
the crook who stepped like so.
03:48:41
May his memory fade
03:48:44
with the dawn of each new show.
03:48:51
Turn.
03:48:59
Cheers to Gary.
03:49:04
But fuck him before he's never coming back.
03:49:07
But fuck him hard
03:49:11
and then.
03:49:16
Cheers to Gary.
03:49:20
What the fuck
03:49:22
if if he's never coming back, will fuck him hard.